I've been here for a rand total of two days:
-My dad has rallied my uncle older cousin Stan, and some random guests t convince me I'm wasting my 20's making games.
-My mom haasses me about different things on an hourly basis.
-My lil cousin Gus has no bals, its a wonder he's made it to 18, I'm getting sick of him.
-My lil cousin tanya is the only cool relative lef. She's burnt out now cuz he's been here for over a week.
-I bought my dad al kins of cool toys for his laptop, and he told me he'd be giving me the old laptop since no one's usining it. mom conviennetly donated it to some other andom family member and then started yelling at me when i said it wasnt really col of her to do that when I arrangd this with dad 6 months ago. M mom is a great mom but a real people pleaser and it's getting in my way *arg*
....I have 4 days left i don't think I'm gunna make it.
seems like the last tie with my family is now permanently broken. Bit complicated, but suffice to say my christmas is utterly ruined.
been building up for the last 10 years really.
I resolve in future to let people know my thoughts straight away, rather than letting stuff fester inside.
My family celebrated Christmas (in our ultra-secular just-an-excuse-to-get-together way) last Sunday when I was home for vacation. We've come to a fairly precise understanding of our dysfunctionality so the holidays have become less and less uncomfortable and confused. This one was downright pleasant.
I think the best thing for a family is to agree that "the perfect family" is subjective, and applies to families which do not try to torture themselves into being something that they're not.
I´m having Xmas dinner with my familie in 15 mins, that will be interesting . I´ll be colliding with my father again because he is an absolute buisnessman and I´m an artist ... 2 totally different ways of thinking = lots of hassels
But now I tend to just respect him for what he is and I can get on well with him, ... if I want to
great fun, i drank as much as i could drink. It ended up that i forgot the half of the evening.. Fortunately my brother, cousin and my mother were also drunk. Great fun...
fucked bigtime. Went as I expected ... he started haveing a go at me about doing gameart and how I want to make money of that and blablabla and I was so stupid to start talking with him about that (cuz I had a few drinks)
... it ended with me telling him to go screw himself if he makes fun of what I do.
Had my uncle and his partner over from Norway for dinner, they are staying till New Year. He can be annoying sometimes but it seems better this year. Also nice to talk to his partner because she's an artist, and has done some pretty cool stuff (one of her watercolours is hanging in our dining room).
I'm sorry that not everyone gets to have such a good experience.
Well, I'm athiest as well, but that doesn't meant you can't enjoy the holiday season. I spent today with my g/f and her mother. Good food, good times, great gifts!
Unfortuneate to hear that some of you are having such a bad time.
We had a suprisngly great christmas... very calm and easy... the last few years have been insane though... which is why we are not having christmas with that part of the familty for a while i suppose... sucks that you guys have to go through that hell with arguments etc. on an evening that is supposed to be so special.
I feel bad for all PCers who have family strife at holidays... I guess I can count myself lucky for being on good terms with both sides, genetic and in-law. However, the obligations of this holiday have gotten to my wife, she's been stomping around grumbling 'I hate Christmas!' I support her entirely. This many obligations of time and money make the whole experience like being car-jacked in the name of fun and fellowship.
However, we did find it therapeutic last night to sing all the verses of the classic tune 'Mr. Grinch', which I now think of as our official Christmas theme. Here, try it. Just sing along (you know the tune!) and think about all the freaking annoyances of commercialized Western Christmastime as you belt it out. You'll feel better, I'm sure.
