Spending your time outside of work
Having now worked in the games industry for a year and a half it recently occurred to me how much "free time" I spend actually doing what I do at work, making art basically. For some reason I have felt the need for the past 5/6 months to spend as much of my free time making art at home and developing skills/improving my portfolio. Now I am aware that this helps alot and I have learnt alot from spending this time doing this however I really haven't spent anytime actually playing games, which before I started in the industry was easily my largest past time. However recently I just feel a need to keep improving and spending all my time getting better, If I don't it almost feels like wasted time. My question is does anyone else feel like this or have some of you found that ideal happy medium?
Replies
Because, at the end of the day, thats living. If all youre ever doing is practicing to get better at a job, well thats great to work for an awesome company making great games, but really, its still just a job in an office?
#rant begins#
The 90s is gone, youll never work with john carmack in a vest in a tiny office stuffed with beer cans and metallica posters knowing you guys are going to turn out something that will change the world. That is worth busting your balls for.
The era of corporate production is here, the multibillions, the greed, the disposability! Most of us are pawns in much richer peoples games, so why do we spend our time when we should be having fun, improving our skills for an industry that regards us as an asset at best, a disposable tool like a toaster at worst, designed to be used until it breaks, then replaced.
Finally, i notice that a lot of the guys who have been doing this a long time place a big emphasis on the rest of their lives being important, family, hobbies, sport etc, and maybe thats a healthy balance for not burning out, and having a well rounded mind and body at work too.
Btw, this is not an angry rant, I am often in the same dilemma! Just splurging some (probably conflicted) thoughts on a page i guess. Weird industry.
I am off climbing in the mountains for a week today. If I get back in one piece, Ill tell you if it was worth it, or if i shouldve stayed home drawing
A lot of the seasoned vets at my studio focus heavily on their personal lives especially with family. They enjoy games of course, but having a balanced life so you don't burn out at work is super important. And yes, at the end of the day, it's just a job, even if you're really proud of the work you're doing. Your life is so much more important.
I too have a huge backlog of games. Maybe Valve will give me an award for all my donations because I haven't touched many of the games I bought.
My thoughts are bust your ass at improving until you get work at a studio - once you have something a bit more stable you won't have to put so much pressure on working every minute of every day!
There will be a time in which you have a stable job(at least, as stable as it gets in this industry) and you will not have to put so much time into personal work. Until you get there though, you've got to put in the time, that's the only possible way you get to that point, nothing else, just putting in the time. I know I struggled with the guilt of not working on stuff, but you have to get over it, it's not the end of the world if you miss a night, it will be there tomorrow. Just dedicated yourself to making a small improvement every day, even if you don't work, watch a quick tutorial, read up on some new tech, just do something.
^QFT awesome post, I'm glad other people feel the same way.
What torch says & Or you all can keep tooling It up whatever you enjoy most. Edit: I know some people don't have a choice, I don't mean you.
I took a 6 mile walk today awesome weather, so glad I did it felt awesome when I got back.
Your post reminded me of the new 3dsmax thread with the videos about them talking about the 2014 release, man those dudes look tired talking about the new stuff ... feel sorry for them I saw it in their faces and eyes.
Now I play video games rarely after work, maybe only an hour or two tops. I like to spend my time with my wife and dogs, lounging around, watching movies, etc.
I still occasionally do some personal work after work, but usually if it was a breezy day that went by fast. Long days take it out of me and I prefer to go home and relax.
Everything in life is about balance.
For me, I always want to art and improve my craft; just in the past month I've learned so freaking much it's unbelievable...but I definitely have days where I'm just like "I don't care if I'm sketching, working on personal projects, or even going in to work and doing work, I just want to ART." And then I have my days where all I want to do is socialize and see people
For me, a healthy medium ground is having a week or phase of each...split up your month (don't schedule it, just let it happen naturally) doing what makes you happy, between being social and creating art.
I definitely have had moments where my interests conflict. There have been several times I'm with friends and just want to go home and work, and vice versa. I very much enjoy my amazing girlfriend, so there has only been a couple times I've really wanted to art when I'm with her, but she likes watching me draw or texture, so it works out
Just make sure that, in your spare time, it doesn't matter what you are doing, just do whatever it is that makes you happy and gives your mind a rest. It's very easy to push yourself to hard and burn out WITHOUT you even realizing it. You can find yourself on Friday and be like "wow, I really wasn't that productive this week, I need a break." As long as you are doing what makes you happy and brings joy to yourself, it's only going to enhance yourself as a person and make you want to work that much harder.
It's all about balancing your lifestyle to meet YOUR needs to make you the most efficient and ready to absorb knowledge and learn, whether it's from others or your own mistakes.
