Looking for critique of a 3D Japanese Onsen Environment

HomelessHobbit

Hi everyone,

This is my first post on the forum.
I was directed to post here for critique on my work whilst I was receiving a portfolio review at EGX Rezzed this weekend.
I am looking to really make every piece in my portfolio show itself in the best light and need some help to get there.
I really appreciate all comments and am hoping to work everything in together to elevate my work.

Okay so onto the work.

Here is a link to the piece on Artstation, I have attached some images here as well, but full detail will be there.
https://www.artstation.com/artwork/noyxX



I am hoping to also receive some tips on how to present my work better.

This piece was created as my Major project for my Masters degree. I also created a day/night lighting cycle for it as well as rain toggle system.

Hope to hear from you lovely people soon.

HomelessHobbit

Eric Chadwick

Hey there, welcome to Polycount.

I'm not seeing any images.

Best way to get responses is to embed your work here on Polycount. Don't make us click a link to see your stuff, that stops lots of people right away, it's a gate.

We're on a site where art is embedded all the time. It's the expectation. We've clicked on your thread, expecting to see your artwork, but now we have to click another link.

As Jon Jones says "Put the art in my face ... Imagine that your target visitor is a tired, indifferent hiring manager whose only desire is to find the shortest path possible to looking at your art."

Good luck with your project, sound cool!

Ashervisalis

Hey man, I think your night time lighting could use a lot of work (particularly in the images). The contrast between the lighting and the rest of the environment is making it so my eyes are instantly attracted to the very bright lights, and I'm not looking at the rest of the environment, which is too dark to see if I try to look at it. The rain seems too bright and white for rain drops to be at night. I also feel like the scene could use a focal point, or a hero prop. The moon is so bright and intense it keeps drawing my eyes in, but it's taking away from the rest of the scene to be honest. I'd suggest shrinking the moon down.

HomelessHobbit

Hi guys, 
Thanks for the replies, I thought I had attached pictures before, but I guess that I did it wrong.
Should be there now I hope. Thanks for the comments. Hope it is all easier to see now.

Ashervisalis said:

Hey man, I think your night time lighting could use a lot of work (particularly in the images). The contrast between the lighting and the rest of the environment is making it so my eyes are instantly attracted to the very bright lights, and I'm not looking at the rest of the environment, which is too dark to see if I try to look at it. The rain seems too bright and white for rain drops to be at night. I also feel like the scene could use a focal point, or a hero prop. The moon is so bright and intense it keeps drawing my eyes in, but it's taking away from the rest of the scene to be honest. I'd suggest shrinking the moon down.

This is all very on point, thank you. Do you have any ideas for a Hero prop that I could fit in without forcing it? I plan to add some more ambient lights to brighten the scene up somewhat as well, but any tips on how you would go about lighting a night time scene better?

Ashervisalis

For the hero prop, I think if you decided on a story for this environment first, it would help. If you put something between the two flags, that would really stand out. Maybe a statue or something? I'd also try to find a way for the camera to fit almost the entire scene into view for a shot that allows me to figure out the layout of the area.

I feel like you've adjusted the lighting since I commented yesterday? The images seem a bit brighter, which is nice. I'm assuming you have a white directional light for the moon?

HomelessHobbit

These are the same pictures, just uploaded from the originals on my PC no idea why they are so much lighter. I will have a go tomorrow at playing around with some lights and taking some more screen shots. I really like the statue idea, I did originally plan for a small fountain, but couldn't find a good spot for it, I like the idea of a statue much more. Thanks for the help so far! The moon has an emmisive as well as a light I believe.