Quit current job for brushing up Skills/Portfolio for 4-5 months, Opinions? Thoughts?
polycounter lvl 11
Okay bear with me 
.
Here's the short rundown, I worked in a game studio for about 2 years, working as a junior 3d Artist/Leveldesigner. unfortunately the studio went belly-flop along with the economy and due to my short work experience it was hard for me to get a job, add to that some personal issues which resulted in a year sitting on the couch watching my savings evaporate and basically not doing anything. (motivation was at an all time low.)
At some point I managed to get a non artist-job, pay is low, and working conditions are even lower, but the money was needed.
The trouble is, I've been stuck in this job for almost 3 years now and it's not leading me anywhere. what started as a temporary necessity slowly mutated into a rut I only recently woke up from.
I looked back to what I wanted at my life and started to pick up my artwork again, shocked at how my skill has waned after four years, I'm slowly relearning all the basics and new stuff that has been popping up in the 3D world to regain my foothold to move on.
The only problem is time, primarily in combination with my current job. The work is pretty soul crushing and when I come home it's usually pretty late, and it's very tiring. I have a few hours in the evening, but it's often not enough to get things rolling the way I want to.
But an opportunity has come up, my girlfriend currently has stable working conditions and income, and offered a plan that would (if it all works out) allow me to stop working for 4, to 5 months tops to completely focus on brushing up my skills to a proper industry standard to give me a better chance to get back into the game.
I have tons of study material available, dvd's and whatnot that I'm already working through, they are a great help, but lack of steady progress is really frustrating.
So if you're still reading
, has anyone tried something like this before? what were your experiences? was it worth it? my skills in 3D are sub-average at best atm, but the basic knowledge is there. I know I can pick it up again and improve at a steady pace when enough time is given. is it enough time to make a difference?
Still considering it, I don't want to put any strain my girlfriend and our home situation but the option is available...I'm a pretty cautious guy and kind of want to prevent any backfires...
your thoughts?
.Here's the short rundown, I worked in a game studio for about 2 years, working as a junior 3d Artist/Leveldesigner. unfortunately the studio went belly-flop along with the economy and due to my short work experience it was hard for me to get a job, add to that some personal issues which resulted in a year sitting on the couch watching my savings evaporate and basically not doing anything. (motivation was at an all time low.)
At some point I managed to get a non artist-job, pay is low, and working conditions are even lower, but the money was needed.
The trouble is, I've been stuck in this job for almost 3 years now and it's not leading me anywhere. what started as a temporary necessity slowly mutated into a rut I only recently woke up from.
I looked back to what I wanted at my life and started to pick up my artwork again, shocked at how my skill has waned after four years, I'm slowly relearning all the basics and new stuff that has been popping up in the 3D world to regain my foothold to move on.
The only problem is time, primarily in combination with my current job. The work is pretty soul crushing and when I come home it's usually pretty late, and it's very tiring. I have a few hours in the evening, but it's often not enough to get things rolling the way I want to.
But an opportunity has come up, my girlfriend currently has stable working conditions and income, and offered a plan that would (if it all works out) allow me to stop working for 4, to 5 months tops to completely focus on brushing up my skills to a proper industry standard to give me a better chance to get back into the game.
I have tons of study material available, dvd's and whatnot that I'm already working through, they are a great help, but lack of steady progress is really frustrating.
So if you're still reading
, has anyone tried something like this before? what were your experiences? was it worth it? my skills in 3D are sub-average at best atm, but the basic knowledge is there. I know I can pick it up again and improve at a steady pace when enough time is given. is it enough time to make a difference?Still considering it, I don't want to put any strain my girlfriend and our home situation but the option is available...I'm a pretty cautious guy and kind of want to prevent any backfires...
your thoughts?
Replies
Yeah, inadvertently. I was working a graphic design job and got laid off. I had had some horrible experiences working graphic design (terrible clients, long hours, awful projects and bad management). I had had an interest to then in 3d, although I hadn't really gotten into it the way I wanted. My gf and I moved to a smaller town so she could take a different position, and there were no graphics openings here, so I was basically out of luck.
It lasted about a year. It was awful.
To my credit, I learned a ton, and I got a ton of experience under my belt basically working full days. But not working is depressing, and being the person not working in a relationship can lead to resentment, even if what you are doing has been planned. This isn't the case in all relationships, but I would say that it is a real danger for most couples in this situation.
