Universal Laws According to 3DS Max

Malekyth · May 2006

#641: The operation you wish to Undo to, will always be between one and five steps past the very end of the Undo buffer.

Xenobond · May 2006

#304: Autobak can be a blessing. But the blessing can sometimes turn itself off.

almighty_gir · May 2006

#777: When using 3DS Max R7, moving THAT vertex... yes, THAT ONE RIGHT THERE, will result in an unrecoverable error.

rooster · May 2006

#001 The very first object ye shal create ought be a vessel for preparing tea. Asketh not why.

#523 Your creation of torus knots shal increase tenfold whence the discovery of falloff map is made

MoP · May 2006

[ QUOTE ]
#523 Your creation of torus knots shal increase tenfold whence the discovery of falloff map is made

[/ QUOTE ]

Quoted for truth.

#32 - You shall mash your fingers down on the keyboard to find out what the hell that button was you just pressed that made everything stop working the way it was 5 seconds ago.

monster · May 2006

#75 - Intuitive modeling features will be added only AFTER every other 3D package, including the free ones, has them.

danr · May 2006

#04 : though shalt find that features that worked perfectly okay on the previous version have been verily fucked with and, lo, are henceforth broketh

Xenobond · May 2006

#05: Don't worry if your gizmo disappears on you because you accidentally pressed a key that you don't remember. It is 'X'. Remember the 'X'.

Slum · May 2006

#02: You find yourself wailing "OH MY GOD, ALL MY UV's ARE GONE!!" Do not fret. You just accidently applied the 'Unwrap UVW' modifier when you had "polygon mode" selected.

ScoobyDoofus · May 2006

#070 Despite having a correctly generated UV coodinates, clean mesh topology, and a perfectly scaled & aligned high-polygon model, Normal Map baking & viewing will never function correctly. In any version of the package. Except when you try to show somebody the problem your having, then it will work until they leave.

Psyk0 · May 2006

#666 3D Max's mysterious reset xform modifier will suddenly prove to be useful...but only after you've spent a few hours rigging the character and compiled it. Leaving you guessing "what teh fack happened?!" over the next few days.

Fixing the mesh in its weighted state will prove to be useless and you'll have to completely re-weight everything.

#13 Upgrade to Max 8 and experience jittery camera movement every time you rotate around your model, i must be the only one with that problem.

McIlroy · May 2006

# 483 : Do not attempt any kind of boolean unless you like your mesh to be f.u.b.a.r

skankerzero · May 2006

#951654323dfdsa - Remember, here at Autodesk, our aim is not to fix the problem, but provide an easy, 4 step workaround.

hawken · May 2006

[ QUOTE ]
#05: Don't worry if your gizmo disappears on you because you accidentally pressed a key that you don't remember. It is 'X'. Remember the 'X'.

[/ QUOTE ]

#00: programmers first, artists second

TomDunne · May 2006

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
#523 Your creation of torus knots shal increase tenfold whence the discovery of falloff map is made

[/ QUOTE ]

Quoted for truth.

[/ QUOTE ]

Ummmm.... this must be something I don't know. What do falloff maps have to do with torus geometry?

#24 - It is inconceivable that anyone would ever want to view more than 24 shaders in the material editor.

#302 - You didn't save a version before you collapsed your stack? You dumb bastard...

#1918 - The animated shaders you see in the viewport window will look absolutely, positively nothing like animated shaders you get at render.

ElysiumGX · May 2006

#789: Gmax? Hobbyist? Learning? Non-Linear? Fixes? Payment? Future? what?

Luxury · May 2006

[ QUOTE ]
#1918 - The animated shaders you see in the viewport window will look absolutely, positively nothing like animated shaders you get at render.

[/ QUOTE ]
Ha!

#042: You see that big key at the bottom of your keyboard? The very long one that just begs and demands to be pushed? Don't push that. It won't do what you think it will do.

rawkstar · May 2006

unlike other people in the office i haven't had any problems with max pretty much ever, but for some reason, it crashes when i undo...

Snowfly · May 2006

#126: No plug-in is an island.

Psyk0 · May 2006

#951 (max 5.1 + chuggnuts tools) do not accidentaly hit spacebar while in unwrap window = guaranteed crash everytime, at least for me.

Smirnoffka · May 2006

#17875 You can learn everything about the program in a year. And after 50 it can still surprise you.

KDR_11k · May 2006

[ QUOTE ]
#666 3D Max's mysterious reset xform modifier will suddenly prove to be useful...but only after you've spent a few hours rigging the character and compiled it. Leaving you guessing "what teh fack happened?!" over the next few days.

[/ QUOTE ]

What's so mysterious about that? It removes all translation, rotation and scaling from the object and applies it to the mesh directly. As long as you aren't doing anyhing to the object and only change the mesh you won't need to use it.

SuperOstrich · May 2006

Some of these are totally legit, but most of them leave me scratching my head. What the hell are you people doing with Max??

adam · May 2006

#1: Yes you've warezed your copy. And yes we know about it Mr. asasdf at Company Dwsdqwdq.

wille · May 2006

Mr Adam Brome.

We here at Dwsdqwdq Studios in Botswana, Africa, are strongly offended by your suggestions that our copies of the "Paradox 3dsmax 8" software are of the pirated nature and would like to ask you if you are willing to give us your account number so we can transfer 600million us dollars to our exiled king Asasdf. For your trouble we will give you 2percent of the total sum as a reward for your troubles.Thank you.

