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Is this good animation?

ghalgaryth
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ghalgaryth
I am creating an animated series that I plan to get on TV. Please have a look and let me know what you think. Any advice or crits are much appreciated. Thanks so much.

http://www.youtube.com/view_play_list?p=7B1C17F82A7C84BB
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  • Smirnoffka
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    Smirnoffka polycounter lvl 17
    I dunno if its what I would watch on television, but I did enjoy the humour, and I think there is some potential there.
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  • Ben Apuna
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    Ben Apuna
    That's some really niche humor you've got there, I kind of liked it. There were times when I got the joke far before it really ended, maybe the pace could be increased somehow. Good luck with your goal of getting it on TV though I'm not sure if TV is the right market for Dungeon Force as it is right now.

    On a side note it sort of reminded me of Knights of the Dinner Table [ame]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HmzWd0eik44[/ame]
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  • larolaro
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    larolaro polycounter lvl 9
    It was kinda funny, too many long sections of nothing though.

    Alot of the humour seems to be along the lines of family guy, lots of the same eye movements, situations of awkward pauses and gestures. Even the main guy looks like he's been taken straight out of family guy and given some wizards gear.
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  • rooster
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    rooster mod
    yeah pretty funny man, which is a big accomplishment already :)
    like ben says one or two times you could see the joke coming. sometimes thats funny, and you can play around with when the punchline is finally delivered- I think you have another oportunity though to set up an obvious joke and play with the expectations of the viewer- turn it on its head somehow

    I'd watch more though
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  • PeterK
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    PeterK greentooth
    I watched them all and I laughed several times. They're enjoyable and I hope you keep making them.
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  • rlove
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    rlove polycounter lvl 7
    yes yes i like it, lots of potential here for sure. keep working on it.

    -love
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  • warby
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    warby polycounter lvl 18
    only 2 crits : make your actors speak up a little and make your title sequence shorter.

    i laughed out loud multiple times
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  • Andreas
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    Andreas polycounter lvl 11
    Very funny. The animation isn't great, but I think it suits it (kinda like several Adult Swim series).I thought part 4 was poor though. The rest were funny. Can't wait to see more!
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  • imb3nt
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    imb3nt polycounter lvl 14
    Agreed, i thought it was pretty cool. Looking forward to seeing more.
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  • JasonLavoie
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    JasonLavoie polycounter lvl 18
    Straight up love it... "Hey guys... look... ima babeeh... ima beebeehh".

    Good luck man :)

    "nice balls" reminds me of stuff from tim and erik... you a fan?
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  • Matroskin
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    Matroskin polycounter lvl 11
    yep, very funny stuff, i loved it :)
    Nice voiceacting ;)
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  • konstruct
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    konstruct polycounter lvl 18
    Im a fan- although I felt the series got weaker as it went along. there were some parts like the huuuuge list of wizard that seemed kind of out of place / not funny-

    I agree with RobG about the family guy stuff too-
    the music was one of my favorite parts.
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  • ghalgaryth
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    ghalgaryth
    Thanks for the replies everyone.

    JasonLavoie: Glad you liked it. Yeah, I am a big Tim and Eric fan. It's funny that a lot of people compare my stuff to family guy. Tim and Eric has had a much bigger impact on my work.

    Blenderhead: Part 4 not so good? I hear you. If I end up putting them together into a film I will work on that part.

    warby: I will make the titles shorter on the next one. About the actors speaking up...that's a good point. A lot of stuff on TV goes too far, imo...so maybe I have overcompensated with my desire to not have it come off as "jokey" and loud.

    Rooster: If you have examples of what jokes are obvious before the punchline I would love to hear. I try to be aware of that as much as I can...but I don't catch everything.

    RobG: Family guy, huh? Oh man. That's tough to hear...lol.
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  • t4paN
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    t4paN polycounter lvl 10
    Oh come on man, Family Guy is awesome! And I agree with Rob it is a bit similar but very original in the setting and characters (from what I've seen anyway). Can't wait for episode 6!
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  • Snowfly
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    Snowfly polycounter lvl 18
    The intros are my favorite parts! I actually enjoyed the list of wizards, with the orator and his prissy voice, although I agree there wasn't anything funny abou the writing itself...it just keeps laying mild silliness on you til you can't help but laugh

    I can't stop watching the barbarian! :)

    The music is great, did you perform that yourself?
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  • John Warner
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    John Warner polycounter lvl 18
    Awesome man! really funny shit.
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  • Pseudo
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    Pseudo polycounter lvl 18
    Being compared to a show as incredibly successful as Family Guy is hardly a bad thing...
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  • r4ptur3
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    r4ptur3 polycounter lvl 10
    keep making more -- they rock man :)
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  • JasonLavoie
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    JasonLavoie polycounter lvl 18
    Please... please bring back that little goblin, I can't stop laughing at that guy!
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  • ghalgaryth
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    ghalgaryth
    JasonLavoie: Lol. Nice avatar! Thanks a lot.

    Pseudo: That's very true. In fact it is an honor to be compared to Family Guy. I may not watch the show, but I do have a lot of respect for Seth Mcfarlane and the success he has built with FG.

    John Warner: That means a lot, John. Btw, good luck with Raycatcher. I hope you sell millions of copies.

    Snowfly: Yeah, the music is mine. I am an artist first, so it was a real struggle to make music I was happy with. I'm glad to hear you like it.
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  • Art-Machine
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    Art-Machine
    I would advise against having family guy looking characters if you really want this on TV. You want to find your own style or you'll just be scoffed as a copycat. That wizard guy really is distracting in his family-guy-ness and in fact doesn't match anyone else in the world so far. I would really look at redesigning him to be more in your own style, as well as putting focus on making a unified style throughout. All things that will come with time i suppose.

    Also, something that'll help a lot of those "too long" moments : throw in more close ups of whoever's talking once in a while, just to keep the eyes entertained for those longer parts. Alternatively, you can focus on the person being spoken to, giving them funny facial expressions (sarcasm, impatience, whatever) to play off what's being said to them so there's more of a 2 person dynamic.

    *edit* i see in the later episodes, you did start doing that more, cool.
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  • Bulls_eye
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    Bulls_eye
    this stuff is so funny, I think your audience watches Adult Swim on Cartoon Network, its your dialogue, and odd use of characters that keep the show fresh and funny. your animation doesn't have to be good. I would definitely watch this on T.V. if it aired.
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  • onionhead_o
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    onionhead_o polycounter lvl 16
    nice i like it. the theme song is pretty catchy.
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  • Mark Dygert
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    Mark Dygert mod
    I laughed pretty good at some points, like when he picks up the goblin on a stick. I also find it pretty funny how much leg the wizard reveals when he bends down. It does feel like you're playing the death card a little too often but you did bring Toby back so...

    So far I really like it I hope you do a lot more.
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  • ALPHAwolf
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    ALPHAwolf polycounter lvl 18
    HAHAHA

    very cool.
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