Box Lift Animation --Critiques, please!
polycounter lvl 8
I am planning on putting an animation reel together asap, so I can apply to some nearby companies and FINALLY get the ever-illusive first industry job... So, as per usual Polycount style, please check out this animation I've been working on and rip it to shreds 
I chose to do a box lift, cause it seems like an important staple in a reel to show good weight. I'm hoping that's what I've got going on here. :P It's (maybe) almost complete, (yes, I realize I should have started getting critiques sooner, this is my bad), but I figure it's not too late for some brutal honesty. Like I said... I want good enough pieces to land me a job.
[ame]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JI6fBm_5wy4[/ame]
(Ok, but don't be TOO brutal--I have spent many many hours on this piece so far
lol)
I chose to do a box lift, cause it seems like an important staple in a reel to show good weight. I'm hoping that's what I've got going on here. :P It's (maybe) almost complete, (yes, I realize I should have started getting critiques sooner, this is my bad), but I figure it's not too late for some brutal honesty. Like I said... I want good enough pieces to land me a job.
[ame]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JI6fBm_5wy4[/ame](Ok, but don't be TOO brutal--I have spent many many hours on this piece so far
lol)
Replies
I dont really get why he stand up, braces himself then falls, it doesn't make a lot of sense in reference to him going into the lift, or in context of the story. I'm also unsure of what kind of character he is, you have him wobbling as he stands - is he supposed to be a young child?
The pulling the pot towards him is good, although I feel you could push the poses more, get his arms fully extended, add a bit more squash and stretch.
There's a very large pop in the right knee as he pulls the pot off and it almost hits the ground.
After he hits the ground and you have the pot almost falling over you dont counter the forward motion with his arms moving forward to balance the weight out. This applies to the entire time he is swinging the pot around, he doesn't counter the bottom of the pot enough to have it actually be balanced.
When he's in the resting pose at the bottom, you should go to an arched back before he lifts it up, try to actually feel the weight yourself, try to center his gravity a bit more, its too low, he wouldnt' be able to move his feet with his weight that low.
All in all its a good start, but you still have a lot of polish to do. Get in and adjust those curves, so they ease where they should, and push your poses, right now they're good, but they could be better. Keep up the good work! I love seeing animation pieces on here!
Edit* Hope that wasn't too long or mean, just pointing out the things that I see that could make this better.
The pacing is too long, it seems to take ages to stand up or look at things. Why does the character collapse when leaning on the block? This and the slow movement makes the character seem feeble and incapable of supporting their own weight. It also makes the vase look super heavy.
The hoisting motions themselves look convincing, but the context is confusing.
Keep at it, and if it helps at all, have one of your friends act out something similar to what your trying to animate so you can see what it would look like in the real world.
Notes:
0:10 - Hands shift oddly thought the floor, can probably cure this with planted keys. it looks like you might have over key'ed this part and you might want to simplify it a little.
0:17 - Why the drunk wobble?
0:24 - I have clue why the person falls down.
0:30 - I don't think people would pull a heavy object like that while on their knees. Normally they would plant their feet and tug at?
0:46 - the person is pretty too close to the box and in danger of falling backward. If you acted out how the person stands up and keeps so close to the box it might be hard to do. Someone would probably stand back a little bit and tug/slide it off and attempt to catch it?
While the person is crouched holding the pot, the spine should curve around it a little more, like they're hugging the pot close to them and they're conforming to its shape a bit more. It might be good to have them get a better grip at some point since at a few points it looks like their balance would be off and they would lose it.
At the end maybe have the person push it slightly onto the shelf.
Thought about animating a bend modifier on the shelf to bow it a bit.
The whole thing is kind of slow as if its building up to something that doesn't quite materialize.
You've got some great work in there and I can tell you put a lot of effort into it but there are somethings you should have worked out sooner =/
sorry for the harshness you didn't want. It's better than a lot of my earlier attempts were.
[ame]
As you can see, I tried to cut a lot of excess stuff out... which was painful enough, but I wonder if I still need to chop it up some more? I have been told already on this pass that the movement is there, but the timing is still too drawn out. More comments on this would be helpul. More overall critique would be helpful. This piece needs to be done, cause I got bigger, better stuff I want to move on to...!
Thanks for taking a look!
EDIT: I don't know what happened, but it posted the same video I already had at the beginning of this thread.
Honestly, I would have him look up at the vase, then get up immediately. Truthfully, you could even have him already started standing up. Cut out all the pausing and looking at his hands portion of it before he stands up because it doesn't serve any purpose.
Since your goal is 'box lift' and you are trying to convey a sense of weight with this piece, go straight to your example that showcases your knowledge on the subject. I like it once it gets going, the motions are good so go straight into what you want to showcase.
Just my 2 cents.
It's already a great piece, just needs a few final tweaks to make it awesome sauce.
