Here's a scene I'm currently working on for a class project. The lighting isn't complete and there's some issues with the meshes. Any feedback would be greatly appreciated!
I did a quick paintover here
I think you could stand to give the skull a few more tris to enchance the silhouette, and the ladder needs to be shrunken down a lot to make the scene make sense (That overhang highlighted in red wouldn't make sense to when compared to the size of the ladder, because it would have no point), and overall enhance the contrast of the scene. The orangish light is there to offset the overly cool color scheme of the scene, and make the skull pop a little more and to add a sense of depth missing from the original.
But otherwise, looking good so far.
Thanks guys for your advice. I'm following a concept art, that I should have uploaded earlier. We're basically supposed to make it as close as possible, especially in regards to lighting.
The biggest problem with the way you built the scene is that you broke the composition by pulling the skull outside of the focal point (the light shaft) so you ended up with two competing points of interest right next to eachother.
Less important but you also didn't make the scene deep enough for the lines in the scene to direct the viewer to the focal point.
Here's the updated lighting and with the consideration of trying to lead the eye to the skull. I have about a week and a half left to finish it so any advice is much appreciated. Thanks!
did a reaaally quick retouch, its far from perfect, but i think hints out the worst flaws.
(though dont take my word for it, i am no pro )
U need to add thoe rocks in the foreground, they somehow are a little bit like vignetting, turning the eye towards the middle of the pic.
Its way too blue!
The light on the wall on the left makes no sense and draws the eye away from the entrance.
The ladder is too big.
Also your asset's proportions dont match with those of the concept, but thats another point.
You may want to change your camera's setting, too.
Some lens distortion would add to the depth of the cave.
If you have time I would recommend revisiting the skull. it is the hero prop in your scene and should catch the eye. right now the texture is really blurry and does not resemble the concept at all.
I hope you arent offended, its a lot of crits, but that just came to my mind...
Dont take it too serious:thumbup:
Right now you've lost a lot of the coolness of the scene because the composition has been weakened due to everything being out of scale/proportion.
You should always work and refer back to the original concept and make sure that your model aligns with it as best as possible. This is especially important when beginning a new scene, so that you lay down a good base/foundation to build on top of, and know that everything will fit properly.
All that said, it's not bad! It's just not the concept, but you're still making progress and hopefully learning from it, which is the most important thing.
red lines split the image into 9 equal areas, making reference to center, top, left, bottom right, etc. easier, and links into some image/psychology stuff (iirc)
Yellow lines are perspective.
purple lines is my attempt to outline the staircase around the skull
brown/orange lines indicate the important lines around the opening of the ruins/tomb.
ANALYSIS:
the skull and interesting lighting situation around it immediately pull the viewer's attenting to the right side of the image, although our eyes slowely follow the perspective lines outward from the focal point.
purple stairs around the skull are limited to the direct vicinity of said skull, as the explorer came down the ladder behind the skull, and on the far side of the hole in the ceiling.
The hole in the ceiling appears to be eliptical or oval at best with the skull being under the opening with enough space for the tree to grow to the size in the picture and provide a good amount of shade.
Another part i failed to highlight is the light on thr ground and on the water. The shafts of light are clearly visible, but more importantly, some shafts are in front of the skull, and the light also falls on the concrete infront of the stairs/pedestal upon which the skull rests.
Simply put, the skull is directly under the hole in the ceiling as the area infront of the skull receives direct light from the area above.
any yellow or green colour in the concept is the direct result of the light from above reflecting/refracting off/through the murky algae-infested(?) waters, creating te interesting yellow/green light source.
colour splotches on the lower left corner are just samples of the light shafts, and the water + bounced light
Well, first of all! Its great work and beyond the stuff I'm doing.
However, here are the little things I would like to point out. This is also my first feedback on such a more developed piece:
The green arrows point out spots where the texture is repeating itself in a way the player might spot. You see, it has this patch of moss over and over again.
The red area has some barely visible glyphs on the concept art. Some ancient writings or other decorative stuff would look really cool on there.
the grey arrow: Points out the blurry texture of the skull. I don't know if it is intended but I think it could use a bit more detail. The rock textures on the ceiling aswell, by the way. They look a bit "glued" to it, but that might be just me.
What is the actual idea behind the giant skull with the glowing eyes?
the blue arrow points on the ceiling... you have these plants/moss/whatever growing down the wall and this looks totally great, but wouldn't there be some moss on the ceiling aswell? Or a few cracks...because the floor looks much dirtyer than the ceiling which looks way too clean to me. If I would have your skill, I would start by adding some cracks to the ceilingpanels where the rocks are already showing up, and maybe place a few panels on the floor that fell down
That would be it... sorry for my bad english and keep up the impressive work,dude!
the texture on the stones on the left is waay to blurry (same as on the skull)
you did not change the stairs and forgot some stone in the right lower corner
the stone ceiling looks better now, though there is no texture applied to it yet, is it?
also you might want to check your smoothing groups...
i think the specularity on the trunk makes it look like plastic, also you might want to branch out the roots a lot more, creating that viny creeping look.
the left wall is a little overexposed for my taste...
