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Woman/ women troubles

Grafox
polycounter lvl 18
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Grafox polycounter lvl 18
I never thought I would get myself into this kind of situation, but alas, here I am.

Here's the deal. About 3 years ago I met this wonderfull girl and we fell in love. All went well and we had the time of our lives. But then fate struck, about a year ago she went to study abroad and we broke up because we are no good at longdistance relationships (we tried for severall weeks). We became good friends.

So I fell into this black hole of lonelyness untill last summer. I met this really cool and sweet girl and I developed feelings for her. We have now been together for about 2 months.

Here comes my problem:

My ex-girlfriend moved back to the Netherlands and the problem is that whenever I see her I still have feelings towards her and I think she has the same. She is currently also in a relationship. I really like my present girlfriend but I just can't forget my ex. I am torn, because I really don't wan't to break her heart but I still desire my ex.
I am really confused on what I should do. confused.gif
Buwha, I am going insane!!

Replies

  • Toomas
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    Toomas polycounter lvl 18
    Maybe they both are really open minded wink.gif

    Seriously tho you should talk to your ex and see if she still has strong feelings for you (and not nostalgia that will wear off soon).
    Anyways the more you wait with your decision the worse someone is going to get hurt.

    Good luck
  • Mojo2k
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    Mojo2k polycounter lvl 18
    punch your ex in the nose, i know it will be hard to do, but after that she will get a restraining order or at least hate you a whole lot, and since you won't have a chance with her things will blossome with your new peach!

    but more seriously its a tricky situation, did you know she was only gong to be gone for a bit of time, you should have just waited good luck
  • Grafox
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    Grafox polycounter lvl 18
    Toomas: That's true, the more I wait, the worse some is going to get hurt, that's why I am trying to really think this over.
    If I knew that she would be back within the year (she stopped studying abroad)I wouldn't have started something with someone else.

    Bah life's a bitch :S
  • moose
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    moose polycount sponsor
  • Kahlan
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    Kahlan polycounter lvl 18
    Grafox,

    Here's a girls point of view. You fell in love but you couldn't maintain a long distance relationship (for a whole whopping year)? Okay. Chalk that up to immaturity or something. Then you meet someone else to fill that 'void' in your life. Great. Now the original girl comes back and you're torn between the two ladies. It sounds like to me that you (a) don't know what love is (b) are afraid of being alone. You shouldn't date anyone unless you feel confident in your own self-worth.

    Don't get me wrong. I sympathize with your predicament. There are two wonderful girls that you would like to be with. What you need to do is sit down and decide what you want. You obviously don't know. Don't drag your current girl around. She REALLY won't appreciate that. Make a decision and be honest with her. But if you decide to stay with her be a bit tactful and while letting her know of your initial confusion don't go so far as to mention your idea of switching her out for your ex. (Don't lie, lies come back to haunt you) If you choose to stay with her make sure you tell her how she is the person you want to be with and how you are sorry for any hurt you caused her with your confusion. That will make her less distrustful of you in the future.

    If you choose to pursue your ex realize that she is also in a new relationship and be prepared for the trouble this will cause. I'm not saying 'don't do it', if you think this is the best course of action. But it will be more difficult. Don't be cocky either, maybe she's perfectly content in her new relationship. Try to have some tact in any case. And...good luck, choose with your heart.

    Kahlan
  • Mojo2k
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    Mojo2k polycounter lvl 18
    yeah, if you coudnt manage longdistance for more than a few weeks, it was not love anyways,
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