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Paul's Animation Thread - Critique Needed

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ihaveaspoon vertex
Hi everyone, I'm Paul I'm a junior animator at Tt Games in Manchester, UK.
I've only signed up today and already seen how great useful the animation forum is. So I joined up hoping to get some feedback and critique on my own personal work I'm doing in my spare time.

The animation I'm currently working on is a new voice acting piece.
I've just finished up on the blocking plus and I wanted to see what crit I could get before I went into splining it. 
The face has just some basic eye and eyebrow shapes atm, I've not worked in the mouth yet.

My current animation:
https://syncsketch.com/sketch/166918#207117


Thanks and hope to get some great feedback. 


A bit more about me can be found on my website:
https://www.pauljhealey.co.uk/

My current showreel:


Replies

  • AnthonyAnimation
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    AnthonyAnimation greentooth
    Are you looking for feedback on your reel or just your current acting shot? Cool start, I left a few notes.
  • ihaveaspoon
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    ihaveaspoon vertex
    Hi Anthony,

    Initially I was hoping for just feedback on my current acting shot. As my showreel is 80/90% published work that can't be altered but if you have feedback on the edit. Does the order work, what shot isn't working and all that. I just trying to freshen up my showreel with new personal work. As what's in there is a bit old now and it very Lego heavy now after being at Tt games for two years.

    Also thanks for the feedback left on syncsketch :smile: very much appreciated! 

    Thanks
  • AnthonyAnimation
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    AnthonyAnimation greentooth
    Sure! Generally I'd recommend keeping a reel you're sending to recruiters under 1 minute. If it's just a collection of work, then over that is fine, but it's hard to keep someones attention for too long. Since you are updating it I may be reiterating things you already know, but a few things that stand out-

    The Batman shots looks like they're moving at a slower frame rate and are a little choppy.

    Overall I'd pick two or three of your favorite Lego shots if you want them in there. Although they are fun, I think there are other rigs which would better show off your animation skills.

    The "It's a trap!" shot is a bit quick, especially out of context it can be hard to follow what is happening.

    The eagle shot is pretty good- http://www.brendanbody.co.uk/flight_tutorial/index.html very detailed breakdown of bird flight mechanics.

    Ogre with an axe is also on the right track. Some poses and timing could be exaggerated.

    "The Boss" monologue- Pretty good start. Lip sync could use some love in some places and there's some twinning in the hands throughout the shot.

    Looking forward to an update!
  • ihaveaspoon
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    ihaveaspoon vertex
    Hi Anthony, Sorry for the late reply work has been murder. I've only just been able to get back to this animation today since I posted the original post.

    Yeah I know about the 1 minute rule, but sometimes it's hard to know what to cut out. The time I have now (1:45mins) it's awful but I could improve it. Probably after I get a new haul of animation together, I can sit down and map it all out again. I would say all the personal animation will be filtered out soon as they are two years old or more now. 

    I agree with the Batman shots and it's because I had to get copies off youtube. That's first one I didn't get in-game capture from work. I'm gonna try and get a proper capture soon when I can download all the data again to run the game. 

    Like I said I know it's Lego heavy but mainly because I haven't done any personal work since I got the job at Tt Games. I hope to get about 5 new personal animations done over the next few months so I can start removing old pieces and editing down the Lego stuff. 

    "It's a trap!" is just fun and Iconic, I could put the front end and the back end of the scene but I didn't think it would need it. 

    For the eagle shot I use exactly that and more. I got a lot feed back from guys at 'Bring your own animation' monthly group in London, UK.

    The Orge one was annoying as the rig was rubbish, the geo would twist in on it's self so easily. So I got to a point where it was the best I could get it and move on.

    The Boss shot, my lip syncing has gotten a lot better since I did this but I don't think I'm gonna go back to change it. The twinning of the hands was purposeful. Twinning it's a bad thing, we naturally do it all the time.
    - good blog post it http://www.timrudder.com/animationmentor/twinning-ratatouille/ 
    & http://www.animatorisland.com/defining-the-art-twinning/

    Animation Update:

    https://syncsketch.com/sketch/166918#212634

    I put a background in, I changed the spacing and strength of the to the two nods on "weekend" and "upon us" . I changed the hand gesture and it flows better now. With staging, I purposefully left him more on the right side. 
    I think it's solid now and hopefully moving on to splining it. I hope to get this done before the end of the coming week. 


    Thanks! :smiley:
  • ihaveaspoon
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    ihaveaspoon vertex

    Hi Anthony, thanks for the feedback.

