You got a games development dream? Good, now put it away!
polycounter lvl 9
I see young hopefuls and wannabes posting on here asking for help about what to do in relation to education, and actually finding ways to their intended goals. They are clearly passionate types with stars in their eyes and would proudly proclaim it's their "Dream" to be in the Game Industry and it powers their ambition. Being one of these types myself I feel often abliged to make hopefully useful comments in those threads even though my advice is way beyond my experience. I want to write this post to continue doing that, but from a personal enlightening regarding this "Dream"
I too have this "Dream" I won't tell you my life story, you've all heard it before. I will say that if you ask me what I want to do with my life I would exclaim that, "I want to make video games!" Just like a small child. I don't really have anything to boast for what little of my efforts though, yet I find no other life-choice appealing. How could one want to do so many great things and yet struggle to perform them?
Well if you are powered by this strange calling and you know it, and you are a fresh-un with no experience or skill to learn from, well good, you have something that will always be there for you, and I hope you never lose it.
BUT PLEASE PUT IT AWAY. Don't think about it and don't talk about it. Don't look at it for inspiration, and don't let it be held above you like a carrot on a stick.
Just do what comes naturally, just do what you love. If you love making games then go and do it. Don't think about your career and the industry and what part of it 'fits' into your Dream.
*EDIT* Actually I should restate that I am in no way establishing that somebody should disregard or throw away their dream to be somehow more productive. I still have mine and I know it, and it gives me a sense of purpose. I'm simply not using it as point of reference or reflection of what I have done/not done. *EDIT*
For me it was bringing me down. I knew what I wanted to be and what I wanted to do when I became it, but for me it was a lofty future with no connecting strings of possibility or achieveability. It's so easy to be a lazy novice when you know the end point is so far away. And it's so easy to feel defeated and depressed by that thought as well. I started to subconsciously compare myself to what I wanted to be: Gaming greats like Hideo Kojima and Cliff Blezinski. Yes I know I don't actually compare, but inside, I would see myself as being less passionate than I thought, while they got to be in the right place at the right time!
Relevation came to me when I realised that, well obviously, they weren't born that way. Or more importantly, they weren't giving themselves unrealistic goals as part of a big guiding plan or a "Dream." The most respected and successful game developers simply did what they loved when they discovered what they loved and when it was bad they simply made it the best kind of bad and kept going to make it better.
For a lot of the vets here all this will be obvious, they've figured it out. But for me this has been a weight off of my shoulders. No matter what I do from now on, it is a step in the right direction.
Oh and thank you Polycount for being the kind of fantastic community that (while bitching endlessly about the state of the industry), makes me feel like a part of it, and keeps me coming back.
I too have this "Dream" I won't tell you my life story, you've all heard it before. I will say that if you ask me what I want to do with my life I would exclaim that, "I want to make video games!" Just like a small child. I don't really have anything to boast for what little of my efforts though, yet I find no other life-choice appealing. How could one want to do so many great things and yet struggle to perform them?
Well if you are powered by this strange calling and you know it, and you are a fresh-un with no experience or skill to learn from, well good, you have something that will always be there for you, and I hope you never lose it.
BUT PLEASE PUT IT AWAY. Don't think about it and don't talk about it. Don't look at it for inspiration, and don't let it be held above you like a carrot on a stick.
Just do what comes naturally, just do what you love. If you love making games then go and do it. Don't think about your career and the industry and what part of it 'fits' into your Dream.
*EDIT* Actually I should restate that I am in no way establishing that somebody should disregard or throw away their dream to be somehow more productive. I still have mine and I know it, and it gives me a sense of purpose. I'm simply not using it as point of reference or reflection of what I have done/not done. *EDIT*
For me it was bringing me down. I knew what I wanted to be and what I wanted to do when I became it, but for me it was a lofty future with no connecting strings of possibility or achieveability. It's so easy to be a lazy novice when you know the end point is so far away. And it's so easy to feel defeated and depressed by that thought as well. I started to subconsciously compare myself to what I wanted to be: Gaming greats like Hideo Kojima and Cliff Blezinski. Yes I know I don't actually compare, but inside, I would see myself as being less passionate than I thought, while they got to be in the right place at the right time!
Relevation came to me when I realised that, well obviously, they weren't born that way. Or more importantly, they weren't giving themselves unrealistic goals as part of a big guiding plan or a "Dream." The most respected and successful game developers simply did what they loved when they discovered what they loved and when it was bad they simply made it the best kind of bad and kept going to make it better.