Went fine. jave a large family an dall took over my brother's house in Santa Rosa. one little note of discord during dinner on the subject of politics, but otherwise, things went well, and I am sooo glad the bro's kids are no longer pre-verbal infants. turning into pretty good little girls. One is going to be a drama queen, and the a contratian prankster. I do nto envy my bnrother, but I anjoyed all their company. Used my christmas bonus to spoil my Dad and the little girls. The rest are quite happy with a good book and a comfy chair. :-)
We recently bought a new car and some various other high-priced items like a new VCR/DVD player, DVD burner, more RAM, some overseas plane tickets, etc., so my mother decided we wouldn't spend any money on gifts this year, absolutely no gifts because they usually turn out to be gimmicky and shit we don't really want. So no gifts <b>at all</b>, my brother's in Cambodia, and my mother's entering the second week of blatantly ignoring her daughter in private and in public. All that shit, topped off with the insane decision to have a <b>$600 Christmas lunch</b> at an empty restaurant - mouse-sized portions devoid of taste. What a fucking shitty, shitty Christmas. What the fuck is up with that... no gifts because money is tight, so we spend six hundred dollars on the worst lunch I've ever had? My mother ruined Christmas.
I think my shitty Christmas is the winner. Due to bad weather and power outages, I couldn't travel, so I spent Christmas alone in my two-room apartment, eating day old, store bought macaroni salad. The rest of my entire family got together without me, my recently ex-girlfriend was off with her family and all of my friends were out of town. The 'good' side, I guess, is that I'm able to spend the weekend working uninterrupted; my present contractors insist that content be delivered on Monday the 27th rather than the originally scheduled 29th, which I really can't argue against at this point because I need the money to pay the rent next week.
ok, ok, be grateful for what you got and where you are, and thanks the powers that you weren't in SE Asia, or you don't live in iraq or serve in our fine nations (US/UK) armed forces there or in some other foreign shit-hole where life is worse than it is in the great nations of democracy, freedom and captialist greed america and britain
*looks all noble as a fluttering flag appears in the background and the national anthem plays*
I gave up trying to please relatives a long time ago. I make sure my wife and kids come first before any other family. So far it's worked out pretty good. My wife's family traditionaly opens presents on Christmas Eve and I'm used to Christmas morning so it works well. My wife makes a great Christmas day dinner and the immediate family is invited on one condition: Leave the humbug attitude/family problems at the door and enjoy the evening or don't bother coming. That's about it
Mom and Dad are trying to marry me off to this cute indian girl. her mom and my mom are getting along great, and she works in oil & gas like my father, so Dad has instantly taken to her. I'm never gunna hear`the end of this.
"array Rossy, why didnt you marry that fab girl Amy??"
The added bonus of Mexico is that my cell phone doesnt work here so none of my numerous relations can really track me down easily. if they saw me talking to the cute girls at the pool instead of 'oil and gas girl' they'd prolly cut into me for at least 30 mins straight.
Only 2 days left 'till i get back to seattle. i can't wait!
Mine managed to be pretty decent! Usually it's a highly stressful time mostly due to my mom turning up bitchiness level to code red during the last two weeks before Christmas. Usually ends up she would lay in bed loathing us while we unwrapped presents in awkward silence...but luckily this year leadig up to christmas me and my sister were both out working all week.
Christmas eve mom got a little pissy, but I told her not to let it ruin Christmas and for once she *gasps in shock* LISTENED!
I'm just wondering, for those of you with the choice of whether or not to celebrate with a family you dislike, why even bother?
Rage: For me...cuz I sincerally love my family, I just hate being judged all the time for things I'm not willing to change just cuz they dislike them.
I wish my family respected concepts and lifestyles hat don't align with there own.
I suspect that they indeed 'do' accept other people living differently just not their only son, continuing the Patel family line/traditions ect ect.
I'm grateful my parents and exended family have the same values and political views...we don't really fight ever, they just constantly grind away at me tryna change who I am to align with their idea of how I should be.