    I know about the golden 1 minute rule, but it’s not a total sin to go over. My reel time has been a lot longer and it was hard to trim it down to what I have atm. Once I have some new overhaul of animation I will be able to edit and trim it down, especially all the Lego shots.

     

    Sadly the Batman shot are jittery because I did get proper catures from work and had to resort to getting them off youtube. I hope to reinstall the game at work and get some proper capture to fix those edits.

    I will trim down the amount of Lego shots I have when I get a load of new personal shots completed. Then it will be more balanced.

    With “it’s a trap” shot I just really like it and it’s an iconic shot. I could add the front and back parts of the shot to help it but that would be adding more time. I say it will be one of the few shots that will be removed.

    The eagle shot was done using all the reference on that site. I even got a lot of feed back at ‘Bring you own animation’ group in London, UK.

    With the Orge animation, the rig is rubbish. The geo easily twists into it’s self and the rotations are set up weird. So I got it as close as a could to be dine and moved on.

    The Boss animation, I’m still really happy with. I have gotten better with the lip sync since I completed this nearly 3years ago. Also I purposefully chose for him to be twinning, we naturally do it all the time. It’s not the worst thing to do, here’s some blogs about it.

    http://www.timrudder.com/animationmentor/twinning-ratatouille/

    http://www.animatorisland.com/defining-the-art-twinning/ 

    http://www.olivier-ladeuix.com/blog/2010/11/02/to-twin-or-not-to-twin/ 



    Animation Update:


    https://syncsketch.com/sketch/166918#212634 

    I put a background in, I’ve changed the spacing and intensity of the two nods on 'weekend' and 'upon us'. I also staged him up to walking into shot and standing on the right from centre. I changed the hand gesture and it feels a lot better.

    I think I’m gonna move on to splining it now. I hope to get this done by the end of the week if I can get enough free time to do it.

     

    Thanks.

  • ihaveaspoon
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    ihaveaspoon vertex

    Hi Anthony, thanks for the feedback.

    I know about the golden 1 minute rule, but it’s not a total sin to go over. My reel time has been a lot longer and it was hard to trim it down to what I have atm. Once I have some new overhaul of animation I will be able to edit and trim it down, especially all the Lego shots.

     

    Sadly the Batman shot are jittery because I did get proper catures from work and had to resort to getting them off youtube. I hope to reinstall the game at work and get some proper capture to fix those edits.

    I will trim down the amount of Lego shots I have when I get a load of new personal shots completed. Then it will be more balanced.

    With “it’s a trap” shot I just really like it and it’s an iconic shot. I could add the front and back parts of the shot to help it but that would be adding more time. I say it will be one of the few shots that will be removed.

    The eagle shot was done using all the reference on that site. I even got a lot of feed back at ‘Bring you own animation’ group in London, UK.

    With the Orge animation, the rig is rubbish. The geo easily twists into it’s self and the rotations are set up weird. So I got it as close as a could to be dine and moved on.

    The Boss animation, I’m still really happy with. I have gotten better with the lip sync since I completed this nearly 3years ago. Also I purposefully chose for him to be twinning, we naturally do it all the time. It’s not the worst thing to do, here’s some blogs about it.

    http://www.timrudder.com/animationmentor/twinning-ratatouille/

    http://www.animatorisland.com/defining-the-art-twinning/ 

    http://www.olivier-ladeuix.com/blog/2010/11/02/to-twin-or-not-to-twin/ 



    Animation Update:


    https://syncsketch.com/sketch/166918#212634 

    I put a background in, I’ve changed the spacing and intensity of the two nods on 'weekend' and 'upon us'. I also staged him up to walking into shot and standing on the right from centre. I changed the hand gesture and it feels a lot better.

    I think I’m gonna move on to splining it now. I hope to get this done by the end of the week if I can get enough free time to do it.

     

    Thanks.

  • ihaveaspoon
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    ihaveaspoon vertex

    Hi Anthony, thanks for the feedback.

    I know about the golden 1 minute rule, but it’s not a total sin to go over. My reel time has been a lot longer and it was hard to trim it down to what I have atm. Once I have some new overhaul of animation I will be able to edit and trim it down, especially all the Lego shots.

     

    Sadly the Batman shot are jittery because I did get proper captures from work and had to resort to getting them off youtube. I hope to reinstall the game at work and get some proper capture to fix those edits.

    I will trim down the amount of Lego shots I have when I get a load of new personal shots completed. Then it will be more balanced.

