random message for the day

rolfness · Sep 2009

I woke up this morning and was taking a slash my son who is 9 months crawls into the bathroom and sees me and thinks its hillarious that theres a stream of water is coming our of my weiner. He pulls himself up on to the side of the toilet to watch me pee. hilarious kids are awesome

Andreas · Sep 2009

Thanks for that.

Rumkugel · Sep 2009

I called the cops. Just in case.

Muzzoid · Sep 2009

lol... imagine the stories you will have to tell at his 21st!

Rumkugel · Sep 2009

" remember son you were wondering why theres water coming out of my wiener"

imagine that during the wedding speech.

that´ll freak me out!

rolfness · Sep 2009

Blenderhead wrote: »

Thanks for that.

hahah you're most welcome!

Ive got some awesome videos of hi farting that Im going to save for his wedding night

innervision961 · Sep 2009

your avatar increases the creepiness of this thread ten fold. :poly115:

Firebert · Sep 2009

a couple years ago, a friend of mine was "potty training" his son. well, you know, they need some help. their sense of aim and accuracy isn't well developed. so after a while, his son looks at him and says, "daddy, don't touch my penis.".

Disco Stu · Sep 2009

[ame="

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=blHneDDQx0E"]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vJCRNXUngAM[/ame]

rolfness · Sep 2009

Firebert wrote: »

a couple years ago, a friend of mine was "potty training" his son. well, you know, they need some help. their sense of aim and accuracy isn't well developed. so after a while, his son looks at him and says, "daddy, don't touch my penis.".

LOOOL

Mark Dygert · Sep 2009

Firebert wrote: »

a couple years ago, a friend of mine was "potty training" his son. well, you know, they need some help. their sense of aim and accuracy isn't well developed. so after a while, his son looks at him and says, "daddy, don't touch my penis.".

Then stop peeing on my floor!

Phew so glad little girls are easier to potty train, no weird wiener grabbing involved. Also, gotta go? Sit down. I guess you can do that with boys but then they probably get beat up once they're in school...

danshewan · Sep 2009

Vig wrote: »

Also, gotta go? Sit down. I guess you can do that with boys but then they probably get beat up once they're in school...

Apparently, 40% of Japanese men sit down to pee.

http://www.japanprobe.com/?p=3373

Hard-hitting journalism, indeed.

Justin Meisse · Sep 2009

cute story but what about splash back?

rolfness · Sep 2009

I sat down to pee once.. only because I was too drunk to stand upbut I was also too drunk to remember to pull down my underpants.. there was no splashback

Psyk0 · Sep 2009

Fun fact, in college i knew a guy that wiped his ass back to front...yes...that's right...he went under his junk! XD

aesir · Sep 2009

Psyk0 wrote: »

Fun fact, in college i knew a guy that wiped his ass back to front...yes...that's right...he went under his junk! XD

Dude, you have to go both directions, alternating. You're missing out if you think you can get it all going in the same direction.

Lamont · Sep 2009

danshewan wrote: »

Apparently, 40% of Japanese men sit down to pee.

http://www.japanprobe.com/?p=3373

Hard-hitting journalism, indeed.

Yeah, because a bunch of places still have WC's like this:

Japanese%20style%20toilet.jpg

Since I am in a small town, there's a lot of them like this.

NyneDown · Sep 2009

SooO, do you sit Indian style to take a pooper? I wouldnt know what to do if I came across one of those...

Lamont · Sep 2009

NyneDown wrote: »

SooO, do you sit Indian style to take a pooper? I wouldnt know what to do if I came across one of those...

You don't actually go in those. Usually there's a bucket in the bedrooms, living/common area. You go in the bucket, wipe and take it to one of those and pour it in. For older restaurants, you go to a small room, do your thing, wipe walk down the hall and pour it in. Then go wash your hands. If it's late at night and you don't wanna get up, you can just go in the bucket, close the lid and wait till morning. Just pray you are the first to use it.

Oh, and there's a small covered wastebasket for women to put the tampons/pads/baby diapers. Don't open that. Really.

amadeux · Sep 2009

this thread is a little wakky, but some things Im rather familiar with.

one day Im just sitting on the couch watchin TV when my 2 year old points a bubble gun at me and goes pew pew pew! which then I realized he had put a roll of poo in the muzzel end of the gun...

Ruz · Sep 2009

ha ha my cat does that. i am taking a pee and looking down this little head appears, kind of between my legs., looking up. almost peed on her by mistake:)
The other cat is fascinated by the toilet flush and actually checks to see where the water goes to.

Lamont · Sep 2009

walknTalknMonkey wrote: »

one day Im just sitting on the couch watchin TV when my 2 year old points a bubble gun at me and goes pew pew pew! which then I realized he had put a roll of poo in the muzzel end of the gun...

Lucky for you he had the safety on.

t4paN · Sep 2009

Lamont wrote: »

Yeah, because a bunch of places still have WC's like this:

Since I am in a small town, there's a lot of them like this.

We actually had those in the army (we serve a mandatory year in Greece). Although I could never get used to squatting in my civilian life (for whatever reason - eg fixing cables under my desk etc) after a year of shitting like that I could squat like a pro. Now I'm back to feeling old and weak in the knees.

Andreas · Sep 2009

aesir wrote: »

Dude, you have to go both directions, alternating. You're missing out if you think you can get it all going in the same direction.

lol oh god.

Yep, I can attest to the existence of toilets like that in Greece. Used to have em in school. Tried to use em as little as possible. Apparently its good for you to use that kind though...one of the causes of hemmorhoids is because we dont squat when we poop.

rolfness · Sep 2009

Lamont wrote: »

Yeah, because a bunch of places still have WC's like this:

Since I am in a small town, there's a lot of them like this.

These kinds of toilets are to be fond all over asia, and they take alot of getting used to, especially if you got your jeans bunched round your ankles. I know someone that fell backwards and had thier ass jammed into the hole. And they are better for you apparently you dont get nuggets left in the bowel as you do with the western sitting on the throne" kind.

Lamont · Sep 2009

I thought wiping your ass too rough is a cause of the 'roids?

low odor · Sep 2009

Captain Anus says: "Baby Wipes are the key to a healthy butthole."

Chunkey · Sep 2009

Ah that's where I'm going wrong.... been walking around like John Wayne without his horse for the last fortnight...

rolfness · Sep 2009

Chunkey wrote: »

Ah that's where I'm going wrong.... been walking around like John Wayne without his horse for the last fortnight...

LMFAO

JohnnySix · Sep 2009

Squat for win - seriously you can squeeze out something a foot long squatting, and be done in 20 seconds flat, no more 20 minutes reading the paper waiting for something to fall out.

achillesian · Sep 2009

Andreas · Sep 2009

JohnnySix wrote: »

Squat for win - seriously you can squeeze out something a foot long squatting, and be done in 20 seconds flat, no more 20 minutes reading the paper waiting for something to fall out.

So what do you do? Stand on the seat or something? lol

c0ldhands · Sep 2009

do you ppl sometimes pee in two directions at the same time,you know like a water hose spraying in two directions. I hate it when it happends...cant control that shit.Just thought I might share this, youre welcome polycount.