[WIP] The most, most hideous Plan
null
He rushes through his enormous library, eager on picking up only the darkest, most forbidden tomes. He screams through the gargantuan building, his magnificent, powerful voice echoing through every corner. “Minions: Assemble!”
Loading his strong, buffed arms with the books, he supersonic sprints back to the grand foyer, where they await him with utmost respect and fear.
He dumps the books in their dedicated place, then taking his time to go through the rows, shaking hands and assuring everyone that he won’t annihilate them today. Probably.
He then returns to the pile of books and climbs onto them – carefully, so that his big hat does not fall down.
From up here, in this elevated position, he can see it: Terror and pure, blank horror is reflecting in their awed, button eyes. Their stitched mouths trembling before his might. Mister Fluffyfoot’s ears both pointing towards the sky to signal maximum attention.
“Today, my minions, we will see the fall of bandle city!” His mighty, inspiring, glorious, and certainly also attractive voice striking fear in his audience’s heart. “My superior plan will bring doom to them and change their world forever.”
One of Mister Fufflyfoot’s ears flaps down.
He points his staff of extreme powerfulness at his servant. “That is a great question, Fluffyfoot! Why don’t you come up here and articulate it then?”
He climbs down the pile of books again scuttles over to the puppet, puts it on his right hand, goes back to the books, and climbs up again.
It is rather difficult with Flufflyfoot around his hand, but he is unstoppable after all.
As they stand atop of his altar of wrongdoings, Fluffyfoot’s voice is broken and distorted in anguish. “Oh great master of all vile, evil, ingenious, genius, and rigid, what is thy wicked plan to obliterate the stupid city and its silly people to fulfil your impossible task?”
“Ah yes, Mister Fluffyfoot, indeed a fine question. I have fulfilled an act so brilliant even the devils will fear me afterwards! When their dumb 4:34 tea break begins and they all will bitterly notice, that I swapped out their sugar with salt. Salt! That is not sugar!”
A collective gasp runs through the crowd. A few strains of wool run out of their buttoned eyes when they realize his true evilness. He hears them whisper and shiver.
“Yes, my minions, yes! They will never recover. Mwu-ha… Mwu-ha… Mwu-ha-ha-he-heh-hi-hi-hiii…”
Roaring applause emerges from their super soft paws, hands and wings.
He jumps off the tower of bools and strides away, for a dramatic exit.
Also it is almost time for his ravenous 4:33 coffee break. True insidious wizards drink coffee.
He enters the atrium build from black marble and the bones of his enemies; Mostly marble though.
“Fluffyfoot, fill my cup!" The bunny-fairy obeys with utmost efficiency, as they reach the magnificent table. The black essence of power gushes into the cup, steaming with all the plans he will draw of it.
“Fluffyfoot, fill my cup!" The bunny-fairy obeys with utmost efficiency, as they reach the magnificent table. The black essence of power gushes into the cup, steaming with all the plans he will draw of it.
“Now Mister Fluffyfoot, the sugar!” The puppet servant reaches for the sugar, but his master holds him back, quite literally.
“Are you trying to poison me, you imbecile?!” “But no, your unholyness! How would I dare to?” “Then reach not for the sugar. Reach for the salt. I just told you I swapped them in all of the city.” “Oh you are so smart. I would have forgotten.” Yes, know.” “You are so perfect! “Yes.” “And so brilliant!” “Sure.” “And so handsome!” “It’s getting creepy now. I just wanted sugar.” “Ah yes, milord!”
His minion reaches for the saltshaker and dumps a bit of it in the brew. “More.” And slightly more. “A bit more.”
It is a really strong black essence of power.
He steers around elegantly and takes a sip.
He stiffens.
“Oh what is it, ungodly lord of destruction and total annihilation?”
“Maybe, I had just planned about swapping sugar for salt. Maybe, I have just thought about planning it. Maybe, I was just thinking about thinking about a plan.”
Silence.
Considerably majestic silence.
The button eyes of the striped bunny-fairy stares at him insecurely. His stitched lips pressed together.
The wizard jumps up, kicking back his heavy, massive chair. “It… It was… It was but a test! A test, yes! To see if it would work! And it works!” “Oooh.”
“Yes, Mister Fluffyfoot, once my plan is ripened and fully executed, the defeat of bundle city will be written as utmost bitter!”
And salty.
Mostly salty.