All Gone - Abandoned Interior Environment (critique needed)

NikDemidko

Hi everyone!

Your eyes and opinions needed, before I call it finished.

How can I make it better?
What ir lacks?
Is it somewhere near being industry ready portfolio piece? If it's not - what areas should I be focusing on?





Any critique is much appreciated.

srinivasjlkm

Overall looks nice.
I think maybe some subtle dust could be helpful, since its abandon. and has a little broken ceiling ,furniture.
Not a pro here - so im just saying.

NikDemidko

srinivasjlkm said:

Overall looks nice.
I think maybe some subtle dust could be helpful, since its abandon. and has a little broken ceiling ,furniture.
Not a pro here - so im just saying.

Thank you for the idea. That might work, I should give it a try

teodar23

There is some inconsistency with the lighting. Im guessing its dynamic and you added some fill lights in some places but not in others.
The ivy positioning is a bit odd, where does it come from, how would it have grown in the stairwell.
The grunge is also inconsistent and at least for the cabinets it looks like mud. Unless they sat outside for a while then they were placed inside, it doesnt make sense.

hghtch

A good tip to bring more depth into the scene is to add some meshes for curling wallpaper and hanging ceiling plaster. Here's a good example from Metro for the ceiling. I guess for the wallpaper it's self explainatory, but if needed, in the volga level are some good examples to find. It's a few polygons more for an invaluable amount of detail that removes flatness from scenes that shouldn't be flat. Another thing is that your lines could use some more "unstraightness". As far I can tell you did some slight imperfections on the kitchen furniture and the doorframe, but the stair railing (is it called that way?) is way too straight, given that all this is soaking wet for ages. Maybe break one of the "beams" and create a hanging look to emphasize that this environment is rotting for ages now. And maybe you could amp up the imperfection in general to break the flat perfect-liney CG look. For a normal scene the imperfections are enough I'd say, but for this abandoned style it needs to be emphasized that things aren't straight anymore and everything went to shit.

But overall it looks really good!

NikDemidko

teodar23 said:

There is some inconsistency with the lighting. Im guessing its dynamic and you added some fill lights in some places but not in others.
The ivy positioning is a bit odd, where does it come from, how would it have grown in the stairwell.
The grunge is also inconsistent and at least for the cabinets it looks like mud. Unless they sat outside for a while then they were placed inside, it doesnt make sense.

Thank you for the feedback! Can you give an example, in which place fill lights are missing?

hghtch said:

A good tip to bring more depth into the scene is to add some meshes for curling wallpaper and hanging ceiling plaster. Here's a good example from Metro for the ceiling. I guess for the wallpaper it's self explainatory, but if needed, in the volga level are some good examples to find. It's a few polygons more for an invaluable amount of detail that removes flatness from scenes that shouldn't be flat. Another thing is that your lines could use some more "unstraightness". As far I can tell you did some slight imperfections on the kitchen furniture and the doorframe, but the stair railing (is it called that way?) is way too straight, given that all this is soaking wet for ages. Maybe break one of the "beams" and create a hanging look to emphasize that this environment is rotting for ages now. And maybe you could amp up the imperfection in general to break the flat perfect-liney CG look. For a normal scene the imperfections are enough I'd say, but for this abandoned style it needs to be emphasized that things aren't straight anymore and everything went to shit.

But overall it looks really good!

Great suggestions, thank you very much. Peeling wallpapers and ceiling plaster should look great if I manage to pull it off. 

Ashervisalis

I'd like to see some more modeled damage to the stairs, particularly where I've circled. Just something to break up the straight lines. As already mentioned, if you have pieces hanging from the ceiling, it could break up that straight line that is the second floor.

Where I circled in blue, I can see a repeating texture.

I also feel the grain on the cabinet has too much contrast, and the grunge needs to be touched up a bit.

Love the scene overall, I think it's great!

Totozoos

Not at pro here but an architect. Don't know if these would really matter for what you are trying to achieve but there are some 

inconsistencies in proportions and scale. In the first image for example the scale and proportions of the raillings looks off. Either proportions or height are off. Also balusters proportions are too chunky which makes accentuate the issue with the other elements. I think that the lamp and plant pot are not helping in that regard either, they make look the stair railing as if it was tiny. Something similar happens in the kitchen where the huge windows and maybe the camera position makes it seem like the counter top is lower than it should be. It looks like the ceiling is super high and the kitchen furniture is small, here it is maybe about repositioning the camera not so near the flor. Anyways, that is what I see which might not be relevant at all in terms of portfolio piece for the game industry. All the rest I think it looks great and has an awesome atmosphere. Keep it up!

Ashervisalis

Yeah, come to think of it, after reading Totozoo's comment, it looks like one might bonk their head on the ceiling while walking up those stairs. Might want to have that 2nd floor/ceiling bit start where the stairs start.

NikDemidko

Ashervisalis, thank you for taking time to circle my problematic areas. Will try to fix that. These stairs were a headache from very beginning. I was thinking about tremoving one step to increase height, but your solution sounds faster. 

Totozoos, the arhitect's opinion is extremely valuable, thank you. Railings definitely need some reviewing. I am not happy with them either, just couldn't tell what's exactly wrong. Regarding kitchen, I was checking the height of countertops before modeling it, so it should be somewhere close to the real life. Maybe windows are the problem. I'll double check the dimensions.

NikDemidko

Here is a little update. I am not absolutely happy with the result and there are still some adjustment needed. But I'd like to know your opinion. Is it getting any better?

Fixes:
1. Re-modeled stairs, fixed dimensions, added breakage.
2. Moved 
3. Lamp, photo frame and flower pot - fixed the dimensions.
4. Added cracks and falling off plaster to the ceiling.
5. Peeling wallpapers
6. Crown molding - broke the repetitive texture with vertex painting
7. Windows in kitchen - dimensions fixed, depth added
8. Bounce light alternated slightly

NikDemidko

All right. Here is my finished work:

https://www.artstation.com/artwork/Kax2Dx

Even though there is still a big room for improvement, I decided it is time to call it finished and move on to avoid getting stuck. Thanks to everybody for your comments, they really helped me to make this piece better than it could be.