In terms of modeling tools, Max, Modo, and XSI are the kings. But the only program with a system comparable to Maxs modifier stack, and the flexibility it brings, is Blender.
Ninjas -- not sure where you're at in Confusion, but it picks up speed later on. I'm nearly done with it and look forward to starting System of the World.
Bad karma. The pole target bone is the only way that i know of that usually fixes this kind of issues. And when this does not fix it then i am out of ideas. Well, the Blender bones system has its quirks ...
I agree nothing is going to give you better results than doing it all by hand but what a task that is. I do a few metric tons of lip sync every year. Pretty much the same situation it sounds like. The two apps you're looking at, don't. They are both horrible. At work we looked into them both extensively and came to the…