Join the club, isn't surprising when those born before the gaming generation don't tend to see games as a form of art. They tend to take more pride when their sons or daughters are doctors, or armed forces or asbestos salemen, etc etc ;D
Wasn't a great one for me. I broke up with my girl on Christmas eve because she apparently had this wild notion that she could verbally burn me down, tell me how unhealthy I was for her (but not her kids) and what a bad man I am under the blackmail that if I salvaged what little I had of my self-respect and left her on the Eve of the birth of Our Lord and not take her to Christmas with my family the next day (where she knew my mother spent close to 5 digits on gifts) then it could be nothing less than an unforgivable atrocity (at least my "unforgivable atrocities" would have alot of company)
The upside is I got out of something that was getting very abusive to me and my dysfunctional family rallied around me and we had a fun day.
I can honestly say I gave 100% and tried to make the best out of every situation so I'll take that with me and move on to the next chapter.
Finally something I can post about. I'm about 2 steps from the edge of a cliff this year. I'll give you the short version.
My fiance is forcing me to move to Indiana to be with her family. She also expects me to give up my 50k+ Department of Defense contract job, all of my friends, and all of my family. Her family consists of ex-cons, drug users, pregnant teenagers, and her father is gay. She, as far as I'm conserned, is a genetic mutation beyond anything iv'e ever seen. She is nothing like her family. So, being the only one who has a job I had to drive her out there for the xmas season, but since she decided to tell me at the last minute, I could'nt spend it with her. So I'm alone for her birthday, xmas, our aniversary, and new years.
On top of that, I had to pay for the trips with my own money, totaling over $500, and had to drive up and back in a single weekend. Thats 20+ hours of driving. And I get to do it again when I pick her up, January 3rd.
To top THAT off, I hav'nt had a weekend break since the 18th with all of this driving, and last weekend I went to VA beach to spend xmas with my mother for the first time in oh...6 years. That was a nightmare, and I got caught in the snow, go figure it was only snowing in that area. I had to stay an extra day.
I'm 99% sure i'm going to break up with my fiance' of 4 years. And I've been just recently been to the hospital for chest pains, and diagnosed as at high risk for heart attack, and very high blood pressure. I'm only 24, and I have to take pills and watch my stress and diet. I also wake up with blood in my sinus every morning from the blood pressure conflicting with my weak sinus veins (genetic, my dad suposedly had the same thing and had to get his cauterized).
Worst year and xmas ever. But people still have it worse then I do. At least I have all the wonderfull art work here to keep me entertained. God that felt good to rant. Thanks whoever read that. You deserve something for it.
I ha da great toime. Aileen and I went to my sisters and her partner as usual, my mum and dad flew across from Ireland.
I got some great gifts, for once my mums vouchers turned out to be for "Game" rather than something silly, I got CDs, DVDs, Aileen got me a leather jacket, my sis got my Chobits 3-5, and later when my sisters partners family arrived I got a bottle of jack daniels. I drank the JD and we had a great night, no fights.
and to top it all off, my nephew jack was 3 1/2 this year, old enoguh for his first knoweldge of Santa. I spent 2 days playing with Lego and Meccano and drawing and reading.
I didn't even have a hangover on Boxing day.
And for Hogmany we are going to Edinburgh for 4 days -i have 2 tickets to the street party, but I dunno if we will bother with that, there are a few parties going on.
I am so glad someone posted a good one! I thought I was the only one, after reading this for awhile. Harl and I went up to minnesota to see my family for 4 days. It has been agreed by everyone involved that I've polled that this has been the best christmas our family has ever had.
I really think a lot of it has to do with the fact that as we're all getting older, expectations are more realistic, rather than the massive stress of the 'perfect' martha-stuart-super-santa-everyone-jolly dream. We didn't even do a big christmas dinner. My Dad had made a turkey breast a few days before, so we used the leftovers and made turkey pie. Laid out a big spread of finger foods, muffins, danishes, pies, etc all day so people could nibble as much as they wanted. Took naps on couches, watched dumb tv, tried to fool every new visitor with the electonic remote controlled fart machine my Dad had bought. In general, bliss.