Beyond that, not having a job is tough. It's just hard to not work. It can feel like you're betting it all on a 'dream', because there are a lot of people who don't make it in the field. It leads to a lot of self doubt, perhaps more self doubt than is healthy. In my case, it made learning hard.
After a year, I got a job. A crappy low paying job. It felt awesome. Long, long hours to. But feeling good really helped my learning. Job let us move on in life over just 'treading water'. Got married, had a kid.
Which brings me to here. Having responsibilities was the best thing that happened to my skill level. I would come home from an 11 hour shift, spend some time with my pregnant wife, then knock out 6 hours on the computer. I was sleeping like 4 hours a night. On days I didn't work, I would get 10-12 hours in - and because there were stressers on my time, it was focused work.
Point being, I really think that if you're not getting it done now, you can imagine that things might not change if you quit your job. Could be that your job really is so soul sucking that artistic thought isn't possible, but learning (I have found) is rarely inspired, it's more of a long-term effort.
If you need to make a life change in order to get done what you want to accomplish, it doesn't necessarily mean dropping everything and focusing on one task. Consider finding a new job, something that, at worst, just doesn't drain you mentally.
But there is a super big chance I might not know anything about anything, I expect a lot of good artists will show up with some interesting things to say. Good luck in whatever you do, seriously.
Anyway, my situation was different to yours. Only listen to what ive said as a story from someone else who did something sort of similar. You have to make the decision as to whether its right for you.
My advice to you is IF you do it, but dont become completely reliant on your girlfriend, because you dont want to wreck your relationship just to get better at 3d.
Firstly, I would get completely up to speed on the new techniques WHILE you are still working. Model and texture small props from start to finish to get familiar with the full pipeline, or watch all the tutorials you can if you aare too tired to actually make stuff. You want to hit the ground running as soon as you quit, not be learning large topics still.
Finally, I would still try and work one or two days a week. When you dont have a job, it is easy to become lazy in front of the computer, as it seems you have all the time in the world. When you have a job to go to, even just 2 days a week, you value your free time more. An added benefit is you still have some money coming in too, so your girlfriend will see you are trying on all fronts, not just lazing around at home :P
I have done something similar, basically my gf got a job after finishing her studies but it was in another town. So I decided to quit my industry job that I had for over 4yrs and further my 3d skills. I moved in with my gf in the new town and I worked on my portfolio for around 8 months. Fortunately things worked out for us as I got a job at another studio when I was ready.
These, I believe were the important factors that helped:
- I had savings
- stable relationship with my gf
- I already had industry experience
- Before I left my job I was already doing personal work, I had gained some momentum, so leaving the job was to continue with the flow.
- I helped with house chores/support.
I think what you can do now while you are still working is to do focused mini exercises that don't take too long, get the workflow, techniques and understandings down. It's almost like getting warmed up so that if you do take time off you are just spending most of the time creating the portfolio rather than figuring things out. You've done all the figuring out on the mini exercises, it's about being efficient with your time off.
To see if you are able to be disciplined to work on your portfolio perhaps try and take 1 week holiday off work and see if you can focus.
If you do it be open with your gf, let her know there will be times when you are just sat in front of the PC for hours. There will be times where it seems your portfolio or skills has not progressed at all, there's no tangible evidence of this investment to show her. But it's there it's just that it normally happens right at the end where it all comes together.
It can be worth it and it was for me but you have to prepare for it and have the right mindset, I spun it in my head thinking "well athletes have to train before competitions, I'm just doing the same thing"
Anyway hope that helps.
Apart from non-paying projects I got no responses out of dozens and dozens of e-mails, which is kinda depressing.
When I worked I also tried to build a portfolio and learn something new, but I found it impossible to focus for self-improvement - I did take some freelancing projects though, so perhaps getting paid is a motivation factor. Seeing that that job lead to nowhere, I switched to part-time and had two days off, but still it wasn't very different - having a four day weekend made me postpone things a lot, and when I'd start, it was time to go to work.
After I quit my job things changed, and in about a week I was working 10 hours a day and I found my motivation. That was the hardest part in the end, and if I had it while working I could have kept my job and learn at the same time.
You spent a year on the couch and three years in a shitty job. From what you wrote, it sounds like you need external motivation.
A better option might be going to school where there is a structure that forces you to complete tasks.
I have a full-time job (which I mostly love) and a family and I still crank out asset packages regularly. You only need a couple hours a day to create something or challenge yourself. I've even started using my lunch break to make particle textures on my iPod which I've used in my next asset package.
