Hit us with gaming jokes!

keyframe
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Larry keyframe
Hey all, with the new year and this holy jolly mood, lets have a good laugh with some gaming jokes! 

I'm gonna start with one.

What is super Mario's favorite movie?
Mama mia!!

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  • sacboi
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    sacboi polycounter lvl 2
    Why are cats so good at video games?
    Because they have nine lives!
  • AGoodFella
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    AGoodFella keyframe
    sacboi said:
    Why are cats so good at video games?
    Because they have nine lives!
    no, stop
  • Francois_K
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    Francois_K polycounter lvl 4
    why did the chicken cross the road?
    to post more art on 3d art showcase and critique
  • Axi5
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    Axi5 polycounter lvl 4
    R3D said:
    If I wanted a joke, I'd look at your portfolio.

  • Brian "Panda" Choi
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    Brian "Panda" Choi sublime tool
    This all feels like a weird mish mash of anti-jokes, people trying to connect with others, and cynicism.
  • Eric Chadwick
    It's all good until someone dies in a fire.
  • Joopson
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    Joopson Polycount Sponsor
    How do Saints get across a lake?
    ...
    ...
    Saints row.....
  • Larry
  • Larry
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    Larry keyframe
    R3D said:
    If I wanted a joke, I'd look at your portfolio.
    That was unnecessarily mean
  • Axi5
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    Axi5 polycounter lvl 4
    This all feels like a weird mish mash of anti-jokes, people trying to connect with others, and cynicism.
    Isn't that what this forum is all about?
  • Larry
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    Larry keyframe
    Axi5 said:
    This all feels like a weird mish mash of anti-jokes, people trying to connect with others, and cynicism.
    Isn't that what this forum is all about?
    I most certainly feel the connection in this post
  • Eric Chadwick
  • another caveman
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    another caveman polycounter lvl 4
    what do you mean you work under substance all day

    ...idk I guess the joke makes more sense in french

  • fdfxd2
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    fdfxd2 polycounter lvl 2
    R3D said:
    If I wanted a joke, I'd look at your portfolio.
    r/MurderedByWords
  • katastrophic88
    Joopson said:
    How do Saints get across a lake?
    ...
    ...
    Saints row.....
    Okay, this made me giggle...but it might be because I have a weakness for puns/dad jokes/jokes that make a normal person cringe lol
  • sacboi
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    sacboi polycounter lvl 2

  • Clark Coots
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    Clark Coots polycounter lvl 6
    What happens when a biologist gets electrocuted?...... Bioshock
    Why did a man grapple to and hijack a helicopter?...... Just Cause
    What's it called when you get a call from your behind?....... Call of Duty
    What did Master Chief get when he died?..... Halo
    What's it called when your last dream comes true?....... Final Fantasy
    What do you call a nomad with all his belongings on his back?..... Pac Man

    k i'm done. thx.
  • Larry
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    Larry keyframe
    What happens when a biologist gets electrocuted?...... Bioshock
    Why did a man grapple to and hijack a helicopter?...... Just Cause
    What's it called when you get a call from your behind?....... Call of Duty
    What did Master Chief get when he died?..... Halo
    What's it called when your last dream comes true?....... Final Fantasy
    What do you call a nomad with all his belongings on his back?..... Pac Man

    k i'm done. thx.
    lol these were all nice xD
  • pmiller001
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    pmiller001 polycounter lvl 3
    Why did the environment artist keep breaking up with their significant others?
    Because they wanted a modular relationship. 

    ;)
  • katastrophic88
    What happens when a biologist gets electrocuted?...... Bioshock
    Why did a man grapple to and hijack a helicopter?...... Just Cause
    What's it called when you get a call from your behind?....... Call of Duty
    What did Master Chief get when he died?..... Halo
    What's it called when your last dream comes true?....... Final Fantasy
    What do you call a nomad with all his belongings on his back?..... Pac Man

    k i'm done. thx.
    Well done!!
  • garcellano
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    garcellano polycounter lvl 3
    -Sorry, I can't walk over there, there's a hidden collision mesh blocking my way. I just.. I can't, this collision mesh, gosh.
    -Hey bro, it's been a while, I can see you've stretched your UVs.
    -A bunch of Captain Crunch cereal boxes show up in the break room. A note by the counter says
    "It's that time again, folks, mount up!"
    -This bug still exists, bye.
    -Fix your walk cycle.
    -"Nice portfolio...."   *closes window tab or returns tablet*    "of ****" 
    (lol sorry that could be a mean one).