New years looks to be similar. Meeting some friends at a local coffee shop early, for coffee & sandwiches. Heading to our house to watch the collectors edition Mary Poppins, plus the extras (Harl should never have told us he's never seen it!), then off to a party around 11. Wendy is sober driver, which rules, and we don't plan on staying late.
Dudes. This thread was for rants. Downsizer had a right.
Downsizer. I do want to say though are you sure you aren't making your stress worse than it is? In example you talk bout your GF father being gay. How is this going to hurt you? Has he come on to you? Dont you think this may make a better relationship as a family since he wont push you towards a ideal for "his little girl"? The people taking drugs, does that hurt you?
Well, I can see where they deserve to make that comment, most people do.
I should have stated at the end, that I love her unconditionally. I would do anything for her, she's saved my life, and reminded me I can still love durring very difficult times. Dealing with her family is nothing compared to my past.
The only reason why her father being gay is a headache is because of his difficult personality. I would love it it he was flamboyant, but he is'nt. He's difficult to explain, but he's the type that has to be appeased or he'll turn the whole family against you. So it's more of his character and placing difficulties in our paths, then him being gay. I really dont care about his preference. His 'boyfriend' is actually a very nice guy come to think of it.
The drug issue concerns me, because I care about these people. They are important to my fiance, so I worry. It's a recent discovery by the family, but it's not something you'd call a secret if you met the family member on drugs. It's just difficult thinking my life will be filled with Jerry Spinger episodes, when my life is very professional now.
I aprpeciate you defending the rant. Thats all it was, everyone needs steam released. The health issues are my problem, I don't deal with stress like normal people. I tend to let myself be pushed around by others descisions. I also tend to be the target of all problems, due to my fiance not showing efforts in certain areas. But life is a learning experience. We grow and become a closer couple because of the hardships. I would'nt trade my experiences with her for anything, I would'nt be who I am today. That goes for everyones bad xmas, at least be proud you are whom you've become because of your lessons learned.
Surely it can't take THAT long to check e-mail... doesn't take much effort to say "Sure, no problem!" and go to do something else like read a book or magazine for 10-20 minutes, and it'd be appreciated. Some people just don't know the meaning of "generosity"...
Replies
And will add that I'm spend Xmas with my gf's family. Good times. Lots of snow. Nice to have a break for normal life.
-My dad has rallied my uncle older cousin Stan, and some random guests t convince me I'm wasting my 20's making games.
-My mom haasses me about different things on an hourly basis.
-My lil cousin Gus has no bals, its a wonder he's made it to 18, I'm getting sick of him.
-My lil cousin tanya is the only cool relative lef. She's burnt out now cuz he's been here for over a week.
-I bought my dad al kins of cool toys for his laptop, and he told me he'd be giving me the old laptop since no one's usining it. mom conviennetly donated it to some other andom family member and then started yelling at me when i said it wasnt really col of her to do that when I arrangd this with dad 6 months ago. M mom is a great mom but a real people pleaser and it's getting in my way *arg*
....I have 4 days left i don't think I'm gunna make it.
Sorry about your luck Pak
been building up for the last 10 years really.
I resolve in future to let people know my thoughts straight away, rather than letting stuff fester inside.
seesm like family pain is the worst kind
I think the best thing for a family is to agree that "the perfect family" is subjective, and applies to families which do not try to torture themselves into being something that they're not.
But now I tend to just respect him for what he is and I can get on well with him, ... if I want to
... it ended with me telling him to go screw himself if he makes fun of what I do.
I'm sorry that not everyone gets to have such a good experience.
Auhh, being atheist has its advantages.
(Pak, your Dad is an ass disrespecting your choice like that)
HAPPY QUANZA!
Unfortuneate to hear that some of you are having such a bad time.
However, we did find it therapeutic last night to sing all the verses of the classic tune 'Mr. Grinch', which I now think of as our official Christmas theme. Here, try it. Just sing along (you know the tune!) and think about all the freaking annoyances of commercialized Western Christmastime as you belt it out. You'll feel better, I'm sure.
