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tomb raider 8

polycounter lvl 18
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killingpeople polycounter lvl 18
i'm surprised this has caught my attention. *pew-pew*
alison-carroll-croft-8118-16.jpg
well... not surprised it caught my attention...

screenU_32.jpg
... but surprised that it's held it long enough to actually consider playing the next installment of the milking-house of a franchise.

in my case, they got me with the new laura croft poster-girl. she's cute. images and videos have been circling around.

hyauHa!
alison-carroll-croft-8118-4.jpg
i mean that's hawt! ... right? kinda *ahem* ... anyway

because i don't like when an IP is dragged in the mud and milked. the reason for a sequel is to make money. most production-house game has this purpose. chances are there is no message and there isn't respect or much regards for anything other than the goal of making money. it would take a pretty athletic hot chick to get me into it.

the first tomb raider was the only i remember enjoying. i loved how it created this simulated seclusion and adventure in amazing unseen places and ... well, i love big tits and a nice ass on a cute face. i don't remember which of the others i've played, i just remember associating them with frustration and distaste. never being engaged in their story. i hated fighting people in their games. it seemed a lot cooler fighting animals and being out rather than set against some evil archeologist.

the last time playing anything tome raider was a demo, i think, on XBLA. it was awfully sub par on all levels.

from what i've seen of tomb raider 8, "underworld" it will still have a shitty story. i'll give a nod for trying for a more evil laura. apparently her "good person" side conflicts with her "adventure for shiny things" side. meh, okay... honestly, i'd just throw it all out. i would prefer no character dialog and just running a hot chick around badical looking tombs. i give a fuck about a failed writer disguised as a game designer's story line.

all i want is sweet acrobatics resulting in flipping past enraged bears, mountain lions, and bodacious ta-tas. how can people think story is necessarily important to a game? "the story is so good i'm gunna fight through these unreasonably shitty gameplay mechanics just to continue the epic tale!" whatever, blah-blah-blah. i'm just an artist.

the actual trailers and gameplay footage i had seen since the release of hot 23 year old gymnast didn't really get me going either. but i did see this video, and it sparked some hope:
[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ChpCJtzExIs]Tomb Raider: Underworld (Thailand BETA Gameplay)[/ame]

apparently it's still in beta. looks like they have some nav camera issues and the combat looks like it's not working very good...

i wanted to try and say something good about the new one, so hopefully i've managed to. it's hard after all she's put me through. i think underworld just might not royally suck. only time will tell.

your impressions?

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  • Wells
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    Wells polycounter lvl 18
    my impressions:

    she needs to do a flip after launching herself from the conveniently placed bar? really?

    climbing looks nice, anyways. though it comes off as more of a navigational chore than, say, Assassins Creed [which I still have a boner from].

    oh look, more parallel bars. that don't sway when she's swinging on them.

    hey, tigers! oh fuck, evil tigers! yay, running and gunning. OMG BULLET TIME?!!11!

    hmm... jump to a tiny platform in the middle of a void. always fun. oh look, he fucked it up, too.

    Where the fuck are the dinosaurs and bears. give me a damn bearsaur. i don't give a fuck if it is historically and ethically inaccurate. god damnit.

    Lara's looking nice. I like her arms. yeah, I said it. wanna fight about it?
  • Joseph Silverman
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    Joseph Silverman polycounter lvl 17
    It looks like playing through my favorite part of shadow of the collosus with worse controls and less exciting platforming.

    That said, the overall game has my interest. I like platformers that pretend they're grounded in realism. Or anything near realism. hell, grounded in live action movies.
  • Ruz
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    Ruz polycount lvl 666
    looks a little dull.

    A full 3 and a half minutes wandering around a large environment. Not really a game more of a walk through in a large landscape.

    killing tigers is a chore, but I will probably still buy as I have played them all so far.

    I really hope its not all like this ie endless shimmying across ledges. how is that fun?

    artworks really nice though, even on low res youtube
  • Darth Tomi
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    Darth Tomi polycounter lvl 12
    I'm actually looking forward to it. Even if it doesn't surpass anything I've played before. I liked Legend and the reworking of Anniversary. I hope they fix the minor glitches tho, like jumping to a ledge, completely missing it and falling to your death, even tho you were RIGHT THERE. Oh well. They need to make the mansion larger and more explorable as well. Either way Lara looks good as always. :P
  • East
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    East polycounter lvl 14
    Darth Tomi wrote: »
    They need to make the mansion larger and more explorable as well.
    From the teaser it looks like they've made the mansion more explode-able :p
  • Blaizer
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    Blaizer interpolator
    i love the water :P, looks so refreshing!

    I think Tigers are very typical for thailand, they fit well, and it's more of the same, alway killing animals and guys with weapons that want the treasures. Better graphics and that's all.

    I bought tomb raider: anniversary and i didn't pass the first level, quite boring for me.

    climbing game :P
  • Kevin Johnstone
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    Kevin Johnstone polycounter lvl 19
    Looks fantastic to me, I loved Legend, 1st time in a decade I felt it was worth looking back
    and was surprised just how pretty and fun it was. Can't wait for this one, my daughter loves playing these ones with me :)
  • moose
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    moose polycount sponsor
    im excited! the last two refreshes of tomb raider have been great. Legends was a lot smoother than the anniversary one... but whatever :) just hope it is longer than Legends!

    I cant wait :)

    my only problem with the previous games is they were too too tooooooo easy, and when they really started getting fun & challenging... the game ended (ie: the snow level in legends).
  • EarthQuake
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    this tiger murder simulator looks pretty sweet
  • adam
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    adam polycounter lvl 19
    She needs to tan her vagina.
  • ebagg
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    ebagg polycounter lvl 17
    adamBrome wrote: »
    She needs to tan her vagina.