    With “it’s a trap” shot I just really like it and it’s an iconic shot. I could add the front and back parts of the shot to help it but that would be adding more time. I say it will be one of the few shots that will be removed.

    The eagle shot was done using all the reference on that site. I even got a lot of feed back at ‘Bring you own animation’ group in London, UK.

    With the Orge animation, the rig is rubbish. The geo easily twists into it’s self and the rotations are set up weird. So I got it as close as a could to be dine and moved on.

    The Boss animation, I’m still really happy with. I have gotten better with the lip sync since I completed this nearly 3years ago. Also I purposefully chose for him to be twinning, we naturally do it all the time. It’s not the worst thing to do, here’s some blogs about it.

    http://www.timrudder.com/animationmentor/twinning-ratatouille/

    http://www.animatorisland.com/defining-the-art-twinning/ 

    http://www.olivier-ladeuix.com/blog/2010/11/02/to-twin-or-not-to-twin/ 



    Animation Update:


    https://syncsketch.com/sketch/166918#212634 

    I put a background in, I’ve changed the spacing and intensity of the two nods on 'weekend' and 'upon us'. I also staged him up to walking into shot and standing on the right from centre. I changed the hand gesture and it feels a lot better.

    I think I’m gonna move on to splining it now. I hope to get this done by the end of the week if I can get enough free time to do it.

     

    Thanks.

  • ihaveaspoon
    Offline / Send Message
    ihaveaspoon vertex

    Hi Anthony, thanks for the feedback.

    I know about the golden 1 minute rule, but it’s not a total sin to go over. My reel time has been a lot longer and it was hard to trim it down to what I have atm. Once I have some new overhaul of animation I will be able to edit and trim it down, especially all the Lego shots.

     

    Sadly the Batman shot are jittery because I did get proper catures from work and had to resort to getting them off youtube. I hope to reinstall the game at work and get some proper capture to fix those edits.

    I will trim down the amount of Lego shots I have when I get a load of new personal shots completed. Then it will be more balanced.

    With “it’s a trap” shot I just really like it and it’s an iconic shot. I could add the front and back parts of the shot to help it but that would be adding more time. I say it will be one of the few shots that will be removed.

    The eagle shot was done using all the reference on that site. I even got a lot of feed back at ‘Bring you own animation’ group in London, UK.

    With the Orge animation, the rig is rubbish. The geo easily twists into it’s self and the rotations are set up weird. So I got it as close as a could to be dine and moved on.

    The Boss animation, I’m still really happy with. I have gotten better with the lip sync since I completed this nearly 3years ago. Also I purposefully chose for him to be twinning, we naturally do it all the time. It’s not the worst thing to do, here’s some blogs about it.

    http://www.timrudder.com/animationmentor/twinning-ratatouille/

    http://www.animatorisland.com/defining-the-art-twinning/ 

    http://www.olivier-ladeuix.com/blog/2010/11/02/to-twin-or-not-to-twin/ 



    Animation Update:


    https://syncsketch.com/sketch/166918#212634 

    I put a background in, I’ve changed the spacing and intensity of the two nods on 'weekend' and 'upon us'. I also staged him up to walking into shot and standing on the right from centre. I changed the hand gesture and it feels a lot better.

    I think I’m gonna move on to splining it now. I hope to get this done by the end of the week if I can get enough free time to do it.

     

    Thanks.

  • ihaveaspoon
    Offline / Send Message
    ihaveaspoon vertex

    Hi Anthony, thanks for the feedback.

    I know about the golden 1 minute rule, but it’s not a total sin to go over. My reel time has been a lot longer and it was hard to trim it down to what I have atm. Once I have some new overhaul of animation I will be able to edit and trim it down, especially all the Lego shots.

     

    Sadly the Batman shot are jittery because I did get proper catures from work and had to resort to getting them off youtube. I hope to reinstall the game at work and get some proper capture to fix those edits.

    I will trim down the amount of Lego shots I have when I get a load of new personal shots completed. Then it will be more balanced.

    With “it’s a trap” shot I just really like it and it’s an iconic shot. I could add the front and back parts of the shot to help it but that would be adding more time. I say it will be one of the few shots that will be removed.

    The eagle shot was done using all the reference on that site. I even got a lot of feed back at ‘Bring you own animation’ group in London, UK.

    With the Orge animation, the rig is rubbish. The geo easily twists into it’s self and the rotations are set up weird. So I got it as close as a could to be dine and moved on.