/jzero
Scott
Broke up with my gf a couple weeks ago so thats money saved on gifts.
On the other hand
We recently bought a new car and some various other high-priced items like a new VCR/DVD player, DVD burner, more RAM, some overseas plane tickets, etc., so my mother decided we wouldn't spend any money on gifts this year, absolutely no gifts because they usually turn out to be gimmicky and shit we don't really want. So no gifts <b>at all</b>, my brother's in Cambodia, and my mother's entering the second week of blatantly ignoring her daughter in private and in public. All that shit, topped off with the insane decision to have a <b>$600 Christmas lunch</b> at an empty restaurant - mouse-sized portions devoid of taste. What a fucking shitty, shitty Christmas. What the fuck is up with that... no gifts because money is tight, so we spend six hundred dollars on the worst lunch I've ever had? My mother ruined Christmas.
Happy holidays, kids.
Yeah, I hear they had a good ol' time in Iraq, since there weren't any tidal waves. Just, you know, bombs. And people being shot.
had a good old chat,resolved a few things , agreed to disagree on others.
*looks all noble as a fluttering flag appears in the background and the national anthem plays*
Otherwise only the boyfriend pissed me off to the point of tears.
"array Rossy, why didnt you marry that fab girl Amy??"
The added bonus of Mexico is that my cell phone doesnt work here so none of my numerous relations can really track me down easily. if they saw me talking to the cute girls at the pool instead of 'oil and gas girl' they'd prolly cut into me for at least 30 mins straight.
Only 2 days left 'till i get back to seattle. i can't wait!
-R
Christmas eve mom got a little pissy, but I told her not to let it ruin Christmas and for once she *gasps in shock* LISTENED!
I'm just wondering, for those of you with the choice of whether or not to celebrate with a family you dislike, why even bother?
I wish my family respected concepts and lifestyles hat don't align with there own.
I suspect that they indeed 'do' accept other people living differently just not their only son, continuing the Patel family line/traditions ect ect.
I'm grateful my parents and exended family have the same values and political views...we don't really fight ever, they just constantly grind away at me tryna change who I am to align with their idea of how I should be.
-R
The upside is I got out of something that was getting very abusive to me and my dysfunctional family rallied around me and we had a fun day.
I can honestly say I gave 100% and tried to make the best out of every situation so I'll take that with me and move on to the next chapter.
My fiance is forcing me to move to Indiana to be with her family. She also expects me to give up my 50k+ Department of Defense contract job, all of my friends, and all of my family. Her family consists of ex-cons, drug users, pregnant teenagers, and her father is gay. She, as far as I'm conserned, is a genetic mutation beyond anything iv'e ever seen. She is nothing like her family. So, being the only one who has a job I had to drive her out there for the xmas season, but since she decided to tell me at the last minute, I could'nt spend it with her. So I'm alone for her birthday, xmas, our aniversary, and new years.
On top of that, I had to pay for the trips with my own money, totaling over $500, and had to drive up and back in a single weekend. Thats 20+ hours of driving. And I get to do it again when I pick her up, January 3rd.
To top THAT off, I hav'nt had a weekend break since the 18th with all of this driving, and last weekend I went to VA beach to spend xmas with my mother for the first time in oh...6 years. That was a nightmare, and I got caught in the snow, go figure it was only snowing in that area. I had to stay an extra day.
I'm 99% sure i'm going to break up with my fiance' of 4 years. And I've been just recently been to the hospital for chest pains, and diagnosed as at high risk for heart attack, and very high blood pressure. I'm only 24, and I have to take pills and watch my stress and diet. I also wake up with blood in my sinus every morning from the blood pressure conflicting with my weak sinus veins (genetic, my dad suposedly had the same thing and had to get his cauterized).
