This is a maxscript I'm currently working on. If somebody wants to beta test, contact me via PM saying how much are you willing to pay. If you get it now, you will get it for free when its released.
[ame]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XJqVBVdT-I0[/ame]
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But I have a solution for this, it will make it retain the original topology and shape of both objects and just will connect them in a way that will produce all quads.
I will make a video when it's ready and working.