Tales of San Francisco, Pt. 17
polycounter lvl 18
I was standing at a street corner waiting for the signal to walk. I had a Walgreen's humidifier in one hand and a fluffy Warhammer 40k novel in the other. My mind was focused on getting home to play WoW and eat some tasty Indian food. The moment was calm, 9:30pm on a well-lit, well-traveled street, not in the best part of town but neither in the worst. When I heard the mumbling homeless crazy man approaching from the left, I resolved not to look his way unless directly addressed, and then only to shake my head no, I didn't have any spare change for him. This is a fairly standard plan, as street skills go. The encounter would've been standard, overall, had he not broken the usual routine to punch me in the face.
Right! He punched me!
In the face!!
Still mumbling, he turned to wander off, leaving me to wonder how one is supposed to respond to something like that. After a moment, it came to me: "what the FUCK?!" and then, when there was no response, "you ... you ... fucking asshole!"
It wasn't a particularly hard punch, but it felt solid enough and my cheek rang for two blocks. He was big and crazy, not small, weedy and crazy, and I expect the punch could've been both more heartfelt, and skull-felt. His size probably accounts for my limiting my reaction to a cry of outrage directed at his back, then hurrying away in the opposite direction.
Top that for random fuckupedness, won't you?
Right! He punched me!
In the face!!
Still mumbling, he turned to wander off, leaving me to wonder how one is supposed to respond to something like that. After a moment, it came to me: "what the FUCK?!" and then, when there was no response, "you ... you ... fucking asshole!"
It wasn't a particularly hard punch, but it felt solid enough and my cheek rang for two blocks. He was big and crazy, not small, weedy and crazy, and I expect the punch could've been both more heartfelt, and skull-felt. His size probably accounts for my limiting my reaction to a cry of outrage directed at his back, then hurrying away in the opposite direction.
Top that for random fuckupedness, won't you?
Replies
Random, no words exchanged.
Do I win?
Anyone who throws punches and/or uses a machete on someone is quite far from being a gentle man.
BTW Who the fuck walks around with a FUCKING MACHETE!!!!!
There have been many occasions (but no major incidents touch wood) that I've been walking down somewhere like market st, or 6th st, or shit, a heck of a lot of other streets in this town when I've just been overwhelmed with the skankiness of it all and just thought 'fuck this hole, it's a fucking dump. I'm done with it'. Then I have other occasions like a couple of weekends ago when I cycled with my gf through the marina, across the gg bridge and down into Sausalito and had a beer on the ferry on the way back overwhelmed by the sheer beauty of the place.
It's such a cliche I suppose but it really is a town of extremes. Your story sucks. I think I've been lucky so far.
There have been many occasions (but no major incidents touch wood) that I've been walking down somewhere like market st, or 6th st
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hehe ... funny you should say that, this happened at 6th and Market. That's about the right spot for most things I guess!
Yeah, I was prepared to say "fuck SF" after I got home and had a few minutes to turn the shock into a frothing rage, but it didn't take long for treacherous memory to point out that I've had as many really nice times here as I've had bad ones. San Francisco doesn't let you stick with an extreme impression long enough to set on it. It's like the world's cutest, fluffiest, most purry-wurringest widdle kitty-cat, who likes to shit in your mouth while you sleep. You wake up vomiting foulness but there's a happy cuddle no further than arm's length.
j/k
That's agreeably fucked up. Personally I would have done much more, but I'm not you. I've never really been fucked with when I'm on the streets.... even in Detroit. I'm 6'5" and about 270lb... then again, maybe I've just been lucky since my buddies don't have any stories like that either.
TGZ: I think CEP was being sarcastic when he referred to them as gentlemen
It evolved from vocal panhandling to physical intimidation, then to strong arm robbery. All the while the local lefties were saying "But it's not their fault that they are homeless, and you can't fault them for needing money." Then a few of the whacky liberals got beat pretty badly and robbed, and they finally decided they should curtail the more violent behavior of the homeless.
Personally, I'll never turn my back to weirdos approaching me on the street just because you never know when one of them might get violent. If they hit me up for cash, I'll just politely tell them "Sorry but no." If they keep pushing it I'll look them in the eye and tell them "I said NO." I've never had any of them push it farther than that, although they oftentimes start cursing.
i really love the city tho, but i usually just act crazy back or start making monkey nosies, one time a homeless looking dude actually game me some change!!!
true story..
Personally the big city life isn't for me, the novelty wore off after a few months living here, give me the more laid back suburbs any day.
There are a few generally nice places in the city, but it's so small (seven miles by seven) that you see a fair amount of bleed between areas. The Lower Haight, Noe Valley and the Castro are hip and cool and largely bum-free. Pacific Heights, the Marina and Cow Hollow are clean but expensive. I'm not sure about the Mission, I want to say it's safe but I haven't spent a lot of time there ...
My girlfriend and I are thinking of getting a place in the sleepy ol' Sunset, which will never be mistaken for the cool part of town but offers more value for your dollar with less crazy shit going on.
You have President Regan to thank for the abundance of wackos in SF..when he was the mayor...
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Are you like remembering an episode of Sliders or something? Ronald Reagan was never mayor of San Francisco. Or are you meaning when he was governor of California?
I'm 1337 bitches!
@Thegodzero: Sliders was indeed an awesome show! :] That was also your 1337th post btw, hehe.
I can't say I've ever had anyone be violent with me, though I've had the whole cursing attack because I wouldn't give some dude money to buy alcohol.
-caseyjones
Are you like remembering an episode of Sliders or something? Ronald Reagan was never mayor of San Francisco. Or are you meaning when he was governor of California?
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thats what i ment.. when i went looking for the incident for the post the article had something about the mayor of SF.. but yeah i knew it was his fault all the crazies are running wild there, i had a friend of mine tell me the story a while back.
shape: Avoid SoMA (where I live) and the Tenderloin.
There are a few generally nice places in the city, but it's so small (seven miles by seven) that you see a fair amount of bleed between areas. The Lower Haight, Noe Valley and the Castro are hip and cool and largely bum-free. Pacific Heights, the Marina and Cow Hollow are clean but expensive. I'm not sure about the Mission, I want to say it's safe but I haven't spent a lot of time there ...
My girlfriend and I are thinking of getting a place in the sleepy ol' Sunset, which will never be mistaken for the cool part of town but offers more value for your dollar with less crazy shit going on.
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The Mission has its decent and really sketchy parts. Same with SoMa really. Further down toward the embarcadaro its pretty decent. I'm on Potrero hill and I totally dig it. Awesome weather, views and parking (generally a nightmare in this town) and very easy access to the 101 and no bums. The only downer is it can feel a little detached from the city proper. If I didn't work down south I'd probably live deeper in.
Took this recently from my front door:
what happens though, the dude offers me a place to crash and a hot meal. no kidding, i looked worse off than him apparently.
so just dress like you didnt let your mom pick you clothes and they are great people.
>__>
i gotta ask, did he blind side you and just jab ya in the jaw and walk off, or did he look ya in the eyes first? sucks that happened to ya
Maybe its a global game of 'punch a random person,' and now it is your duty to punch another random person in the head, and walk off mumbling. You dont want to be responsible for the chain of events you could set in motion!
Naw, it was a total blindsiding. That was part of the Weird, we didn't have any eye contact before or after. I don't think it really registered to him what he was doing ... the stew of sensation he was swimming through must've gone something like VAGUE vague vague VAGUE grey VAGUE VAGUE punch that guy in the head GREY VAGUE vague vague ...
Crazy bastards, they add so much to the local color.