    -QA on-site interview.
    Two guys in a small office room, sitting at a table across from each other. Interviewer crosses his arms.
    Interviewer: So, how good are you with attention to detail?
    Candidate: *Looks straight at his eyes* You're wearing gym socks, I can tell you just got out of the gym this morning and forgot to bring your other pair of socks. You're well built, but you smell like smoke. Probably was a bit over-weight a while back, and trying to change your health habits, but you're stressed out. Brazilian Ju-Jitsu? You go to that one across the block? You know the instructor? Yeah, I'm related to him. And, that burger joint you use to go to all the time, I'm related to the owner, too. He says he hasn't seen you in years when you asked for a veggie burger out of nowhere. Not your typical order."
    Interview: *Sweating and gulps*

    -Team history test at work. A bunch of retro consoles are placed on a table, with all the labels covered in tape. New set of employees line up.
    To start off, the Boss gives a new young employee a Sega Genesis cartridge of a game that he worked on early in his career. The Boss says "You have 3 seconds."
    The young employees runs and puts it on the wrong console, in the SNES. He says "It kind of fits?.."
    The Boss is in tears, turns around to the 2nd in Command as she comforts him. All the Senior devs shake their heads. They all look at the next young and new employee. He/she's looking on their phone, looking up the Boss's wiki page and says "Alright, I got this. I won't fail you, Boss." Takes the phone down.
    The 2nd in Command then takes the next round and gives him/her an Atari Jaguar cartridge that she worked on early in her career.
    The second employee says "Oh.. no... wait.. no.."
    Boss gets a bit nervous, breathing heavily.
    Before she lets go of the cartridge to the employee, she says in disappointment "..5 seconds..."
    The second employee just holds the cartridge, staring at the 2nd in Command and then to the table, frozen.
    Her and the Boss all huddle together with the Senior devs in silence.
    The employee kneels on the floor in despair next to the first one who tried. Both on the floor.
    One Senior dev slowly walks to take the cartridge from the employee.
    The rest of the new employees shaken up, nervous, not sure if they should take out their phones, too.
    The Senior dev goes them, with an upset look on his face, and quietly tells them "..show's over.. get back to work.." 
  • Niknesh
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    Niknesh polycounter lvl 4
    I think most know this quote, but still:

    "Why do chemists call helium, curium, and barium 'the medical elements'? Because, if you can't 'helium' or 'curium', you 'barium'!"

    What did Dante find out when he cut an onion? Devils May Cry.

  • R3D
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    R3D polycounter lvl 7
    Larry said:
    R3D said:
    If I wanted a joke, I'd look at your portfolio.
    That was unnecessarily mean
    A joke. I assure you.
  • Equanim
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    Equanim polycounter lvl 6
    A developer's wife tells him, "Go to the store and buy a gallon of milk and if there's eggs, buy a dozen."

    He comes back with 12 gallons of milk.

    ------

    1. Heat small pot of water to a boil
    2. Add developer's keyboard
    3. Let boil for 15 minutes, stir occasionally
    Cheeto soup.
  • Larry
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    Larry keyframe
    Niknesh said:

    What did Dante find out when he cut an onion? Devils May Cry.

    I liked that one lol xD
  • JoshuaG
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    JoshuaG polycounter lvl 3
    If you're having trouble with modeling, you just need to start beveling in yourself and you'll get the job done.
  • KindachiShota

    My girlfriend told me to stop playing Pokemon as it was childish. I started thrashing about and roared “You don’t have enough badges to control me!”   >:) >:) >:)

  • JacqueChoi
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    JacqueChoi greentooth
    If Tetris has taught me anything, it is that my failures pile up, and my success disappears.
  • CrackRockSteady
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    CrackRockSteady Polycount Sponsor
    -Sorry, I can't walk over there, there's a hidden collision mesh blocking my way. I just.. I can't, this collision mesh, gosh.
    -Hey bro, it's been a while, I can see you've stretched your UVs.
    -A bunch of Captain Crunch cereal boxes show up in the break room. A note by the counter says
    "It's that time again, folks, mount up!"
    -This bug still exists, bye.
    -Fix your walk cycle.
    -"Nice portfolio...."   *closes window tab or returns tablet*    "of ****" 
    (lol sorry that could be a mean one).

    -QA on-site interview.
    Two guys in a small office room, sitting at a table across from each other. Interviewer crosses his arms.
    Interviewer: So, how good are you with attention to detail?
    Candidate: *Looks straight at his eyes* You're wearing gym socks, I can tell you just got out of the gym this morning and forgot to bring your other pair of socks. You're well built, but you smell like smoke. Probably was a bit over-weight a while back, and trying to change your health habits, but you're stressed out. Brazilian Ju-Jitsu? You go to that one across the block? You know the instructor? Yeah, I'm related to him. And, that burger joint you use to go to all the time, I'm related to the owner, too. He says he hasn't seen you in years when you asked for a veggie burger out of nowhere. Not your typical order."
    Interview: *Sweating and gulps*

