Home 3D Art Showcase & Critiques

[UDK] Hei Zhen Zhu - Combat Information Center - (Noob Challenge 6)

ng.aniki
polycounter lvl 13
Offline / Send Message
ng.aniki polycounter lvl 13
Hello everyone !

I started the monthly noob challenge 06 and could not finish in time. But I decided I would finish the scene at my own pace, and so I kept working on it here and there.

I made a video to showcase it, and some screenshots here. It is not final, I already spotted some mistakes and plan to make another render and showcase video. So all crits and comments are very welcome !


Video (Please, don't hurt my feeling and watch in 1080p !):

HeiZhenZhu_CIC_ByJulienHeijmans_youtube.jpg



Screenshots (To watch in HD: Right Click - Open Image in a new tab):

HeiZhenZhu_CIC_ByJulienHeijmans_00.jpg

HeiZhenZhu_CIC_ByJulienHeijmans_05.jpg

HeiZhenZhu_CIC_ByJulienHeijmans_01.jpg

HeiZhenZhu_CIC_ByJulienHeijmans_02.jpg

HeiZhenZhu_CIC_ByJulienHeijmans_03.jpg

HeiZhenZhu_CIC_ByJulienHeijmans_04.jpg

Everything has been rendered/post-processed/cut in udk, including the intro sequence.

Reference: http://gryphart.com/files-gryphartcom/Gryphart_Images/Portfolio/Boat_CIC_Room_final_rsfrwb.jpg
By Eric 'Gryphart' Gagnon - http://gryphart.com/

Please share any ideas you have about the scene, the video, or anything else.
(I think the video is too long/slow, at least for recruiters, I should build a faster and shorter version)

Nb:
-I noticed the mistake in the "Breakdown" word at the end of the video, I will fix this in the next version I will make soon.
-The said breakdown will be coming in the next weeks. Rendering all the highpoly, video editing, and everything will take some time.
-My personal website, that url we can see in the video, is an old one, a new one is currently WIP.

Replies

  • St.Sabath
    Offline / Send Message
    St.Sabath polycounter lvl 11
    Nailed It! Beau-Ti-Full!

    Fix thos points you mentioned and itll be superb when thats done..GJ!
  • TheRealFroman
    Offline / Send Message
    TheRealFroman polycounter lvl 11
    Woooo! Great stuff
  • SaferDan
    Offline / Send Message
    SaferDan polycounter lvl 14
    Absolutely stunning!
  • mospheric
    Offline / Send Message
    mospheric polycounter lvl 11
    Wonderful presentation with the work so far! The video feels a tad bit long though (I understand if you are matching it to the music :P)

    Super excited to see that breakdown! :D
  • Madwish
    Offline / Send Message
    Madwish polycounter lvl 6
    Really nice stuff! It totally looks Deus Ex HR in red. Presentation is a great touch.

    I only have two comments on it :

    - You have a lot of very bright values at the same level with the same dominant red and the white bars. It looks cool and futuristic, but it's also a bit hard on the eye. The concept uses a lot of contrast, less screens, less pure white and add a nice light orange tint at the back so that the eye has some sort of main direction. There's no real direction or focus in your main image. Screens are pretty much the same value and color everywhere.

    You could, for example, reduce the brightness of all the side screens to put the emphasis on the main table and screens. You could also add some sort of fog at the back corridor to give a better sense of depth. Reducing the white lights may be nice too.

    - The screens are a bit "static", especially the main table. That's quite a main point of the scene and the concept seems to play with that. Could be cool to create some sort of great animation, it would render well in the video and increase the focus in the scene.

    But this is just nitpicking, it looks really good already. :thumbup:
  • -Em'-
    Offline / Send Message
    -Em'- polycounter lvl 8
    Nice final render Aniki ;)
    That map looks so real i cant to touch it
  • Alphavader
    Offline / Send Message
    Alphavader polycounter lvl 11
    aVOWzm2_460sa.gif

    Very great progress and nice video.
    The image - description and naming is very distracting - i would put them in a bit more decent order..

    Overall very nice - the red is a bit too intense - but maybe its just me.
    Great animations too
  • jStins
    Offline / Send Message
    jStins interpolator
    Good execution of the concept and good going finishing the scene. I have to agree with Madwish on the high value/saturation on the monitors hurting the overall presentation of the scene. It really does flatten things out and make it a bit hard on the eyes.

    I'm also noticing a little more balance between warm (screens) and cool (metal) in the concept. This could probably be adjusted by tweaking the metal shader/textures, but I also think some of this balance needs to come through in the lighting. Maybe consider something that could motivate a cool light coming from behind the camera.

