Job apps and emotional rollercoasters
polycounter lvl 18
Does anyone else get too emotionally involved with job apps when looking for a job? I don't mean like McDonalds jobs, but like your first game industry gig, or if not your first, maybe a studio that you've always wanted to work for. I have a bad tendancy to get far too wrapped up in wanting to work somewhere when I hear something back from a company. I find myself day dreaming about living where ever said company is, about what the people and the work will be like. Then theres the crash as I either don't hear anything back after the initial response, or just flat out get rejected. Fortunatly for me I recover quickly, and I understand rejection and dealing with it is a big part of growing as an artist. Still it would make the job search far less stressful if I could just be emotionally detatched from these things. Then again is that just the nature of passion?
Replies
kp said it.. you are simply clinging to the reality you are creating in your head.. and you are missing out all the fun and potential by not wanting to let go from your "illusion"
the more you elaborate that reality, "experiencing" it in your own mind you build up more emotions and that leads to more stress.. more WHAT IF the whole pyramid collapses down on itself? that point, which is not under your control, scares you.. you're simply afraid to deal with whatever reality may come instead, which is a perfectly natural tendancy, i suppose.
indeed, as kp said, if you openly are willing to accept and embrace ANY thing that may come, without judging it for being good or bad, you can MAKE IT good as you will instatly see it for it's fullest potential. the possibilities of what u can do with it are there, you are simply not seeing them. your vision is blocked, something in your psychology is leading your thought-way elsewhere, diverting it from a pure-er observation.
who knows, maybe just then it will disappear and you'll go back to where you came from, posivitely suprised, perhaps, but now you have the knowledge of the other in your hands and the possibilities become even wider. had you reacted in anger (or other emotion) and rejected the 'other', you would ended up with nothing new, innit?
it's all a matter of perspective my friend..
simply put - you shouldn't think that the job will make your life any better, because it should already be as good as it can be.. as good as you make it. live this moment, not the illusion.
hey and don't run off orlando before i see you eh?
Also you might post of an apllication or email it and some HR who knows sod all about art or games just ignores it because she is busy gossiping about whatever.
End of the day when you are good enough you will break through, just stick with it. It took me 5 years to get in and I have been in the industry 2 years now. It can be a long painful process and only the most bloody minded make it.
Then when you get in its another long painful process to get accepted and become good/consistent.
just depends how badly you want it really
Take that how you will.
Instead of saying, "OK, how they respond is how I'm going to think of my worth as an artist," which is a common trap for that kind of application, I basically made myself a challenge, on my own terms, to really push certain concrete goals with the portfolio. I wanted to do complete scenes, not just isolated designs on a blank background... and that was a goal I accomplished. It was an official application to Valve, but on emotional terms, it was a completely self-contained venture: I set out to challenge myself to better quality art, and I succeeded. So the emotional payoff was when I finished the portfolio work, not when I heard back about my application (which I basically didn't). If I had invested anything more emotionally in Valve's response, I'd still be left hanging now, months later. Not that I wouldn't have been completely stoked to hear back from them, obviously, but I had absolutely zero invested in the possibility. I strongly recommend doing the same: it takes all the emotional rollercoaster nonsense out of the equation
I was exactly like you, and soon realised that quite often its not cause you are not good enough, just that that company might not be looking for what you have got to offer.
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Easier said than done. it wasn't too long ago that i was looking for work. it sucks. i hate looking for work. i hate getting my hopes up.
I think this last year has taught me alot...maybe next time I won't wear my heart on my sleeve.
We just fired some people...or 'let them go'. We're also actively hiring and they know that...so that's gotta hurt. there is nothing worse than having just finished a project and then needing to look for work *ouch*
-R
Either be ready for rejection, or spend the time/effort to get good enough that no one will reject you.
Take that how you will.
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I figure sinister is pretty much on point with this, but I've gotta follow on that second part.
I mentioned in Adam's "how's your life" thread that mine ain't all that and a bag of chips right now. That's largely because I've wasted sooooo much time trying to be 'perfect' and eliminate any chance of rejection. Believe me when I tell you that this is a bad idea. In short, you'll never hit that point with *anything* in life, but you will waste an amazing amount of time and energy in trying. Failing sucks. I detest failure so much that I won't even play friendly games that I think I will probably lose. Not at all a good attitude, and it's caused me to miss out on a lot of potential great things in life - girls I didn't ask out, jobs I didn't apply for, trips I didn't take, etc. My point (I have one!) is that the consequences of failure, the disappointment and disillusionment of coming up short, are better than the consequences of not even trying or 'waiting' to try.
Cthogua, it's definitely a situation in which you sort of just have to close your eyes and jump. What I have found often helps me is to start making a 'backup' plan right as soon as my main goal is set. No matter how badly you want a particular gig, as soon as that application is out the door, treat it like you've already been rejected and move on to finding and applying for another job. It's a modern perspective on the samurai notion of living each day as if you're already dead - if in your mind you've already accepted that you will 'fail', you can proceed without fear of any specific consequence. And to step sideways with my philosophy, a fundamental tenet of Buddhism is that all suffering in life is caused by desire and attachment. Experiment with different approaches to help you 'let go' and dealing with possible rejections will become easier.
This is easier said than done
If you are really trying and you know you have done everything in your power to work there but you still get rejected, then dont feel bad,that just means you are not at the level you need to be at the moment,dust yourself off and keep trying.
Life is a crazy (and I mean REALLY CRAZY) place to be, check it out.