For a lot of the vets here all this will be obvious, they've figured it out. But for me this has been a weight off of my shoulders. No matter what I do from now on, it is a step in the right direction.
Oh and thank you Polycount for being the kind of fantastic community that (while bitching endlessly about the state of the industry), makes me feel like a part of it, and keeps me coming back.
Replies
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Coming from someone who've made both 3d mmo's and 2d mmo's I can say that it is by far easier to make 2d mmo's. However, I see your point of the story is the naivet
I've been reusing and improving my code for loading collada files and flac and other files for the past few years. Before that I just made tools for modding games like halo 3.
Generally I go and see what makes a game tick before I go try to imitate. Hex Workshop is probably the most used tool on my computer at this point.
That and notepad++.
Once I knocked some sense back into my self I have been enjoying making art because it's what I love to do. When you work on something you love and try your best, it will show and everything else will fall into place.
Well I'll be humble and admit that I used to be this kind of person. Although I was never dumb enough to think that one could start their career in such a position.
As I was ruminating on all this I was wondering how I was making so little progress now, when back in High School I had less time for everything than I do now and yet I still managed to have enough time to: play all my games, socialise, do schoolwork, do work, AND do my game dev stuff. So now it is so simple: I didn't care and had nobody to answer to for my position in life, especially in relation to that big 'dream.' I couldn't disappoint the future me yet and so I just did what made sense to me at the time.
Not that you're wrong... but it's like so many other Big Realizations in life. You really have to figure it out for yourself for it to be worth anything. There's a lot of personal growth that happens as we realize this. You can't just read a forum post and jump past that and end up with the same knowledge and awareness that having that realization includes.
Ferg
I totally get where you're coming from, I realise that it would take a lot more than my post to really give somebody that frame of mind. Of course there are many things one can learn through their own experiences, and yet as a people we continue to impart to others knowledge and lessons we have gained ourselves.
SupRore
It's good to see you have a handle on your passions. I admit that my original post was brash, I don't think people should throw their dreams away. I was trying to say that people shouldn't lean on them like a crutch. This is an art-focused forum and I know that for pure artists my discovery would be less useful. A committed and determined artist would already find strength in their art, whereas for many designers (especially the young dreamers) it is all a means to an end: An end that may never come.
Most important thing is being able to prototype your ideas, you don't know whether an idea is fun until you test it.
If your not passionate enough about your dream to really do the research into what it is all about and what it will take to make that dream a reality why should anyone care that you never achieve your dream?
Except I wanted to create a virtual world where I could bone chicks 24/7. Dream still has not been realized
Erm a third of halfbrick is game designers. They are neither artists or programmers. Nor are they in lead positions.
It is a completely different skill set. Do you expect an artist or programmer to have the skill set to design low level game mechanics?
on the other hand. I don't agree that you should look at your dream with a "Just do what you love" mindset.
once you've set your sights on what you need to do. you MUST be disciplined about how you do it.
I could spend all my time sculpting in Zbrush, designing my own characters and thinking I was working towards my goal. But in order to grow, you must make yourself uncomfortable, and challenge yourself.
This means doing thing you don't want to do, and having the integrity to do them every time you practice in order to grow.
I never said that doing what you love meant only what elicits joy at the present moment. Would you say that those things you didn't like doing were so bad they ruined the worth of game dev/game art for you? I wouldn't assume so. On the whole people could be doing what they love even if there is difficult challenges to overcome. For me I couldn't enjoy anything at the time because no matter what I was a disappointment to myself for not achieving one of my most important goals.
There are many insights here I never considered when I wrote the topic and think I should try to better clarify its message.
If you have a dream, I'd say chase it, chase it til you fall down of exhaustion, because that is what most of us do. That's exactly how you realize your dream.
You have your destiny and you have your fate.
If your destiny is to be a game-developer you'll have to fight your way to that dream, if you somehow give up a long the way, then that's your fate. It's up to you whether you realize it or not.
Um... yeah this exactly. I came to this realization myself a few months ago when a friend said to me, "Sounds like you don't enjoy doing this. You should really just be doing something you love to do. If you do that, a job will come, but that's not the point. The point is doing what you love." (or something to that extent)
That's when I realized I hated working on my portfolio, doing art, simply for the sake of getting another piece added on to my portfolio for a job. Since then, I've been enjoying animating a lot more, and it's been much easier to get work done.
I still believe in my dreams, but I've come to realize the hard work needs to be put in, but work that at the end of the day I enjoyed doing.
Also, love that scene from Tangled!!