    The Boss animation, I’m still really happy with. I have gotten better with the lip sync since I completed this nearly 3years ago. Also I purposefully chose for him to be twinning, we naturally do it all the time. It’s not the worst thing to do, here’s some blogs about it.

    http://www.timrudder.com/animationmentor/twinning-ratatouille/

    http://www.olivier-ladeuix.com/blog/2010/11/02/to-twin-or-not-to-twin/ 



    Animation Update:


    https://syncsketch.com/sketch/166918#212634 

    I put a background in, I’ve changed the spacing and intensity of the two nods on 'weekend' and 'upon us'. I also staged him up to walking into shot and standing on the right from centre. I changed the hand gesture and it feels a lot better.

    I think I’m gonna move on to splining it now. I hope to get this done by the end of the week if I can get enough free time to do it.

     

    Thanks.

  • ihaveaspoon
    Offline / Send Message
    ihaveaspoon vertex

    Hi Anthony, thanks for the feedback.

    I know about the golden 1 minute rule, but it’s not a total sin to go over. My reel time has been a lot longer and it was hard to trim it down to what I have atm. Once I have some new overhaul of animation I will be able to edit and trim it down, especially all the Lego shots.

     

    Sadly the Batman shot are jittery because I did get proper catures from work and had to resort to getting them off youtube. I hope to reinstall the game at work and get some proper capture to fix those edits.

    I will trim down the amount of Lego shots I have when I get a load of new personal shots completed. Then it will be more balanced.

    With “it’s a trap” shot I just really like it and it’s an iconic shot. I could add the front and back parts of the shot to help it but that would be adding more time. I say it will be one of the few shots that will be removed.

    The eagle shot was done using all the reference on that site. I even got a lot of feed back at ‘Bring you own animation’ group in London, UK.

    With the Orge animation, the rig is rubbish. The geo easily twists into it’s self and the rotations are set up weird. So I got it as close as a could to be dine and moved on.

    The Boss animation, I’m still really happy with. I have gotten better with the lip sync since I completed this nearly 3years ago. Also I purposefully chose for him to be twinning, we naturally do it all the time. It’s not the worst thing to do, here’s some blogs about it.


    Animation Update:


    https://syncsketch.com/sketch/166918#212634 

    I put a background in, I’ve changed the spacing and intensity of the two nods on 'weekend' and 'upon us'. I also staged him up to walking into shot and standing on the right from centre. I changed the hand gesture and it feels a lot better.

    I think I’m gonna move on to splining it now. I hope to get this done by the end of the week if I can get enough free time to do it.

     

    Thanks.

  • LiamReynolds
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    LiamReynolds polycounter lvl 3
    On the new shot. I feel its just stiff overall. It could be to do with that its a very tight mid-shot and his arms go on and off screen. It would be nice to see a full body as you get to see a persons body language.

    It just overall feels abit dull, that could be to do with what hes doing, i.e hes kinda just stood there talking to camera, whats the context etc. maybe hes interacting with a prop more than just at the end as i dont find it a gag or anything just someting that happens. because his arms/hands are behind his back, would he not do alot more body/head nods rather than his hands. it would atleast add more character than doing the classic acting beats with hand gestures - as atm its on every part, as in the hand sweep and '2'.

    I dont do many acting shots but it just seems to lack appeal to me anyway - maybe with the facial it will help.
  • ihaveaspoon
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    ihaveaspoon vertex
    Sorry for the late reply, I had surgery on my hand 3weeks ago and not been on here since. I'm about 80% recovered now. 

    The character is like a military sort of guy and they tend to be kinda stiff, no bull short of guy. I see what you mean, it is a bit tight. I could do with pull the camera out a bit more. Not sure about a full body shot. There will be a lot of negative space then.
    The context is he welcoming a group of boy scouts for 'Wilderness Weekend' Camp. The prop is a bit of a reveal as he stating don't mess around, 'me and mother nature' aren't to be taken lightly.
    I thought a was already pushing it with head movements, but his body is meant to be stiff to show 'whos boss' and in charge. 

    I was nearly finished with the spline before I had my surgery and it's coming along very nicely. Once I can animate comfortably with my hand, I will finish it up. 

    Thanks

  • LiamReynolds
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    LiamReynolds polycounter lvl 3
    I think theres room to make something organic but stiff in style. Whereas mechanically, yours is stiff due to posing. I think the animation can be alot more free flowing but still acheive that stiffness of character you are refering too. Its kind of hard to do that if you are already in spline by now.

    I only mentioned to pull the camera out so you can see the full performance of a character.
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