Best regards/
Asdasda Fdsfs
president of Dwsdqwdq Studios

Toomas · May 2006

#435634 zooming in gets slower and slower as you work to the point where you can only zoom untill your model fills the viewport.

#3214763294 the camera finds a new focal point, that is nowhere near your model, for no apparent reason.

hawken · May 2006

[ QUOTE ]

#3214763294 the camera finds a new focal point, that is nowhere near your model, for no apparent reason.

[/ QUOTE ]

Rick Stirling · May 2006

[ QUOTE ]
#00: programmers first, artists second

[/ QUOTE ].

Applies to all first generation game pipeline tools.

Mister Sentient · May 2006

#101 And the programmers shall be punished with a badly-documented SDK.

rooster · May 2006

[ QUOTE ]

Ummmm.... this must be something I don't know. What do falloff maps have to do with torus geometry?

[/ QUOTE ]

you mean when you first played with falloff maps you didn't go for the most curvy-tubey shape you could find?

thnom · May 2006

#956 Operations can become totally useless at ANY point. Selecting a vertex is fine but at a random time it shall become pretty pointless because when you move said vertex, it will deselect everything. Requires restart.

Mister Sentient · May 2006

#1913 Ye Mentalis Rayus integration shall be an unholy abomination. For sanctity of mind shalt though seek out pastures greener*.

* See XSI

motives · May 2006

[ QUOTE ]
Mr Adam Brome.

We here at Dwsdqwdq Studios in Botswana, Africa, are strongly offended by your suggestions that our copies of the "Paradox 3dsmax 8" software are of the pirated nature and would like to ask you if you are willing to give us your account number so we can transfer 600million us dollars to our exiled king Asasdf. For your trouble we will give you 2percent of the total sum as a reward for your troubles.Thank you.

Best regards/
Asdasda Fdsfs
president of Dwsdqwdq Studios

[/ QUOTE ]

hahaha funny stuff

Paul Jaquays · May 2006

#568 The file you need to work on was created by an artist on your team who created material files to look along a path that included his machine (specifically) -- requiring Max to do a 30 second time-out for each missing texture in the editor or on assets in the file.

Needles · May 2006

#897 Even with all the advances in video hardware, thow shall never know how ye mixmaps look till after thi 10 min render

gavku · May 2006

#525 When using the bridge function in max 7 (because gamebryo doesn't seem to support max 8) and listening to music through winamp = crash...(found this out today).

Mister Sentient · May 2006

[ QUOTE ]
#525 When using the bridge function in max 7 (because gamebryo doesn't seem to support max 8) and listening to music through winamp = crash...(found this out today).

[/ QUOTE ]

Max finally has a bridge function ?!

Lore · May 2006

#200 Reference and Tutorial files shall be out of date. Especial when it comes to rigging and is referring to the location of such said function doesnt exist in later version of max after the tutorial was written for. Leaving you confused on why the rig isn't working like the complete rigged file that Discreet provides as reference.

Joshua Stubbles · May 2006

[ QUOTE ]
Some of these are totally legit, but most of them leave me scratching my head. What the hell are you people doing with Max??

[/ QUOTE ]

Because we haven't switched to Modo YET.

MoP · May 2006

[ QUOTE ]
#568 The file you need to work on was created by an artist on your team who created material files to look along a path that included his machine (specifically) -- requiring Max to do a 30 second time-out for each missing texture in the editor or on assets in the file.

[/ QUOTE ]

Argh, so true, Paul! Ridiculous!

Scott Ruggels · May 2006

#8 Biped is a tool that makes Poor Animators into average ones. It also make Great animators into average ones.

9# Biped is supremelyself centered. All coordinates are local to it.

Scott

Cthogua · May 2006

#33.333 If thou locketh thine computer with Max open, ye verilly thou shalt return to discover either vertices of enormous size, or random bits of geometry hath become visible only in wireframe mode.

SuperOstrich · May 2006

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Some of these are totally legit, but most of them leave me scratching my head. What the hell are you people doing with Max??

[/ QUOTE ]

Because we haven't switched to Modo YET.

[/ QUOTE ]

LOL. Not quite what I meant. I meant, "What the hell are you people doing WRONG with Max to get some of these errors?"

AstroZombie · May 2006

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#8 Biped is a tool that makes Poor Animators into average ones. It also make Great animators into average ones.

[/ QUOTE ]

Joshua Stubbles · May 2006

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LOL. Not quite what I meant. I meant, "What the hell are you people doing WRONG with Max to get some of these errors?"

[/ QUOTE ]

Ahh, okay. I don't know either - I never have this many issues with Max. Hell, I've never even heard of most of these

Chunkey · May 2006

thou shalt get booted out to desktop when moving verts around in max 8 for no apparent reason..

thou shall get booted out when autosave kicks in

thou shalt fuck up royally when mirroring an object or do a connect edge in editable poly.... unless you export the model out to .3ds and importing it back in and redo the material for it for it to stop happening

Rick Stirling · May 2006

[ QUOTE ]
#568 The file you need to work on was created by an artist on your team who created material files to look along a path that included his machine (specifically) -- requiring Max to do a 30 second time-out for each missing texture in the editor or on assets in the file.

[/ QUOTE ]

Every 5 seconds, after you hit OK in the Bitmap Manager Error window.

#3 The Maxscript listner has selective hearing

Rick Stirling · May 2006

Truely though, Max8 has some great features, I just wish they had been in a Max7 service pack. 8 is on SP3=release 4 in what, 9 months? I still crash it 3 times a day.

Universal Laws According to 3DS Max

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