My job is cream of the crop shit and motivates me to work harder so I can get the hell out of it, I have cut my hours back to 30 a week which has been great.
Quit the job and knuckle down, you can do it :thumbup:
IMO it had to be done, the job was crushing me, i worked nights 10pm to 6am, so i was always lethargic and run down which left no time or motivation to do art work.
One day i was sick of sulking about how i'm going no where with my art, and then and there i applied for uni, got in, quit said job work somewhere else part time (during the day thank fuck) to pay for food and such.
TLDR; If you gotta do it, and you really want to do it. Do it.
If i did it all over again i would, but maybe i would add a bit more security to the move, probably wont get that full time job back if shit goes belly up with uni.
Get a home based part-time job taking pizza orders (or whatever take out service in your location that hires offsite phone operators). Company gives you their proprietary software.
You only work the night shift and you can do your upgrading while waiting for the calls.
Woah, that's a really awesome idea for anyone.
Yup. Commission per sale. Rate where I live starts at $11 Canadian/ $10.38 U.S. You don't have to take every order (if you have to take a dump or feel like humping your significant other during your shift). Even if you just make 10 sales out of a six hour shift, that can work to approximately $18 Cdn/hr. x 6 hours. You just gotta provide your own PC(s), headset, and a "quiet" environment to take orders.
And...if you're a hustler you can take on more "accounts".
Working smart > working hard :thumbup:
So I guess my advice is try to have objective aims, getting "good" is so subjective that it could demotivate you even if you were getting a loads of work done. There are tonnes of guys even on Polycount who don't consider themselves "good" enough to start job hunting but in reality would get snapped up instantly. Try and set yourself realistic goals to get a portfolio together in 6 months or so, but be honest with yourself and what you expect to achieve.
Best of luck!
if you do it, do everything you can to maintain strong feedback loops. post everything you do on as many relevant forums as you can, send people WIPs on skype, etc. feedback from others is critical to getting the most out of your time spent practicing, and it's the only motivator you'll have besides yourself, which can sometimes mean the difference between doing more work or watching youtube videos.
whatever you decide to do, good luck
I have a contact list of people I can get honest brutal crits from on anything I do, friends/colleagues like that help a lot. I would recommend you do the same.
And post on PC.
Again thanks for the added feedback it's very good to hear the other sides of similar stories. Aye the feedback loops are a big part of the plan, and after spending 4 years in drudgery central I'm more then motivated to change things up and keep at it.
But it needs to be solid, so i'm adding all this in the information pool.
Thsi is epic guide. I think it should be sticked somewhere on this forum.
god I have entered that spiral quite a few times when left on my own! one of the hardest pitfalls to avoid.
2 of the best jobs I have had were running a cybercafe, I just took money and entered numbers into the accounts, 95% of my time was free on a PC, Another job was Night time construction site security, had wifi a laptop, was on my own with 12 hrs to kill, entering a code every hour, got through a shit load of UDK tutorials, improved my drawing, read half a dozen books and even was putting in a good workout 4-5 days a week while the money piles up so I could get all the upgrades I wanted for doing next to nothing except taking a look round now and then.
id say go for it, but also look out for a job you can work around, theres plenty of them out there like the guy said the pizza job above, theres nothing better than getting paid to just better yourself even if its minimum wage in whatever your ambition is.
I hope that doesn't make you feel bad about what choice you have to make, that's just my opinion - its ok to think "well my eyes are on the prize, all I have to do is get a solid enough folio for a job" but your mental health plays a big part in it as well. Its good that you're trying to weigh up your options and get as much advice as you can to make a informed decision, I wish you the best of luck with what you do and keep us updated with what happens
I dunno man, you say that, and logical processes would perhaps agree with you but I am sure it would feel emasculating if you had to rely on your girlfriend or wife, while you are off doing what you please whether its working on a goal or not, and I don't mean to put down anyone who has done that in anyway but as a man and a fiercely independent person I just couldn't imagine mooching off someone I care about in that way, nor do I want to become beholden to someone or make any of my failures their own, far far better to get a part time job to support yourself, sell some stuff on shapeways, repair some computers, it's important to contribute in a relationship, its a complex dynamic.
trying to make no overly zealous judgements on other peoples relationships but I just could never be content with that situation would eat at me, and all your girlfriends friends are bound to think you are a loser if all your doing (at least all they will see you are doing) is fucking around on a computer and living off your girlfriend, we have all probably known one of those guys, or even girls, and theres a deep question to be asked if you are okay with being one of those people?