I think you need to cut out the beginning, you need to save the acting for a different piece in your reel.
also, Ive never seen a person carry a heavy object using the crab walk, it doesnt really make sense, but if you are going to go with that, you need to make the feet shuffle more.
with your center of balance so low, and your feet so far apart, you would need to either throw your weight from side to side, or to have quick shuffling steps.
I really dont like the whole falling bit, or the whole on the knees thing
at 1:08, you have him bobbling the vase, but you put too much in, if its as heavy as you make it look, then this is kind of impossible, just lighten it up, and keep his hands planted on the vase, even mid-bobble.
At frame 1:15-1:17, he looks up at the ledge then pauses. Possibly contemplating how he's going to get it up there, or maybe he's passing gas. You have no idea because he's just paused in that position.
You could make it a bit more interesting I think. Maybe you could have him starting to stand up, but slowly like he is really straining and have his legs shaking a little under the weight of the vase. That could help convey the sense that he is using all of his strength to lift this thing and his legs are about to give out.
I dunno, just a thought. Keep at it and make it sexy.
I watched it again, this time imagining the dude was really drunk, and waking up at someone's house and doesn't remember anything and he has to throw up REALLY fast, sees the vase and decides to spew into that. Suddenly the whole thing made sense, until he put it down at the end. But i don't think that was the "story" you were going for. Before you animate, think of what this guy wants to do and why, and imagine in your head how a person would act (not a poly model) to do that, then emulate that. I think it would be very hard to imagine any real person doing any of this stuff.
Lots of work went into this, you've learned a lot from this project i'm sure, but remember, quality over quantity, this is especially true for animation, your animation of the man actually carrying the vase was very good, i know that stuff's not easy. But this kind of animation just comes with getting into 3d animation, just something you gotta get out of your system, so don't worry about doing some drawn out random stuff just so you can get a feel for the program and how things work. But in the future tighten things up and think 'em through!
Sorry about that. :P Keep the great critiques coming! I really appreciate them all
The falling down part is still really weird. If he's purposely lowering himself to ground level, why drop like dead weight?
still with the whole falling down thing but good work!
I can't get Youtube @ work, I'll have a look later, can only repeat what others have posted based on the original one , in that a, he looks drunk - if it IS supposed to be drunk (alchoholic removal man) then maybe incorporate a bottle somewhere, b, the use of the basic biped is fine, but there are many free models out there to use for animation, check out the 11 second club's download section - there are some models in there that'd be perfect for you, and allow you to incorporate some expression into the peice, finally , c, I'm hoping you replaced the crab walk - it doesn't make any sense for him to start with the vase half-way to hip height only to drop it to the floor, as others have suggested, try performing the move yourself in real life and see just how impractical and difficult it is.
It's easier to hack out a few 2D scribbles than it is to cut out hours of work. They don't need to be anything pretty and no one needs to see them. You could do stick figures and quick poses just to get the key poses blocked out in a way that doesn't take hours to try several things. Then move onto blocking in key poses using stepped keys. Then you're ready to jump in and do what you originally did and plow through everything.
Don't get too down on yourself for having to hack some stuff out, it happens even with a lot of planning stuff still ends up on the cutting room floor. You're learning and that's always a good thing so even the parts no one will never see again, those were good practice.
I think you're too involved in this particular piece and should try something new like a walk or run cycle. But don't jump into it and try and figure it out as you go. Plan it out, act it out not just in your head but physically do it, time yourself and tape yourself if you can. shoot for something that's 10-15 seconds long.
Then maybe come back to the lift later if you feel like it but I think you need some time to detach.
Check out this box lift.
http://vimeo.com/6932222
It's not perfect but its pretty good. 12 seconds, this is almost too long for a reel. I think they have the right amount of animation leading up to the lift, some great poses, the timing is off in quite a few places but overall its a pretty good example of a box lift.
Vig - I was pretty well aware I wasn't going at this the best, or even correct way. I think it was one of those things where you can hear and understand the advice, but until you've made the mistake yourself, it just doesn't sink in. Now that I've gotten that bit of sillyness out of the way, I'm going to try to go at all my future projects in a more professional, well thought-out way.
I had actually done thumbnails, and I had acted this one out, believe it or not. I think it just ended up going on and on to the point where my good intentions were overwhelmed by everything I was forcing into this piece. And yes, I did straight-ahead animation on this piece, which I also knew wasn't smart, but yeah, gotta make my mistakes to learn, right? :P
I agree, I should probably get away from this piece... take what I learned and move on, right?
I just quickly started something last night, which I'm being careful about doing more properly this time. I will start a thread for it soon.
Thanks again everyone... I feel like I've learned a lot from this piece, and I don't just mean from working in 3DMax and animating. Expect more animations from me soon. :P
0.00 | 0.30 | 0.42 | 0.46
most of the stuff between them is making the timing bad; and should be thrown out.