20 months in Polycount, Improvement, Military Discharge and Insecurity
interpolator
HEllo people of Polycount!
I didn't know where to exactly post this thread, so Im just gon put it here. Hope it fits. Some of you might recognize me from constant spamming on 2D forums
I first joined Polycount in 2016 October, about 5 months after I got into my military service (now sled to civil service agent) in Korea. Twas an insane journey, I still remember finding this community for the first time and being sooo hyped by the fact that I have a community where i can interact with not only fellow students, but also the industry professionals who are literally (yes, you if you are one) heroes of mine.
(First few works I posted on Polycount back in 2016, when I thought I was good enough to share my works with you- frigging embarrassing to look back on it now)
And now I'm being officially discharged from my military duty in 2 weeks. This made me insanely melancholy, having to go back to Canada and sort out all my VISA shit, thinking that now I don't have any shield between myself being unemployed. Well, I'm returning as a sophomore so I guess that gives me about 3 years of excuse, which I hate.
(about 4~6 months later I joined Polycount)
One of the goals I set when I first joined here was to drastically improve, and although I know this is kinda ridiculous of a goal to set considering I had to teach myself everything with youtube being my only resource (and couple of books), was to reach the professional level before I return to school as a sophomore.
Obviously that didn't work out.
(About an year after I joined polycount)
I was 19 when I joined, now I'm walking out as 21, and I know that seems young to some people but I can't help but feel crazily insecure. What if I graduate and nobody wants me? What if I don't improve enough before I graduate? and MOST IMPORTANTLY WHAT IF I DON'T GET A WORKING VISA HERE HAHAHAHAHA
But yeah. As my discharge comes near, and Polycount being one of the biggest source of my inspiration, motivation, despair and insecurity, I wanted to leave a mark here as a part of journey that I will continue to walk on until I LAND A JOBBBBBB IN FEW YEARSSS (hopefully).
(My most recent works)
To be honest I'm not even sure why this post is needed, but as I said earlier I wanted this post to mark sort of a milestone of my journey at least. So when I look back on it later I could think back, or if I ever get a job in few years in the industry all the students who are suffering insecurities like I am now, can say "well if this shitty works evolved into professional then I should be able to make it too!"
I still have miles to run, nowhere near being professional, and to be honest with myself I'm not even sure if I improved at all or not. Insecurities eating me alive, but welp, gotta grind and try at least until my juice runs out so here I go.
And I'd like to thank every single one of you who came by to look at my work or who commented on my feed. Your feedback and your kind words of encouragement were huge booosts to my grind for past 2 years. THank you, thank you and thank you.
If any of yall feel like following my thread, or drop by and leave a comment, I'll buy you a beer or something if you let me know when I'm back in town in Vancouver this fall
Cheers to all of you, thank you so much for being such an awesome community, and to all le fellow beginner artists like meself lets get the grind going forever.
http://polycount.com/discussion/178177/davids-improvement-thread-cc-welcomed/p1
I didn't know where to exactly post this thread, so Im just gon put it here. Hope it fits. Some of you might recognize me from constant spamming on 2D forums
I first joined Polycount in 2016 October, about 5 months after I got into my military service (now sled to civil service agent) in Korea. Twas an insane journey, I still remember finding this community for the first time and being sooo hyped by the fact that I have a community where i can interact with not only fellow students, but also the industry professionals who are literally (yes, you if you are one) heroes of mine.
(First few works I posted on Polycount back in 2016, when I thought I was good enough to share my works with you- frigging embarrassing to look back on it now)
And now I'm being officially discharged from my military duty in 2 weeks. This made me insanely melancholy, having to go back to Canada and sort out all my VISA shit, thinking that now I don't have any shield between myself being unemployed. Well, I'm returning as a sophomore so I guess that gives me about 3 years of excuse, which I hate.
(about 4~6 months later I joined Polycount)
One of the goals I set when I first joined here was to drastically improve, and although I know this is kinda ridiculous of a goal to set considering I had to teach myself everything with youtube being my only resource (and couple of books), was to reach the professional level before I return to school as a sophomore.
Obviously that didn't work out.
(About an year after I joined polycount) I was 19 when I joined, now I'm walking out as 21, and I know that seems young to some people but I can't help but feel crazily insecure. What if I graduate and nobody wants me? What if I don't improve enough before I graduate? and MOST IMPORTANTLY WHAT IF I DON'T GET A WORKING VISA HERE HAHAHAHAHA
But yeah. As my discharge comes near, and Polycount being one of the biggest source of my inspiration, motivation, despair and insecurity, I wanted to leave a mark here as a part of journey that I will continue to walk on until I LAND A JOBBBBBB IN FEW YEARSSS (hopefully).
(My most recent works)
To be honest I'm not even sure why this post is needed, but as I said earlier I wanted this post to mark sort of a milestone of my journey at least. So when I look back on it later I could think back, or if I ever get a job in few years in the industry all the students who are suffering insecurities like I am now, can say "well if this shitty works evolved into professional then I should be able to make it too!"
I still have miles to run, nowhere near being professional, and to be honest with myself I'm not even sure if I improved at all or not. Insecurities eating me alive, but welp, gotta grind and try at least until my juice runs out so here I go.
And I'd like to thank every single one of you who came by to look at my work or who commented on my feed. Your feedback and your kind words of encouragement were huge booosts to my grind for past 2 years. THank you, thank you and thank you.
If any of yall feel like following my thread, or drop by and leave a comment, I'll buy you a beer or something if you let me know when I'm back in town in Vancouver this fall
Cheers to all of you, thank you so much for being such an awesome community, and to all le fellow beginner artists like meself lets get the grind going forever.
http://polycount.com/discussion/178177/davids-improvement-thread-cc-welcomed/p1
Replies
I can't remember where, but there was this jungle tribe in Africa or maybe South America and one of the men was climbing this unbelievably huge, tall tree to get honey from bee's nest up at the top for his peoples. His way of climbing was wrapping a big vine around the trunk, and just inch worming his way up for several hours. No safety whatsoever. I don't remember his exact words, but he says something along the lines of, "many of my friends have died doing this. If you have fear, you will fall. You cannot have fear."
Breaking into a new profession isn't so dangerous. I don't think a little insecurity here and there is going to cause your death.