Hello everyone, I'm trying to get out of my comfort zone with some slightly longer more complex animations. I'd love feedback on this first one please. First time I've used stretchy limbs so I may have overdone it.
https://syncsketch.com/sketch/178969#228251Thanks
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For example, at f83, you really don't need the hand to be still stuck to the wall. Have it do it's natural thing and use the stretch to create an arc so there isn't a big pop between the poses.
As far as the anim goes, I would speed up f26-f36.
At f23, it feels like he slows down too much into the apex of the jump.
Maybe make the apex higher for the jump at f59. It feels like he should travel a little higher.
landing on wall at f62 feels a little too snappy, I think.
Starting pose is dull and uninteresting.
Consider having a reverse c shape on f63. Then snap to a c shape on f66. Loosen up the spine, feels stiff.
f83 - pose could be more dynamic. Can really lean the spine over so it's still favouring the wall.
From f64 to the end, I think the poses could be stronger and more dynamic. Especially given the style of the shot.
Overall, it's nice work, keep it up.
The start could start mid stride of a run into the jump, as if this is a shot in a longer sequence and starts with the cut on action. No need to do a full run, just the 15~29 frames from the run transition into the jump. The 2nd swing around the pole could be full 360. Then the arc from the pole to the tall wall could use a slight hang through the apex. He sticks for about 5 frames on contact with the tall wall, I think it feels better if he starts sliding down immediately, starting slow and picking up speed. The final landing could be a tumble/roll, then continue into another action to end on, again as if a cut on action to the next shot.
As far as the limbs stretching it's hard for viewer to tell what your intention is at the moment, if you want to use them as smears the transitions should be a little quicker. Too many frames stretched makes the character look stretchy instead of blurred from fast motion. Alternatively you could play up the stretchy limbs like Dahlsim, that could suggesting new interesting ways you do this traversal sequence.
https://syncsketch.com/sketch/178969#230345
you could introduce more incompetence earlier on, for example the 360 swing around the pole could be unintentional, he swings and intends to proceed to the wall, but fear prevents him from letting go of the pole and he ends up spinning extra circle around the pole and the added momentum forced him lose grip. this maintains consistency in the character.
you could change the ending and keep him consistent with most of the action, end through a tumble straight into a run, parkour style. He's a pro, nothing to it. again, consistent with the character's abilities established from the beginning.
you could make the ending a twist, would need to amp up the twist than a simple fumble to a sitting position, similar to wiley cayote and the road runner. some terrain or object becomes unexpected obstacle at the end that makes the character crash and burn hard. So there maybe a pole or tree or rock, it's always been there but not something one expects to pose problems for the character, until the very end. here the viewer and character are both equally surprised at the end.
one other way you could go is the swing around the pole triggered some mechanism that results in a change in the environment that causes the character to fail at the end. here you play on viewer's anticipation on an event that the character is totally unaware of. and can be effective.
This is what I have now, I ended it in a more parkour style way, he rolls and then jumps off the edge, any feedback much appreciated and thank you to whomever did a few draw overs on my first post and the speed correction on the second synchsketch.
https://syncsketch.com/sketch/178969#232342
I've made a lot of changes since the previous post, I was also lucky enough to get a live critique by Elyse Gymer ( #ElyseCritiques ) I think it looks better but I want to keep pushing this, critique is welcome.
I still need to track my arcs, I'm seeing a lot of weird stuff right now, the ending especially.
https://syncsketch.com/sketch/178969#236525
5 - Silhouette could be stronger. Especially for the arms. Offset them so we see both.
f21 - The overlap of the legs as he swings back is too much in my opinion.
f77 - Maybe look at some ref but I feel like the legs would tucked in a little. Because I feel like coming from f75, there needs to be some continuation of the momentum of the legs. It just mind of stays in position for a few frames in relation tot he rest of the body.
f101 - This pose could be more interesting. It#s very symmetrical and straight up and down at the moment.
f114 - You have a pause here before he jumps off the ledge. In my opinion, this breaks his character a little bit. We just saw him doing all the parkour stuff before. I would imagine it's be a smoother transition into the jumo off. Very seamless and efficient. You could do this and then get some some more hang-time. A little pause at the apex and then disappears off screen quickly.
Looking good.