Replies
I think you could stand to give the skull a few more tris to enchance the silhouette, and the ladder needs to be shrunken down a lot to make the scene make sense (That overhang highlighted in red wouldn't make sense to when compared to the size of the ladder, because it would have no point), and overall enhance the contrast of the scene. The orangish light is there to offset the overly cool color scheme of the scene, and make the skull pop a little more and to add a sense of depth missing from the original.
But otherwise, looking good so far.
Less important but you also didn't make the scene deep enough for the lines in the scene to direct the viewer to the focal point.
(though dont take my word for it, i am no pro
U need to add thoe rocks in the foreground, they somehow are a little bit like vignetting, turning the eye towards the middle of the pic.
Its way too blue!
The light on the wall on the left makes no sense and draws the eye away from the entrance.
The ladder is too big.
Also your asset's proportions dont match with those of the concept, but thats another point.
You may want to change your camera's setting, too.
Some lens distortion would add to the depth of the cave.
If you have time I would recommend revisiting the skull. it is the hero prop in your scene and should catch the eye. right now the texture is really blurry and does not resemble the concept at all.
I hope you arent offended, its a lot of crits, but that just came to my mind...
Dont take it too serious:thumbup:
You should always work and refer back to the original concept and make sure that your model aligns with it as best as possible. This is especially important when beginning a new scene, so that you lay down a good base/foundation to build on top of, and know that everything will fit properly.
All that said, it's not bad! It's just not the concept, but you're still making progress and hopefully learning from it, which is the most important thing.
Keep it up!
red lines split the image into 9 equal areas, making reference to center, top, left, bottom right, etc. easier, and links into some image/psychology stuff (iirc)
Yellow lines are perspective.
purple lines is my attempt to outline the staircase around the skull
brown/orange lines indicate the important lines around the opening of the ruins/tomb.
ANALYSIS:
the skull and interesting lighting situation around it immediately pull the viewer's attenting to the right side of the image, although our eyes slowely follow the perspective lines outward from the focal point.
purple stairs around the skull are limited to the direct vicinity of said skull, as the explorer came down the ladder behind the skull, and on the far side of the hole in the ceiling.
The hole in the ceiling appears to be eliptical or oval at best with the skull being under the opening with enough space for the tree to grow to the size in the picture and provide a good amount of shade.
Another part i failed to highlight is the light on thr ground and on the water. The shafts of light are clearly visible, but more importantly, some shafts are in front of the skull, and the light also falls on the concrete infront of the stairs/pedestal upon which the skull rests.
Simply put, the skull is directly under the hole in the ceiling as the area infront of the skull receives direct light from the area above.
any yellow or green colour in the concept is the direct result of the light from above reflecting/refracting off/through the murky algae-infested(?) waters, creating te interesting yellow/green light source.
colour splotches on the lower left corner are just samples of the light shafts, and the water + bounced light
However, here are the little things I would like to point out. This is also my first feedback on such a more developed piece:
The green arrows point out spots where the texture is repeating itself in a way the player might spot. You see, it has this patch of moss over and over again.
The red area has some barely visible glyphs on the concept art. Some ancient writings or other decorative stuff would look really cool on there.
the grey arrow: Points out the blurry texture of the skull. I don't know if it is intended but I think it could use a bit more detail. The rock textures on the ceiling aswell, by the way. They look a bit "glued" to it, but that might be just me.
What is the actual idea behind the giant skull with the glowing eyes?
the blue arrow points on the ceiling... you have these plants/moss/whatever growing down the wall and this looks totally great, but wouldn't there be some moss on the ceiling aswell? Or a few cracks...because the floor looks much dirtyer than the ceiling which looks way too clean to me. If I would have your skill, I would start by adding some cracks to the ceilingpanels where the rocks are already showing up, and maybe place a few panels on the floor that fell down
That would be it... sorry for my bad english and keep up the impressive work,dude!
-Serygala
you did not change the stairs and forgot some stone in the right lower corner
the stone ceiling looks better now, though there is no texture applied to it yet, is it?
also you might want to check your smoothing groups...
i think the specularity on the trunk makes it look like plastic, also you might want to branch out the roots a lot more, creating that viny creeping look.
the left wall is a little overexposed for my taste...