As for me and gaming...I really, really miss playing games...mostly, I feel like I just haven't found any games to capture my undivided attention in a compelling way, like the Darksiders series, Anything Zelda; anything with great gameplay, a good story, and advancement that's satisfying to me. I preordered guild wars 2, played every beta, and I've played 3 days since it's official release date...Granted, my priorities have changed as far as what I like to do; my girl is very much my number 1 priority and I'd rather spend quality time with her than play a game any day, but even when the times come where she's working or we don't see each other, I find myself wanting to make art more than actually playing games
Guess I can stop waiting for Darksiders 3 to get me back into gaming
*edit*
Holy crap I talk to much
Overall, I just wish I had MORE time. I really do enjoy working on art, but when I'm working on 3d, I wish I had more time to do 2d. I've probably played through a total of two new games in the past three years, since when I'm not working on the computer, I want to be as far away from it as possible.
I bought a new piano earlier this year and right now I'm working on two Chopin preludes. I try to get out and find things to take photos of, but I kinda really hate where I live, so that gets tough. Right now my boyfriend is crunching pretty hard at work, so I tend to spend the earlier part of the evening working on my personal projects, then he comes by later and we'll watch a bit of television or a movie.
I have a personal trainer and go to the gym a few times a week, and he's been telling me to run like 6 days a week after work, and I just can't seem to find the time for it (though I realllly need to).
I try to find a good balance, and although I think I've come a long way from when every moment of my life was working during school, it always seems like there's never enough time for doing all of the things I want.
Sometimes I wonder for the people who feel this way, that Indies don't exist in their philosophy. Games like NS2 are an aberration versus a sign of a new outlook coming.
Skankerzero is an example here proving that the corporate A/AAA is not our only choice.
I always get the knot in my stomach that I should be doing something productive and I don't think that feelings ever going to go away. It has meant that I don't get much game time and that the games I do play seem to need to be super mega blockbusters or I see it as a waste due to me not getting anything out of it. Ni no kuni was great for example but I couldn't get into it because of this.
I think I'm still in the freelancer mindset and anyone who has done it will know how much work you put in to stay current and the worry of not making enough money even when you find something more stable.
A good lazy day here and there is always good though
still possible. There's tons of small 10-30 people studios that make innovative games.
balance is very important in this industry, but its up to you on what that balance includes.
For some people the balance is made up of stuff that counters work, for others its made up of stuff that compliments work. Just have that balance.
This doesn't mean spending all of your time worrying about work or trying to create art and studying. That can be terribly unhealthy. I always feel the need to improve and drive myself forward, but I make sure to separate myself from work from time to time.
I used to funnel some of that extra anxiety and energy into doing quick studies and sculpts during my lunch hours at work, or whenever I could scrape a bit of extra time. I find a lot of satisfaction from the art I create at work, so I don't carry that extra weight anymore. When I'm at home or with family, I stay away from it.
You might not be doing things at work that are stimulating and satisfying your creative needs. If you feel unfulfilled because of this, try making a new environment piece or some cool props/textures. Grab some paper and start drawing and studying. Make something cool and you'll feel a lot better.
Nearly everyone here will tell you that getting away from work is as important as striving for excellence. Finding a good balance can be tough. Good luck !
cut to 5 years later, I never do personal work at home, I have pretty much accepted that doing 8 hours of cg a day is enough to keep me satisfied on that front. I spend time on PC for sure because of all the interesting stuff on here but rarley post art. and I am totally fine and relaxed about that. I know a lot of people have the attitude of always constantly needing to improve and be kick ass at art. I am confident in my skills and would rather spend that time making my life far more well rounded.
Especially since I moved to montreal I have made it my goal to amp my social life to the next level and enjoy the time I am not at work. Last summer i got heavily into pickup and had an insanely fun summer and at the end of it wound up with a super cool girlfriend I wouldnt have been able to get without all that previous social experience. on a side note, all this also helped improve my work relations with people, helped me speak up with authority instead of holding my tounge and also make some awesome new friends from being more outgoing.
The awesome thing about this city is there is almost always something going on so its easy to go out and check out a show, party or experience some cool cultural event that you stubmle on walking down the street. All that stuff combied has not only vastly increased my self confidence and social skills but also makes me feel way more awake and alive than when I would work, go home and sit infront of a computer for another 8 hours. I would highly suggest it to anyone feeling in a routine.
I also started learning how to DJ around 6 months ago now and am loving that shit. so if I am at home after a day at work I am usually found behind the mixer spinning some fun house beats, amping up to go out or post a funky new mix for others to enjoy. Thats where I get some more creative satisfaction and enjoy it just as much if not more than CG. the cool thing is while im at work I am thinking about new tunes to mix and while I am DJ'ing I usually am stoked to do some more CG the next day.
I could keep talking about this stuff for a huge post but its already getting to wall of text style so Ill just wrap with this: The best thing I have done in the last couple years was to look at the areas of my life I was disatisfied with and then utillized my free time to force myself to change it. it was awkward, painful, exciting and awesome and totally satisfying. I found time flying by and my lifestyle improving to match my personal goals and expectations. that said there is still tons more to do