looks good, I would remove the black bar on her boobs though, this is an adult and professional forum (mostly :P), people usually frown on things like censuring and water marks to mention two. if your worried about it, you cab ad "nudity" as a disclaimer on the thread title.
Cool style! I like it. Maybe you could try experimenting with adding some stronger lineart to increase readability, though they work very well as they are.
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