Me personally the crushing social stigma and drain on the self esteem would occupy more of my time and take me further away from my art than a part time job would, its bad enough if just you get the thoughts of being a failure when something is not going your way, its another thing to feel like being a failure and everyone else generally thinks you are.
so its something to consider, not saying its applicable, seriously trying not to make judgements just some food for thought, Morale accounts for a lot in what you do, its that energy to get up in the day and get on.
That isn't a successful and healthy relationship, its a pissing match. Find someone who will have your back and stick with you and support the things you do. Do the same for them and you'll be in a much better place.
If you two can afford it and she's on board and you think you can stay focused I think you should go for it. But it takes a dedicated person to dig in and improve on their own. Don't sit around waiting for inspiration to strike, you'll waste your time. Besides no boss allows people to sit around and wait for inspiration. That ability to dig deep and do good work no matter what, is really important. It's not all fun projects, sometimes its about getting through the boring stuff to get to the good stuff and you won't last long if you drag your feet or half ass the boring stuff.
I'm not judging anyone if they choose to do that - if the couple are ok with it that's awesome, by all means they should go for it
Near the end of college I got an internship at SOE for 3 months working on EverQuest 1 which just had its 10th birthday. It was the only internship spot open so I gladly took it. At the end of the internship they offered to keep me on as a contract artist and let me know after doing that for a bit full time was a possibility. I realized working on EQ1 wasnt what I wanted to do, no offense to the team as they were awesome people to learn from but I wanted to do better things, and work on amamzing projects. So I declined there offer and decided to finish up my last month of school and just be unemployed for a while until I found a job.
For many this was a CRAZY thing to do as it was right around the 09 awfulness of the industry where lots of people were out of jobs and finding one wasnt easy. But still I knew I wouldnt settle for just anything just to have a job, I wanted the best.
So I spent the next 3 months just working on polishing up my folio, working 6 days a week on it, for at least 8 hours a day. I dont think working on 3d art 7 days a week is smart at all, I think you should always take a break, and go out in the world an experience things competly unrelated to 3d and video games to get a mental break from your art work and a different perspective/enviornment on things.
It was very easy to spend 8 hours a day working on my folio as I loved what I did, and I would just wake up the same time as my roommate (who accepted a contract position at SOE after we both interned together) and worked until he came home, and usually longer after that as well.
I gave up playing video games the entire last year of college, the only game I played was Uncharted 2. I never watched TV in our living room and netflix wasn't really a huge streaming thing yet, so no time watching TV, your shows can wait. I constantly passed up opportunities to see movies with friends and just go out as I was focused on my goal. I knew I was giving up fun for a few months with friends who would understand for a life time of happyness at work was well worth it.
You need a LOT of self discipline here, you cant fall into traps of playing video games, watching tv or hanging out with friends. Nor can you give into that bullshit excuse of "lack of motivation", I'm sorry but people who are unmotivated are lazy people who are only unmotivated because things are not easy right off the bat for them and they have to struggle.
I was mainly working on one environment making it the best it could possibly be, but I was also working on small little assets that I could do in 1 to 3 days as you learn a ton taking a project from start all the way to completion. I would learn a lot after finishing each small asset and while many never made it into my folio, the knowledge I gained from doing them was huge. Not to mention that feeling of accomplishment of actually finishing something. Sometimes when trying to make an envio you can spend months on it and see only a little progress and that hurts your motivation.
Anyway, after about 3 months of just working on my folio I got an art test for Bungie for a 3d prop position and with a lot of luck and magic I turned that art test for a 3d prop position into an environment artist position
Edit: During this time I had no job, and I survived money wise off my student loans and help from my mom. I had no problem having to get money from my mom to help keep me afloat while I chased my dream, if your GF is willing to do the same you would be a down right fool to pass it up as in the end its all worth it.
This sounds the best approach to me, You gotta be happy to work on stuff in your spare time or its just not worth it, and finding a better job sounds like top priority. Personally I couldnt take money off someone that isnt my parents and not feel incredibly guilty but thats just me.
