Home Animation Showcase & Critiques

First animated scene - Feedback needed

Hey,

This is my first post here, I've been working on an animated scene for university, and this is my first attempt at animating a full scene. I usually work on game animations.

The character is becoming increasingly frustrated at the fridge over time before eventually caving in...

I feel as if I have the majority of the spacing correct, it's just the poses that need working on the most. But please throw any comments on here! I need to improve!
Although I must say I feel as if I should have done a shorter animation which I could have focused on polishing more, especially as it's entirely hand animated, as I have only been working on this for A month and a half.

Thank you.


[ame="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cVkR3Pj-nV8"]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cVkR3Pj-nV8[/ame]

Also, ignore the very blocky scene, I wanted to focus on animation!

Replies

  • Connecta
    Offline / Send Message
    Connecta polycounter lvl 12
    Hi! I dont feel that I'm good enough to give you any good feedback, but my overall thought was that the character felt stiff/mechanical.
    Ex: when the hands hit the table at the start, the lower arm rotates up mechanically and after that it goes forward and hits perfectly. Try to make it arc more, make it swing up above the table and then hit down (it's angry, so that would portray that more as well).
    Another thing that makes it feel mechanical for me is maybe that the parts does stuff without correlation with other parts (lacking overlapping action) for example the spine in the first part, it begins rotating at the same time as the hands and stops before the hands hit - and stays still for a while, then begins moving down after the hands hit, and does so quite linearly, without easing in/out.

    This scene is a bit too long to easily give feedback on, would recommend either cutting it up in smaller pieces and ask for feedback on or uploading it on syncsketch so one could paint on it. Otherwise I would recommend you to maybe not go for so long scenes (Movie-standard on animation is 4sec per week)

    Anywho, just my two cents. Keep up the good work:)
  • slipsius
    This is quite a long video. A little too long, I think, for your first one. A common mistake is people tend to bite off more than they can chew, and I feel that is the case here, which you touched on a bit in your description. So it's good that you recognize that. But ya, you went for quantity, rather than quality. My guess is that is has something to do with your school assignment. Schools tend to ask for more, rather than better.

    Your biggest flaws right now are follow-through and overlap. You don't have any. This results in a very stiff character, that looks extremely pose to pose. Everything on the guys body is moving at the same time. For instance, around the 0:46 mark, the guy falls back into the desk, but his hands hit the desk at the same time his body hits the peak of going backward. What should happen instead is his hands hit the table to brace the impact while his upper body continues to move back. His body would eventually hit that backwards peak, and his head would keep going for a couple more frames. Everything overlapping. Everything following through. I try to work all of this into my initial pose out. Don't be afraid to have a lot of keys. Keying a character doesn't have to be one of those "less is more" type of things.

    Your cameras are actually better than expected for a newbie. I didn't notice it crossing the line at all (see 180 rule). Most people new to camera work break that rule a lot, so kudos to that, whether it be intentional or not, it's a good thing. I do think you have too much movement on your cameras though. Camera movement should add to your shot, not take away from it. If you notice the camera moving in a shot like this, that's a bad thing. I think in a shot like this, you`d be better off with static cameras. Unlike keying your character, when it comes to cameras, less is more. No need to Micheal Bay your animation.

    So where to next? Well, you can take all the crits you have and apply it to your current animation. Fix it up. Might be an option, since this is for class. Or, take the crits, take what you learned, what to do, what not to do, and start a new animation. Go for something shorter that you can focus on quality. When I was still in school, and still new to animation, I found that it was better to start something new, rather than try and polish the piece i was working on. Im sure you saw it coming out a lot better than it did. It's a common thing with artists and animators. They picture something in their head, but they don't yet have the skills to make it look that good. And the truth is, at this point in your career, it will never look that good. It's not something to be ashamed of, or feel bad about. It's just had it goes. But, if you start over, I garentee your animation will be at least twice as good as this piece, and you`ll probably do it twice as fast. You`ll be amazed by how much you actually learned on this one, even if it feels like you didnt.

    I hope this doesn't scare you off. I can see potential. You just need to keep at it. Keep practicing. Don't be afraid to fail and start over. You`ll learn more than if you succeed the first time.

    Best of luck!

    edit: Btw. You are correct in that the poses need the most work. Your timing is pretty decent. Not perfect, but probably one of the stronger parts of this piece. It feels a bit even at times, but that is something you`ll learn with time. How to push the timing more and really make it interesting. But for now, you`re absolutely on the right track with it.
  • BohSheh
    Offline / Send Message
    BohSheh polycounter lvl 11
    I think you should add some recoil on fast motion .
  • simpo
    Offline / Send Message
    simpo null
    I think it is pretty good stuff....
  • tristan1590
    Offline / Send Message
    tristan1590 polycounter lvl 3
    Not to bad for a start. I realize I am late to the party but I think something you could use is more close up's. everything is a mid shot so it starts to get kind of boring. For instance, from the point he walks into the room to the point where he opens the fridge is all on continuous shot. You could shorten this greatly by having him come up, show his exhaustion, have a close up of him perhaps looking to the fridge, maybe he starts toward it, then you cut to him opening the fridge. You could use different methods to build tension if you wanted to at this point. Maybe have more close ups of his hands, and face in general. I won;t comment too much on the animation since it's kind of still blocked out, but it does feel a little even, when he places his hands on things they are too static, etc. You could definitely find ways to make this actually be a really nice piece if you have the time. My advice is to make more cuts, more close ups so you don't have too much dead time. Hope this is helpful! Keep at it, it's coming along.
  • linwail
    Offline / Send Message
    linwail polycounter lvl 5
    Incredibly stiff character. I didn't get the feeling that the character could be doing these actions. It doesn't seem believable to me. The first thing I would work on is timing. Speed up some parts and potentially slow other parts. It is pretty good for a first attempt at a large animation, but it needs a lot more work. Go back to your key poses and make them a bit more realistic. Add overlap on the spine and more on the arms. You have great potential but need more work on the basics.
  • Lucas Dash
    Really good, but don't forget of the anticipation of the movements
Sign In or Register to comment.