    I'd also say that the text in your presentation is a bit distracting from the scene itself.

    Great work with all the hard surfaces, everything looks clean and executed well at a technical level. Just needs that last 10% of polish. :)
  • Shrike
    Offline / Send Message
    Shrike interpolator
    looks really nice, so strong colors, like that
    nice detail everywhere

    your presentation on the image is over the top tho, your logo is way too big and could have better proportions, also I would leave the deus ex logo thing out, youre inspired by thousands of things, but why write it on your image.
  • ng.aniki
    Offline / Send Message
    ng.aniki polycounter lvl 13
    Alright ! Thanks for the comments everyone !


    @Shrike:
    You are totally right, like the others... I thought the logo looked cool after making it, so I placed it everywhere... EVERYWHERE ! Hehe, too much, I will fix this and also remove the Deus Ex logo when I will make the screens of the updated version of the scene !

    @jStins:
    Thank you for the compliments ! It is really nice to hear after spending so much time on this scene.

    For the saturation, I will think about it, the think is: WHen you lower saturation of the red, it turns pink, and that is really ugly. Maybe lower the emissive multiplier !


    @Alphavader: Thank you :D I will take your comment into account !
    @-Em'-: Merciii !

    @Madwish: You are right. The thing is, the lighting of the concept art is not really correct, some stuff are really bright(white) with nearly no light up close, and some part are dark whith the light not too far away, that is something easy to do for composition in photoshop, but harder in 3d. I will play with the lights a bit, try what you suggested and see where it will leads me. Thank you for your really interesting comment !


    @St.Sabath ,TheRealFroman, SaferDan, mospheric: Thank you very much for your comments, that is really nice to read !
  • lukepham101
    Offline / Send Message
    lukepham101 polycounter lvl 7
    Hey man, looks fantastic! I'm really glad you finished this piece off, it turned out awesome! Much more content put into the scene than when I did it haha. Turned out super nicely and the video was really cool, a little too long though. :) There's a few minor things though I think is holding this back from being fantastic to fucking fantastic.

    With the renders to start with, I think it's a little too dark and it's only using predominantly one colour red for the most part and I don't think there's enough contrast in terms of colour. What I mean is I think you have a lot of the white contrasting with the red, but it doesn't really make it stand out, I think it'd look better with a yellow colour to make them pop out more. Also, if you use some post processing to add some ambient colour to the scene too it'd look awesome, like a little tinge of blue or yellow or green and see what looks good.

    Another thing too is that it's a bit too dark in terms of the lighting in some areas, there's some parts where it's complete black and I'm not digging it, I think if you raise the ambient a little bit it'd be good. I think the metallic objects in the scene would benefit from ramping up the glossiness and chucking an environment map too to help out with faking the reflections and really get that material definition down.

    I'll do a paintover to point out what I mean exactly, but sorry for the long list of complaints man lol! It looks fantastic already though, I think it just needs that little push to make it jizz worthy, KEEP GOING MAN!!!
  • lukepham101
    Offline / Send Message
    lukepham101 polycounter lvl 7
    Hey man, apologies in advance for my terrible handwriting and paint over skills, but if you get the idea of what I mean, that's what I'm trying to get at! All of the metal and such I think could benefit from a little bit of reflection, which would be controlled in the glossiness and environment map. Anyways, good job man! :)

    IFbNUFj.jpg
  • Dubzski
    Offline / Send Message
    Dubzski polycounter lvl 11
    Hey man really nice job on this looks excellent apart from one factor... red, red everywhere....!

    Get rid of the red on everything and change it to differant colours.... blue, yellow, green etc. You have 20 areas that are all the same lighting wise which is really ruining this piece.

    + Be careful with the glow on the screens it looks like you have just slapped an omni light over the top of some of them rather than them actually glowing.
  • ParoXum
    Offline / Send Message
    ParoXum polycounter lvl 9
    I concur,

    -too much red
    -no focal point in main shot, eyes get drawn around your brightest monitor or turning around with no place to rest.
    -this is due to your lighting which is rendering the picture quite flat/monotonous
    -some metal surfaces look as dry wood like the outer walls
    -cables produce a lot of noise and don't really help in creating a flow in the picture
    -very noisy texturing and detail in your objects. Like yellow contour lines everywhere, aluminum that has a lot of wear and tear where it could be a place to rest in between monitors, etc.

    Overall for me it's not bad at all, it just lacks a bit of direction on the mainshot, to make it obvious win, assets on their own are not bad at all.
Sign In or Register to comment.