I think the phone is entirely too glossy. At 0:36 I had no idea what was going on. I assume it's supposed to be extending, but it just ended up looking like something that belongs to the T-1000 liquid metal terminator. The final shot of the phone in its arched position is so brief I had to pause the video to really get a good view of it.
The effect you have when you materialise the phone it'self is quite nice but something about it just isn't sitting right for me. The timing is all a bit too even on it. Have the animation slow down towards the end, this will give it nicer flow, You might also have the phone itself rotate in the direction of the particles as it materialises and have a little bit of a spring to it as it comes to a stop.
I'd also ease the arcs of the rotation on the phone out when you're showing it off after the particle swarm. It changes too abruptly at the moment. The final part where it goes to right it'self is too sudden too, it looks like the phone suddenly realised where it was supposed to be and snapped to.
Also consider adding some subtle rotation to the phone as the camera pans by on the close ups to add a little interest to things.
Finally when the ear buds extend you can see that the geometry was overlapping as the grid on the ear bud suddenly appears half way through the animation.
All in all it's a fun little idea and well executed, just add some polish and you'll be away.
This is a cool idea, and I did a similar project not too long ago. My initial reaction, though, is that this doesn't really look like an apple ad. Maybe that isn't entirely what your'e going for, but if it is, I would watch a bunch of ads and get a better sense of how they market. The effect when the phone materializes feels very out of place. You would never see an effect like that in an apple ad. Also I would simplify the animations, especially the first one at 0:18. It moves around at too many different angles. I might also reduce the amount of text, and maybe add a subtle gradient background.
Overall it feels sloppy in execution. I would point out specific things, but everyone so far has hit all my points. I'd make a checklist of what everyone has given you and work on it.
Replies
The effect you have when you materialise the phone it'self is quite nice but something about it just isn't sitting right for me. The timing is all a bit too even on it. Have the animation slow down towards the end, this will give it nicer flow, You might also have the phone itself rotate in the direction of the particles as it materialises and have a little bit of a spring to it as it comes to a stop.
I'd also ease the arcs of the rotation on the phone out when you're showing it off after the particle swarm. It changes too abruptly at the moment. The final part where it goes to right it'self is too sudden too, it looks like the phone suddenly realised where it was supposed to be and snapped to.
Also consider adding some subtle rotation to the phone as the camera pans by on the close ups to add a little interest to things.
Finally when the ear buds extend you can see that the geometry was overlapping as the grid on the ear bud suddenly appears half way through the animation.
All in all it's a fun little idea and well executed, just add some polish and you'll be away.