The sky outside has some serious HDR going on, it should reflect that in your piece, notably the first picture you posted. It might also be nice to have the light come in from an angle, towards the head of the bed for example, so we can see it a bit easier.
Secondly, the floor needs alot of work, eg rubbish, dirt, etc. The walls too need some extra dirt, you could make some use of vertex painting to get the job done there. Overall the scene just needs that "last bit" to really make it stand out like the concept. The broken glass, really decaying posters on the wall, clothes hanging out the dresser, etc. You get the idea.
What you have now isn't bad though by any means, but like I said, it just needs that "extra bit" of grime and detail to really make it good and stand out. I like the direction your taking, so it should be interesting to see what else comes of this .
I totally see what you mean, I'll get on the grime and such. I've been thinking about the lighting and because there's only one light source I don't know if it would be okay to just fake another light source or just have so that more of the light spills into the room from the window.
To add more light, you could always try increasing the brightness of the light you have now/or the ambient light. You could also open the door and make the hallway like in the concept and add a lightsource from there.
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Secondly, the floor needs alot of work, eg rubbish, dirt, etc. The walls too need some extra dirt, you could make some use of vertex painting to get the job done there. Overall the scene just needs that "last bit" to really make it stand out like the concept. The broken glass, really decaying posters on the wall, clothes hanging out the dresser, etc. You get the idea.
What you have now isn't bad though by any means, but like I said, it just needs that "extra bit" of grime and detail to really make it good and stand out. I like the direction your taking, so it should be interesting to see what else comes of this .