    HAHAHAHA! Exactly what I was thinking! Or at least get a photoshop artist in there for color correction.

    Personally I couldn't care less about Tomb Raider, I got TR: Legend or whatever the last PS2 title was for $10, but I'm not going to rush out and buy one brand new. If I want a game with sweet acrobatics I'll stick to checking out the new Prince of Persia game, at least they took a fresh approach at the game. Do we really need to keep raiding tombs?
  • rooster
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    rooster mod
    legend was great imo, looking forward to this plenty
  • Joshua Stubbles
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    Joshua Stubbles polycounter lvl 19
    SO MUCH HAWTER


    LaraCroft.png
  • almighty_gir
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    almighty_gir ngon master
    holy shit, it's Assassins creed...
  • ElysiumGX
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    ElysiumGX polycounter lvl 18
    Sorry kp. Reading your post was difficult. All it said was "wah wah I haven't been paying attention and I need a girlfriend big time".

    This isn't so much about milking sequels. The whole franchise has been revitalized since being given to Crystal Dynamics.

    I remember playing Tomb Raider Gold many years ago. Back then, the game was exciting. Every one since then was worse than the previous, or just all out boring. Although, I actually enjoyed Chronicles. It got to the point where Angel of Darkness was given to me for free, but I simply wouldn't play it.

    Enter Crystal Dynamics. Legend and Anniversary are great games. They looks and feel exciting, like playing the first all over again. Which, in Anniversay, you are. Lara's new look is more youthful and intelligent, and the environments looks amazing.

    So yeah, I'm eager to play Underworld. It looks great. And the Crystal Dynamics guys have shown they know how to properly handle the franchise.

    So, stop looking at tan lines, and go play the 2 games in this new continuity before making your judgments about a game that hasn't been released yet.
  • almighty_gir
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    almighty_gir ngon master
    shame they are putting so much effort into this, instead of a new Legacy of Kain game...

    i need to know that Raziel is ok >_<
  • Cody
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    Cody polycounter lvl 15
    adamBrome wrote: »
    She needs to tan her vagina.
    Hahahaha. Ya, that is the most awkward airborne pose I've ever seen.
  • arshlevon
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    arshlevon polycounter lvl 18
    shame they are putting so much effort into this, instead of a new Legacy of Kain game...

    i need to know that Raziel is ok >_<

    as far as i am concerned Amy Hennig was Legacy of Kain, and now she is at naughty dog, so you might want to pick up uncharted and pretend everyone is a vampire.
  • rube
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    rube polycounter lvl 17
    I really enjoyed the last 2 Tomb Raiders so I'm looking forward to this one
  • hawken
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    hawken polycounter lvl 19


    hyauHa!
    alison-carroll-croft-8118-4.jpg


    your impressions?

    OMG the photo is hideous! poor girl. Cover it up.
  • RazorBladder
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    RazorBladder polycounter lvl 18
    Seems bizarre they'd release that photo when it's blatantly one for the bin.

    I'm kinda looking forward to this game, honestly though, I wish they'd actually get Jolie to do the voice acting, I'm sure it'd hurt the bank but whoever has done the voice work for the past couple of games gives me the cheesy unconvincing shudders.

    I wholey agree on the LoK thing, shame hennig is @ naughtydog, wasn't much of a fan of uncharted despite Simon Templeman doing voice work :P
  • Gav
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    Gav quad damage
    Jesus christ, turn down the vagina bloom.

    I really enjoy the Tomb Raider games...mostly because I like mindless, jump here, shoot that, blah blah type games. Basically, it's the closest thing I could get to the Sands of Time that wasn't full of emo shit. I'll probably pick this one up...
  • almighty_gir
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    almighty_gir ngon master
    LoK was the first game series that got me so involved i actually felt some form of emotion for the characters.

    like feeling sympathetic, and sad, for raziel toward the end.
    hatred for Moebius and his master...

    i r sad =[
  • RazorBladder
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    RazorBladder polycounter lvl 18
    Why would u feel sad for him when he comes to realise his true noble purpose as the purified soul of the soul reaver to arm kain for his "true endeavour"? Sure he was manipulated to high heaven by Moebius/EldarGod/Hylden. Seems as though Raziel's story is finished to me, would've liked to have seen Kain kick the shit out of the Eldar "God" properly and see the "hope" he speaks of at the end.

    Bah, Off-Topic, sorry :/
  • bluekangaroo
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    bluekangaroo polycounter lvl 13
    adamBrome wrote: »
    She needs to tan her vagina.

    naw man, i think its hot. I love the tan lined vagine
  • nacire
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    nacire polycounter lvl 17
    Being a big fan of the original, I though Legend was a great revamping and I absolutely loved Anniversary. Seeing all of my old favs brought into current gen was awesome. I'm really looking forward to this one.
  • vahl
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    vahl polycounter lvl 18
    I liked Legend and anniversary a lot, very good game, and I think every TR between 2 and legend are crap
  • robioto
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    robioto polycounter lvl 18
    She needs to remember to spray that tanning crap on her crotchal region. Right now it looks like an armpit.
  • Ruz
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    Ruz polycount lvl 666
    tombraider core years - loved them all
    tombraider crystal dynamics - still nice but different kind of game
  • TWilson
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    TWilson polycounter lvl 18
    killing tigers? really?

    shimmy shimmy sham

    how about some puzzles?

    looks pretty though.
  • HonkyPunch
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    HonkyPunch polycounter lvl 18
    Tomb Raider is made of butt
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