Worst year and xmas ever. But people still have it worse then I do. At least I have all the wonderfull art work here to keep me entertained. God that felt good to rant. Thanks whoever read that. You deserve something for it.
Thank fucking god!
Downsizer- Grow a pair and cut that train wreck loose. Your only 24 and your heath is that bad? Time for a life change.
Downsizer- Grow a pair and cut that train wreck loose. Your only 24 and your heath is that bad? Time for a life change.
[/ QUOTE ]
Seriously.
I got some great gifts, for once my mums vouchers turned out to be for "Game" rather than something silly, I got CDs, DVDs, Aileen got me a leather jacket, my sis got my Chobits 3-5, and later when my sisters partners family arrived I got a bottle of jack daniels. I drank the JD and we had a great night, no fights.
and to top it all off, my nephew jack was 3 1/2 this year, old enoguh for his first knoweldge of Santa. I spent 2 days playing with Lego and Meccano and drawing and reading.
I didn't even have a hangover on Boxing day.
And for Hogmany we are going to Edinburgh for 4 days -i have 2 tickets to the street party, but I dunno if we will bother with that, there are a few parties going on.
I really think a lot of it has to do with the fact that as we're all getting older, expectations are more realistic, rather than the massive stress of the 'perfect' martha-stuart-super-santa-everyone-jolly dream. We didn't even do a big christmas dinner. My Dad had made a turkey breast a few days before, so we used the leftovers and made turkey pie. Laid out a big spread of finger foods, muffins, danishes, pies, etc all day so people could nibble as much as they wanted. Took naps on couches, watched dumb tv, tried to fool every new visitor with the electonic remote controlled fart machine my Dad had bought. In general, bliss.
New years looks to be similar. Meeting some friends at a local coffee shop early, for coffee & sandwiches. Heading to our house to watch the collectors edition Mary Poppins, plus the extras (Harl should never have told us he's never seen it!), then off to a party around 11. Wendy is sober driver, which rules, and we don't plan on staying late.
If nothing else you'll be humming and whistling all those songs for the next few days
eg. The 'So-long, Farewell,Auf Wiedersehen, Goodbye' song. I only remember it from the Saturday Night Live season ender where the whole cast sings it.
And yes the next day I caught myself humming that one.
Downsizer. I do want to say though are you sure you aren't making your stress worse than it is? In example you talk bout your GF father being gay. How is this going to hurt you? Has he come on to you? Dont you think this may make a better relationship as a family since he wont push you towards a ideal for "his little girl"? The people taking drugs, does that hurt you?
I should have stated at the end, that I love her unconditionally. I would do anything for her, she's saved my life, and reminded me I can still love durring very difficult times. Dealing with her family is nothing compared to my past.
The only reason why her father being gay is a headache is because of his difficult personality. I would love it it he was flamboyant, but he is'nt. He's difficult to explain, but he's the type that has to be appeased or he'll turn the whole family against you. So it's more of his character and placing difficulties in our paths, then him being gay. I really dont care about his preference. His 'boyfriend' is actually a very nice guy come to think of it.
The drug issue concerns me, because I care about these people. They are important to my fiance, so I worry. It's a recent discovery by the family, but it's not something you'd call a secret if you met the family member on drugs. It's just difficult thinking my life will be filled with Jerry Spinger episodes, when my life is very professional now.
I aprpeciate you defending the rant. Thats all it was, everyone needs steam released. The health issues are my problem, I don't deal with stress like normal people. I tend to let myself be pushed around by others descisions. I also tend to be the target of all problems, due to my fiance not showing efforts in certain areas. But life is a learning experience. We grow and become a closer couple because of the hardships. I would'nt trade my experiences with her for anything, I would'nt be who I am today. That goes for everyones bad xmas, at least be proud you are whom you've become because of your lessons learned.
I wish you all a great new year.
: Had a great christmas, probably because I spent it with the missus and some good friends rather than our families...
/Palm