Renders from my Advanced Illustration for Production Class. The sketch on the right is my instructors drawing, the renders on the left are my 3D model of his building.
It's hard to tell what I am looking at. The lighting is very harsh and you have an interesting composition of shots jammed into 1 image. I think you might have something really cool here but you are letting yourself down with the presentation! Try look up some presentation documentation for the software you are using, looks like 3DS max or Maya to me but I could be wrong.
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