    -Team history test at work. A bunch of retro consoles are placed on a table, with all the labels covered in tape. New set of employees line up.
    To start off, the Boss gives a new young employee a Sega Genesis cartridge of a game that he worked on early in his career. The Boss says "You have 3 seconds."
    The young employees runs and puts it on the wrong console, in the SNES. He says "It kind of fits?.."
    The Boss is in tears, turns around to the 2nd in Command as she comforts him. All the Senior devs shake their heads. They all look at the next young and new employee. He/she's looking on their phone, looking up the Boss's wiki page and says "Alright, I got this. I won't fail you, Boss." Takes the phone down.
    The 2nd in Command then takes the next round and gives him/her an Atari Jaguar cartridge that she worked on early in her career.
    The second employee says "Oh.. no... wait.. no.."
    Boss gets a bit nervous, breathing heavily.
    Before she lets go of the cartridge to the employee, she says in disappointment "..5 seconds..."
    The second employee just holds the cartridge, staring at the 2nd in Command and then to the table, frozen.
    Her and the Boss all huddle together with the Senior devs in silence.
    The employee kneels on the floor in despair next to the first one who tried. Both on the floor.
    One Senior dev slowly walks to take the cartridge from the employee.
    The rest of the new employees shaken up, nervous, not sure if they should take out their phones, too.
    The Senior dev goes them, with an upset look on his face, and quietly tells them "..show's over.. get back to work.." 
    - A gamer raccoon wearing a pair of overalls and a cowboy hat boards a bus in Mexico.  After 2 days of travelling the bus reaches Denver and the raccoon disembarks.  He makes his way to the nearest diner where he sits down at the counter.  
    Waitress:  "What'll it be hon?"
    Raccoon:  "I'll have a cup of coffee"
    The waitress brings his coffee and asks if he would like a menu.
    Raccoon: "No thanks, I'm just having coffee"
    After some time he finishes his coffee and pays.  ..."I guess I'll be leaving now..."
  • Joopson
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    Joopson Polycount Sponsor
    CrackRockSteady said:

    - A gamer raccoon wearing a pair of overalls and a cowboy hat boards a bus in Mexico.  After 2 days of travelling the bus reaches Denver and the raccoon disembarks.  He makes his way to the nearest diner where he sits down at the counter.  
    Waitress:  "What'll it be hon?"
    Raccoon:  "I'll have a cup of coffee"
    The waitress brings his coffee and asks if he would like a menu.
    Raccoon: "No thanks, I'm just having coffee"
    After some time he finishes his coffee and pays.  ..."I guess I'll be leaving now..."
    I don't get it
  • CrackRockSteady
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    CrackRockSteady Polycount Sponsor
    Joopson said:
    CrackRockSteady said:

    - A gamer raccoon wearing a pair of overalls and a cowboy hat boards a bus in Mexico.  After 2 days of travelling the bus reaches Denver and the raccoon disembarks.  He makes his way to the nearest diner where he sits down at the counter.  
    Waitress:  "What'll it be hon?"
    Raccoon:  "I'll have a cup of coffee"
    The waitress brings his coffee and asks if he would like a menu.
    Raccoon: "No thanks, I'm just having coffee"
    After some time he finishes his coffee and pays.  ..."I guess I'll be leaving now..."
    I don't get it
    yeah, that was the point.  After that other post I thought maybe we were doing jokes with no punchline ;)
  • Brian "Panda" Choi
    dangnabit, Crack . . .
  • dGreenberg
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    dGreenberg polycounter lvl 2
    What are Mario's favorite type of pants?
    Denim Denim Denim.

    What do you call a Nintendo Wii in France?
    A Nintendo Yes.

    Why does Pac Man prefer Final Fantasy X over the others?
    Wakka Wakka Wakka.

    ...Yep.
  • garcellano
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    garcellano polycounter lvl 3
    Joopson said:
    CrackRockSteady said:

    - A gamer raccoon wearing a pair of overalls and a cowboy hat boards a bus in Mexico.  After 2 days of travelling the bus reaches Denver and the raccoon disembarks.  He makes his way to the nearest diner where he sits down at the counter.  
    Waitress:  "What'll it be hon?"
    Raccoon:  "I'll have a cup of coffee"
    The waitress brings his coffee and asks if he would like a menu.
    Raccoon: "No thanks, I'm just having coffee"
    After some time he finishes his coffee and pays.  ..."I guess I'll be leaving now..."
    I don't get it
    yeah, that was the point.  After that other post I thought maybe we were doing jokes with no punchline ;)
    lol man, I thought mine had some. Ah well. 
  • CrackRockSteady
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    CrackRockSteady Polycount Sponsor
    Joopson said:
    CrackRockSteady said:

    - A gamer raccoon wearing a pair of overalls and a cowboy hat boards a bus in Mexico.  After 2 days of travelling the bus reaches Denver and the raccoon disembarks.  He makes his way to the nearest diner where he sits down at the counter.  
    Waitress:  "What'll it be hon?"
    Raccoon:  "I'll have a cup of coffee"
    The waitress brings his coffee and asks if he would like a menu.
    Raccoon: "No thanks, I'm just having coffee"
    After some time he finishes his coffee and pays.  ..."I guess I'll be leaving now..."
    I don't get it
    yeah, that was the point.  After that other post I thought maybe we were doing jokes with no punchline ;)
    lol man, I thought mine had some. Ah well. 
    haha I kid I kid :)
  • KindachiShota
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