I too quit an industry job and took some portfolio time. I had done a year and a bit in my first industry job as a VFX artist and alot of stuff happend which made me realise that I wasnt happy. I hated where I lived, couldnt afford to move out on my own away from idiot flatmates, saw myself being typecasted as a vfx artist within the studio when I knew I wanted to do characters (VFX peeps are hard to find and studios tend to hold onto them), my partner needed to move back home to help her folks out of bankrupcy. So I thought I would leave, maybe do a few months portfolio building and then find my feet closer to home and get that work/home balance right. The studio was amazing, offered me pay rises and character work to keep me, but I knew that I would be back to doing VFX most of the time.....I also wasnt very good or confident in my art at the time, especially with the amazing character team they already had.
So took the plunge, I prepared by saving up a few bob and getting my deposit back from my flat aswell as all my holiday pay. Moved back with my folks and was so happy to be back. I worked 10 hour days, 5 days a week on my portfolio, sending off CVs, emails, networking, the works. It felt good, felt like starting again, learning everything from scratch, and now knowing what the big boys were doing I could aim high. I got to make my own art for once and not worry about anything else distracting or pulling me away from the computer.
I was also not very clever to do this when the recession started haha, so 3 months turned into 6, 6 turned into 9, 9 turned into 12. I had a few interviews and alot of interest, but it was always from the wrong places, like overseas or companies on the brink of bankruptcy or working on some boring title etc. I learnt recruiters were a waste of time and space and that if I wanted to find work I had to push myself more and more and MOAR AND MOAR!!! each day. It was incredibly stressful throughout, not knowing whats going to happen, should I give up, should I go work at asda or get my old job back at blockbusters haha. So you do have to take a day or two here and there to regroup.
And then just as my money started to run out I started getting freelance work. It wasnt enough to pay the bills but it soon was, a year later I started working with Slide and it was unlike any other company I had worked for prior, and then that became constant, a year later and they made me senior
So I do look back at it being the best thing I ever did, it was also the toughest though, and theres no gaurantees its gonna work. I'm not a very confident person either, I keep to myself most of the time and so was weird trying to promote myself the whole time, in the end I just tried to make cool stuff and hope people liked it, make the art do all the talking, I have no connections so :poly122: I was lucky in that I saved up before doing it and as autocon says, the self discipline you gain is amazing. But you do need that drive to get you going, if you are unmotivated to do stuff now then you gotta find that spark again before doing it, my advice would be to fall back in love with your art, set time aside each day to do your own thing, an hour before work here and there is a perfect example. Nobody does anything in this time so why not be productive with it
also remember this; from stephen silver!!!
no point in polishing a turd, thats why I get annoyed when people moan at people for not finishing stuff, if the idea isnt there then its not going to work!! aslong as you learn from it then theres no time wasted imo
Aye I agree with the feelings of dependencies of others it can be a source of motivation to do it right, but it can also lead to as sense of pressure, even though my GF is 100% supportive in this.
I'll post my findings on these as well, as I see a lot of people did something similar as well, and others might be considering to do also.
That last line is so perfect. Sorry, this has nothing to do with the actual thread. But you managed to put that into words that I just could not. Cheers
From my experience I think 4-5 months is unrealistic. I planned for a year working on my port and I got a job after a year and a half. Did I waste some time? Sure. I did some freelance and moved out of state during that time. But it just takes a long ass time to learn... then to actually make something port worthy with it... then to actually fine a job.
Having a plan is different from being a deadbeat.
Follow your dreams but remember they may turn out to be a nightmare. Your mileage may vary but the biggest regret you will ever have is to be old and not have tried. I'm soo glad I did it, even though I am no longer in the industry because I don't wonder 'what if' anymore.. And I'm good with that, and much happier now that I am on the other side of it.
That's a really good point Jeremy, as another example of that I imagine a lot of people (myself included) also dreamed of stuff like working for a massive company when they first got into games, but as you work and learn more about the industry itself you might be more inclined to prefer a smaller studio - more appreciation from peers and more of a say in the artwork, rather than working in a big studio and being a small cog in a big wheel.... but I digress
I agree. Don't underestimate start ups who'll pay you a salary. Even if they're in an industry that's only tangential to gamedev (e-learning, military e-training, medical visualisation), I recommend giving it a shot as you climb your way towards the bigger badder studios out there.
Aside from aiming to acquire an attractive portfolio, you should also consider lining up your cv/resume with professional recommendations/contacts and getting mentorship potential from more experienced artists.
Damn, one year and a half is pretty scary.
I did what you did, it's been 5 months now. I wanted to take 6 months, but time flies indeed and i did not learn and practice as much as I hoped to.
In the end it worked out for you so I guess all that time you spent was needed.
(But i hope I won't need one year and a half myself haha)